Advice

[babybaillie]

Really need advice from someone who has been a single parent for a while and had arragements for ex to see kids.

My LO goes to her dads every 2nd weekend. Goes on friday, back sunday. This week he was working away, so he would get her sat instead. I was happy with this. On sat she asked to call her dad at 8.30. I said no lets wait a wee while as he had called me at 11.30 the nite b4 to say that was him just home.

By 3.30pm he still hadnt arrived/called, so i let her call him. He said he was out in glasgow shopping and would collect her later.

Later never came. I put the wean to bed as usual at 9pm.

He txt yday to see when he could get d wean. i ignored the text. He called and i told him i wasnt letting her go due to the days events of yday. He said he was going to call the police, i said that was ok with me and to go ahead.

Today i spoke to him and he said after shopping he went out for dinner, got chatting and forgot about the wean!!! FORGOT!!!

I cannot believe he has done this to our daughter. I have just told him Im seriously considering stopping access which i never ever thot id ever do.

I seriously need some advice on this one. Where do i stand legally? Can i stop access on the grounds of what he did? Or is it time to go see a lawyer?? I put my LO to bed in tears on sat nite cause he didnt show up and he has d cheek to say he forgot and lost track of time. I wish he'd at least lied, god im hurting so much for me LO.

 

[xxannxx]

That is so awful, what a complete b*****d!!!!!
I would have done the exact same thing yesterday, he needs to know he can't let LO down when he feels like it, its so not fair.
Its up to you, but for me stopping access would have to be the absolute last straw, i think for LO's sake you have to make sure that you have exhausted all other alternatives 1st.
Maybe you should go and see a solicitor, and get it drawn up properly, thats what i did. Its not exactly legally binding, but would mean that if stopping access ever occured and he took you to court you would have proof that you had tried everything. I also always think that if anything happened and FOB wasn't around for whatever reason when LO is older, they will know it was their fathers choice.
My arrangement has written out what days ex has LO, and more importantly, what time, so you're not sitting around waiting, not knowing when ex is arriving, and not being able to go out and make your own plans. It does say that extra days may be added for special occasions such as xmas, birthdays, etc, and has both mine and ex's signatures to show that we were both in agreement.
Good luck

 

[mich22]

I really sympathise with you. I have an ex from hell too. My LO's dad is a complete arse hole and pulls crap like that all the time. He made a big fuss about seeing her on fathers day this year because he is jelouse of my OH living with me and my LO and didn't want my OH to steel the fathers day limelight but then didn't show up on fathers day because he was out on the beer the night before, after all that fuss he made too.
I didn't hear from him for a week after that at which point he kicked off because I didn't get my LO to make him a card for fathers day.
If my LO were a little older she would have been heart broken that her dad didn't bother to turn up on fathers day.
How old is your LO??

 

[babybaillie]

shes 4.5 now.

 

[mich22]

Men can be such idiots.
It's so frustrating because you put in all the hard work and then they just turn up and expect to see them as and when they please.
I am just hoping that as my LO gets older she will realise what a tosser her dad is and not bother him anymore.
This is likely because he doesn't pay maintanance or buy her anything and he only turns up when he feels like it.
Do you know what you will do?