loveylove
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Dec 6, 2010
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Hi Ladies,
I have also posted this in 'single parents', I hope it's ok for me to post here as well.
I'm hoping you can help me. I haven't posted on here since I was pregnant and being treated pretty badly by my ex... Long story short, we broke up when my daughter (now 3 years old) was 10 days old. He has always claimed to want me back, even to this day.
Anyway, after years of having supervised visitation (by me), I have gone back to work. James (her dad) has insisted on having her every other Saturday, this is fair enough. The only reason he didn't have her before was because he had a mental breakdown, suffered from depression and had an unhealthy obsession with us getting back together. The police and women's aid eventually got involved.
My problem began when she started Going to his house for the days on Saturday. My daughter would come home and start vomiting by 8pm, she would be sick for hours until she was eventually just gagging up bile. This happened 3 times over 6 weeks, all following a visit to his house.
I should probably tell you that my daughter has allergies- she is allergic to fish, nuts, egg and dairy. She also gets quite bad hay fever.
Anyway, last weekend, following a visit to his house, she was so ill that I couldn't even wake her up properly. Her temperature was 40.6, she was vomiting and limp. I called an ambulance and they took her straight in. Whilst there it was discovered hat she has an allergy to his dog! There's a bug called campylobacter that is transferred via dogs skin flakes and makes children (under 5 mostly) very poorly.
When I told James he hung up on me. He has decided not to give up the dog because it makes him happy, but agrees that she absolutely cannot be in his house, even if the dog wasn't there at the time.
So for the past few weeks I have allowed him in my house (despite the fact he's really rude to me)so that he can spend time with her. I have taken my work laptop and gone into the town to an Internet cafe. I don't like this situation at all! I have boyfriend who stays at my house most nights, I don think it's healthy to have my ex in my home... I know he must go through my stuff. It makes me very uncomfortable. He claims he can't take her out in public because it's expensive, won't take up enough time and plus his car is loaded with dog hairs. I should probably add that her dad works from home for a family business, he claims to not have any money. He lost his managerial job when he became depressed.
I feel like telling him that if he puts the dog before his daughter then he can no longer see her. What would you all do? My daughter likes seeing him but she isn't upset if a few weeks pass where he isn't free to see her. Also, the only local family he has all have dogs (his dad actually lives on a farm) so it's not like visitation can even happen that way.
Any advise would be very much appreciated.
I have also posted this in 'single parents', I hope it's ok for me to post here as well.
I'm hoping you can help me. I haven't posted on here since I was pregnant and being treated pretty badly by my ex... Long story short, we broke up when my daughter (now 3 years old) was 10 days old. He has always claimed to want me back, even to this day.
Anyway, after years of having supervised visitation (by me), I have gone back to work. James (her dad) has insisted on having her every other Saturday, this is fair enough. The only reason he didn't have her before was because he had a mental breakdown, suffered from depression and had an unhealthy obsession with us getting back together. The police and women's aid eventually got involved.
My problem began when she started Going to his house for the days on Saturday. My daughter would come home and start vomiting by 8pm, she would be sick for hours until she was eventually just gagging up bile. This happened 3 times over 6 weeks, all following a visit to his house.
I should probably tell you that my daughter has allergies- she is allergic to fish, nuts, egg and dairy. She also gets quite bad hay fever.
Anyway, last weekend, following a visit to his house, she was so ill that I couldn't even wake her up properly. Her temperature was 40.6, she was vomiting and limp. I called an ambulance and they took her straight in. Whilst there it was discovered hat she has an allergy to his dog! There's a bug called campylobacter that is transferred via dogs skin flakes and makes children (under 5 mostly) very poorly.
When I told James he hung up on me. He has decided not to give up the dog because it makes him happy, but agrees that she absolutely cannot be in his house, even if the dog wasn't there at the time.
So for the past few weeks I have allowed him in my house (despite the fact he's really rude to me)so that he can spend time with her. I have taken my work laptop and gone into the town to an Internet cafe. I don't like this situation at all! I have boyfriend who stays at my house most nights, I don think it's healthy to have my ex in my home... I know he must go through my stuff. It makes me very uncomfortable. He claims he can't take her out in public because it's expensive, won't take up enough time and plus his car is loaded with dog hairs. I should probably add that her dad works from home for a family business, he claims to not have any money. He lost his managerial job when he became depressed.
I feel like telling him that if he puts the dog before his daughter then he can no longer see her. What would you all do? My daughter likes seeing him but she isn't upset if a few weeks pass where he isn't free to see her. Also, the only local family he has all have dogs (his dad actually lives on a farm) so it's not like visitation can even happen that way.
Any advise would be very much appreciated.
