Afraid to have an orgasm

[Neesham]

Hi, I'm 40 years old and this is the first time I conceived with the help of IVF. I will be entering my second trimester next week and so far everything is fine.

Because I had to wait so long for this and I had to go through so much for this, I was afraid to risk anything. That's I have stayed away from sex (or having any sort of orgasm) for the last 12 weeks (since the IVF). Because my body was used to having so much sex, I am finding it extremely difficult, more so when my partner kisses me that makes me feel aroused until the next day or so. It's just difficult.

Does my pregnancy fall into high risk pregnancy given my age and the IVF?

Also, am I doing the right thing by not taking any chances with orgasm or is it completely safe for me to have sex in my second trimester?

 

[Cornfieldland]

Hi, if your pregnancy is not high risk and you havnt had any bleeding it should be ok. Ask you obgyn at ur next appointment it get the official ok if your concerned about it. I found it hard to relax during sex until more recently so I understand where ur coming from.

 

[Spiffynoodles]

I'm at risk of preterm labor and my OB was completely supportive of me having sex and having orgasms. If your OB hasn't said no, then you should be just fine. Plus, I've been told that the baby feels some of the happy endorphins from your orgasm, too.

 

[Powell130]

Sex is perfectly fine. You really didn't even have to wait until second tri. Your doc would have already put you on pelvic rest if there were an issue. Being high risk doesn't automatically make it unsafe I was high risk with #1 due to gestational diabetes and was clear to have sex.

 

[pinkpassion]

I agree orgasm is healthy and safe for baby and uterus. It helps tone your uterus for labor too. When pregnant with dd after several miscarriages I would have spontaneous orgasm in my sleep and wake up to intense cramping but all was well!! Just know an orgasm is the uterus contracting so it may feel strange or scary bit it's fine and baby will be fine!!

 

[Bumblebee117]

Good to have read the answers, I was concerned too. Even though I never had any issues, I was very anxious about it!

 

[MollyNorwood]

Just wanted to chime in and say (firstly) Congratulations on your pregnancy! Also, your concerns are totally valid but as all PP's have pointed out you are good to go as long as you haven't been put on pelvic rest for some reason.
I have now had two assisted pregnancies and in my first I waited 12 weeks like you did, but we started out slowly and turned out I was fine. i experienced no major issues, and same as now I occasionally get a little bit of cramping afterwards but its a good thing.
Go for it! haha

 

[Misscalais]

Congratulations.
Unless your care providers have told you no sex then there's no reason why you cant. I get braxton hicks after an orgasm and have with all my babies and they are all fine
Just take it easy, no rough stuff.

 

[Lues]

I was on pelvic rest for the first 12 weeks. I was in fertility care (IUI not IVF though) and it was just their standard rule for ALL of their patients across the board.

They're pretty conservative.

I was worried too (especially after 3 years of trying and one miscarriage). "what makes it magically safe at 12 weeks????" i kept asking them. Ultimately, the answer was that it was probably fine a while ago... baby is VERY firmly implanted by 8 weeks at the most, so the uterine contractions are no longer an issue. But the extra few weeks is just the safety net.

That made me feel a bit better, like I had already done the extra safe version.

Plus, it really was tough. It's frustrating sexually... and you don't get that wonderful relaxation and mentally clearing aspect of an orgasm. And for my husband and I, it's very connecting.

It was a long 12 weeks. And it made the first few times after the 12 week mark a bit stressful. We only did it twice a week at the most for the first 2-3 weeks. But now it's whenever and it doesn't worry me anymore.

I know I don't have IVF experience, but I really understand your situation so I thought I'd share my experience.

 

[Nikkita.Jono]

I am 18w 4d from a successful IUI, no one mentioned anything to me about avoiding sex or orgasms. We have continued to have sex and although i do feel a little bit uncomfortable in my tummy at times, theres been no problem

 

[minties]

I like what everyone else has said. Unless you are on pelvic rest, experiencing bleeding or cramps etc then orgasm is fine. It sends a rush of oxygenated blood to baby and feel-good hormones.

I am automatically 'high-risk' due to having 2 c-sections and will see a consultant from 20 weeks on, but orgasms ahoy! I make sure I have one every couple of days.

 

[pinkpassion]

but orgasms ahoy! I make sure I have one every couple of days.

Must be nice

 

[claireybell]

If your not high risk & havent been advised otherwise hun.. Get your groove on im mega horny this pg but wasnt as much with my first but i was more scared of sex/orgasms then.. I think i was 25-30 wks begore i suddenly relaxed & got too aroused i had to go with it Lol! Theres more blood fliw to your regions aswell so its oober great haha! Enjoy