Am i over reacting?

[MissJ]

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[DanielleM]

I think you need to tell her and tell her that this is your child, her grandchild and she needs to take a step back. Do you live at home with your mum? I think you need to set the boundries before the baby comes along.
I am giving you this advice as when I had my first son I lived at home with my mum and dad and was also 19 when I had him. I was very lucky that my mum and dad gave me £1000 to help with baby stuff but they left me to pick everything myself. When I had Evan they made it quite clear to me that he was my child and they would help with the odd things but they never got up for night feeds or did the washing, ironing, etc for me or Evan which is the way I liked it we made these boundries before he arrived and after 3 months me and Evan moved into our own house (I was waiting to find a house beforehand and also was a little bit scared to move into a house with a newborn as I was a single parent).
Hope this helps a bit and now I am 25 and in a stable relationship with my second on the way.
If you want to ask me anything else just PM me or write on here, hope it all works out with you and your mum but just be strong and tell her otherwise you will be suffering in silence, remember its your baby and you make the decisions in its life not it's grandmother. xxx

 

[MissJ]

Yeh i live at home right now, but will be moving in with my OH soon.. I know shes just excited i just wish she would take a step back and let me enjoy this, thank you xxx

 

[RachelRae]

I don't think you're over re-acting at all! It's your baby, but my mom can be the same way sometimes. I don't think they realize that they're doing it, maybe you can talk to her and have her bring you along whenever she wants to shop for your baby. After all, it is yours and you want to pick out things. Especially since it's your first! I just suggest talking to her, hopefully she'll understand.

xx

 

[Pixxie]

I don't have any personal experience but this seems to be quite common with grandma to be's! You need to tell her, calmly, that while you appreciate the help she is being slightly overbearing and you would please like her to chill out and take a step back.

You need to stand up to her now otherwise they get much worse once the baby comes! xxx

 

[x__amour]

I'm so sorry
I feel your pain to an extent, my Mom is incredibly suffocating but my Mom hasn't gone out and bought me anything, period. Just talk to your Mom and try and make her understand. Yes, she's a Grandma now but in the end this is YOUR baby. I know she's just trying to be helpful but she should let you help too! Make it a mother-daughter thing! Good luck hon!

 

[amygwen]

I'm sorry. I don't think you're overreacting at all. It is your baby and it's your first one so I'm sure you want to buy all the things that YOU want that suits you best. My mom bought quite a bit of stuff which I was thankful for because I know she was saving me money. For example, she bought a bedside bassinet (which was about $200 [that's like 120 pounds]) and I reallllly was happy she bought it, but it didn't match anything that went in his room and I really didn't like it, plus she spent quite a bit on it and I could've gotten a much cheaper one that I would've liked. Have you talked to her about it? And just explained you have money to buy things for your LO and she doesn't have to buy anything, plus you appreciate it but you really wanna buy stuff for your baby?

 

[18singlemom2b]

i don't think your overreacting, pregnancy has tons of rollercoaster emotions and i can see where you're coming from. just make sure you mention to your mom that you REALLY appreciate that she's supporting you and helping you financially by buying things. because you have no clue how many young mom2be's there are out here whose parent's won't give them a dollar toward anything baby related and affording everything is very hard. so be happy that she's helping you but for sure explain to her that you appreciate it but just want space to buy a few special things yourself, as it's a special time for you.

 

[MissMamma]

in their eyes you're still their baby! they cant see that you're totally capable of doing this yourself, i would sit down and have a chat with your mum. dont get upset or angry or ungrateful and she'll see that you can do this your way and that infact it would be more beneficial to let you do it your way.
i hope she understands hun

 

[MissJ]

Thank you all so much! I really do appreaciate that shes only tying to help out.. I dont think shes sees that its getting me down as i dont want to hurt her feelings.

Im gunna have a little talk with her tomorrow i think, I need her help just not like this. Everyday theres more baby stuff here that i diddnt even know about.

I hope she understands xxx

 

[MissMamma]

my MIL was exactly the same, however OH didnt go about telling her in such a nice way and it ended up creating a massive family divide so my only advice is stay calm with her and be nice