Am I overreacting ?

[mama2b]

Please be totally honest with me if you think im over reacting here.

I have been with my bf for 5 years and a year ago we had a bit of a bad patch, I just got really bored and wanted to go out all the time behaved like a bit of a bitch really and he was totally devastated begged me to stay with him and not to finish things. In the end I gave in and gave it a second chance we moved in together at the end of may and everything has been good until pretty much when I found out I was pregnant.

Over the last few months things have got quite bad (in my eyes) a few of his friends have split up with their partners and just want to go out all the time, or sit round at home playing on the wii. Anyway he is virtually out all the time at his friends, and wants to go out every weekend and leave me by myself. We were supposed to go out for a meal tonight but instead he said we'd save money and get a take away and then an hour ago has upped and left to go round his mates !!!

I am sick of it, I don't mind him going out but not every bloody night especially when I can't really go out, he even wants to leave me on my own on new years eve. We have had quite a few 'chats' about this and he seems to think ive lost my mind.

I feel really trapped, if i was pregnant id either go out all the time myself or I really would of told him to do one and moved back to my parents. Obviously I can't do either now and its really, really getting me down.

What can I do ? Its like he is obsessed with now being with his friends 24/7

 

[krissie1234uk]

I don't think you are over reacting at all. He should not being going out and leaving you on your own all the time. Once in a while is fine, but when you aren't able to go out like that yourself it is unfair completely. The new years thing is ridiculous too, its a time for you to spend together!
It could be that he is feeling under pressure and overwhelmed, but this is no excuse as he should be telling you this rather than running away and playing out with his friends!
Let him know how isolated he is making you feel and remind him that just because you are having this baby together, does not mean that you will stay with him no matter what.

 

[Stardancer]

Might he be 'cramming' because once the baby comes he knows he won't be able to do it anymore? Have you asked if you can go with him? He should want to be with you aswell... or something is wrong...
Just go out yourself, I know you can't drink but there's other things you could do!! See how he likes it!

 

[elm]

I agree with krissie - you're not over reacting at all.

When your LO arrives it's probably going to be harder for you to get out together so this is a time when it's maybe a good idea to spend the little bit extra on having a meal out somewhere together?

I think he should be with you on New Years Eve too. You're being totally rational about it all, you've just got to get him to see that xxx

 

[Mrs_Nesbit]

He sounds like he knows he's got you over a barrel tbh. I dont like the sound of it all at all!!
If it were me I'd invite all of his so called mates around for a social evening and while they were ALL in the same room ask them all including your fella what the hell they all think they are playing at!

 

[mama2b]

Thank you I wasn't sure if I was loosing my marbles and being completely irrational !

I have had a chat with him and he has basically said if I want him to stay in new years eve, and be at home more often he will because thats what I want but (now i might be being irrational!.....) I can't help thinking he would only be staying in so not to upset me, its not what HE wants, after 5 years I can't believe he suddenly wants to go out partying all the time and leave me on my own

I am staying at my friends tomorrow as he doesn't finish work until 8.30 then will be out late the following night playing football, i don't want to be on my own 2 nights in a row and hoping he will realise tomorrow how boring it is being on his own. Mind you he will probably take advantage of the fact im not in and just go round to his friends after work grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Will let you know how it goes xxxx

 

[elm]

glad you've been able to talk to him about it and got somewhere with him at least xxx

Show him what he's been missing by not staying at home with you when you get chance!!!

x