...and I'm back.

[Dill]

I got to enjoy a week of known pregnancy before I MC'd today. We'll try again next cycle. A second MC in 5 months sucks. I took today off from work to grieve and deal with the physical issues, and I'm hoping I can manage a full day of work tomorrow. It was "just" a chemical (like that hurts any less?), so we are hoping it doesn't really disrupt my cycle and we get to give it another go in two-ish weeks. Trying to stay optimistic and not let it get to me like the last one did.

My hubby was on the phone with his mom, who was babysitting his infant niece. He had it on speaker phone, and she kept crying and crying and crying, and I almost lost it. I just sat there and cried quietly so MIL wouldn't overhear. It was too much to bear.

Sigh.

 

[hope2bmother]

Oh Dill, I am so sorry you have experienced another loss! And I don't care if it was "chemical" or not. The point is you were pregnant with a little one and things did not work out. It is a huge loss and I hope that you do not think it was "just this" or "just that". Your feelings are valid and I hope that you will allow yourself the chance to fully feel them and process them. And if you can't work tomorrow, there's absolutely nothing wrong with taking the day off. It is your second loss. One loss is too many and the pain is unbearable. I don't care what stage of pregnancy one was in when the loss occurred. Embrace your sadness. This is a heartbreaking time. Have a good cry or several and be gentle with yourself.

I hope that your body gets quickly back to baseline and that you are soon holding your rainbow baby!

I am here if you want to talk.

 

[jumpingo]

Oh Dill, I am so sorry you have experienced another loss! And I don't care if it was "chemical" or not. The point is you were pregnant with a little one and things did not work out. It is a huge loss and I hope that you do not think it was "just this" or "just that". Your feelings are valid and I hope that you will allow yourself the chance to fully feel them and process them. And if you can't work tomorrow, there's absolutely nothing wrong with taking the day off. It is your second loss. One loss is too many and the pain is unbearable. I don't care what stage of pregnancy one was in when the loss occurred. Embrace your sadness. This is a heartbreaking time. Have a good cry or several and be gentle with yourself.

I hope that your body gets quickly back to baseline and that you are soon holding your rainbow baby!

I am here if you want to talk.

yes, all of this, exactly.

 

[steph.]

Unfortunately, I'm back too. Chemical in november, and found out today at 7 weeks that this pregnancy is doomed, so as of now waiting to miscarry. Just the thought of ttc all over again, and then the stress of early pregnancy waiting to see if sticks or not is exhausting. But I know I will be trying again straight away. The only way to heal for me is to get my rainbow.

 

[coucou11]

I'm so sorry Dill - sending many hugs your way and wishing you a speedy BFP this next cycle.

 

[emma4g63]

so sorry dill and steph!!

terrible to experiece any loss!!!
i had a chemical last cycle after my MMC in november ... i was devasted but can only move forward
hugs hunX

 

[claudinator]

dill & Steph

 

[Dill]

So sorry, steph.

Thank you for the support, ladies. I am feeling better today, and the bleeding has lightened significantly. My pregnancy symptoms are already draining away. I am very, very tired, and still a little dizzy from all the blood loss, but at work and trying to hang in there. The hardest part, at this point, is the emotional pain. I just want to scream and shout and curl up somewhere quiet to be alone, but I can't.

I just keep telling myself that my next ovulation will be here before I know it!