Anger issues.

[babytots]

Hi I have posted in here once before about my son. He isn't diagnosed with anything yet but I suspect he has a behavioural problem as he struggles with his emotions and finds it hard to socialise as well as being behind his peers. I've raised my concerns with my hv who did a home visit and apart from his speech she was happy with him. Though she did catch him on a good day which is just sods law.

That was a good few months ago now and his behaviour did slightly improve with the support of his nursery teacher and us trying to deal with it in a more calmer way but recently he is getting out of control and I'm just at the end of my tether.

For instance today he hit his younger brother over the head with his road tracks out of anger that his brother was trying to get them so I took them away and told him they had gone in the bin (I hid them). cue a screeching fit at me and him throwing a coin from his pocket in anger and then he proceeded to hit and stomp on a notepad. When he calmed down he told me the notepad made him sad and when I asked why it made him sad he couldn't express why. I presume he was sad that I took his tracks away. Breaks my heart when he gets like this as I just want to be able to help him and I can't

I'm going to start a diary making a note of his angry outbursts as well as recording him so I have something to show my hv. I don't know how much longer I can go on it not only effects us as parents but our children too our youngest because he gets the brunt of his anger and our oldest two because they often get neglected as I'm constantly trying to calm him down.

If anyone has any tips or advise it would be greatfully recieved. x

 

[mummy2o]

My advise is to make him his own space to calm down in. Somewhere he can be by himself just to bring himself down. Don't make a big deal over his melt down, tantrum whatever you want to call it but make sure he's in a safe place he can't hurt anyone in. My son use to have a book corner in his room, which has lots of cushions so he can throw or punch or do whatever he does with those.

I also know one child who loves to draw, so he draws out his anger on paper, rather than saying what is bothering him, then describes what he's doing to his parents/teacher once he's calmed down. He's older though at 6 so this might not work yet, and it wouldn't work for my son as he hates drawing.

 

[Reid]

It must be really hard especially you having other children. I can only tell you my experience with my 3 1/2 year old he to isn't diagnosed with anything well other than speech delay. He to gets really frustrated at times when he can't communicate what he wants though he has really calmed down in the past few months.
His speech delay was 1st brought to my attention at his 30 check with the hv and a few weeks after this I called her to come and do a home visit and refer us on to speech therapy and audiology. The audiology didn't find anything wrong with his hearing.
So he's now been at nursery 4 months but he's only getting 2 hours 3 day a week when he's entitled to 16 hours but the nursery basically don't have the facilitys to help him so we are in the process of trying to get him into a more specialist nursery who work with smaller groups of kids and have speech therapist on Hand each day more 1 to 1 if you like which I think would really help him plus he would actually get his full 16 hours I'm hoping to find out before Christmas if he can get into this nursery I've not been to visit it yet but it really dose sound fantastic for a child which speech issues.
You should keep on at you're hv
Feel free to pm if there's anything in particular you want to ask I'll help as best I can were I Scotland btw xx