Announcing After 2 Losses

[JulyHopes4]

hello, just wondering if anyone has any advice or opinions on announcing your pregnancy after multiple losses. I am pregnant for the third time after two early m/c (no living children). Right now I am at 13w2d and just had an US a few days ago showing a healthy baby/heartbeat.

I told people the first two times too soon and then had to explain the loss over and over again when they would ask about the baby/pregnancy and it was horribly painful.

In addition to being nervous in general b/c of the two previous m/c, i had to have a CVS done at my appointment a few days ago and now I am concerned b/c of the odds from that as well.

I guess I am just looking for advice on when I can feel safe, although i am aware that anything can happen at any time obviously. Any help would be amazing and greatly appreciated!

 

[Loxottica]

Anyone?
I'm curious as well.

 

[LoraLoo]

Im the opposite really- last time we didnt tell anyone til 12 weeks and baby died at 18 weeks. We also lost a daughter at 5 days. So this time I just thought sod it. I announced on facebook- thought it was easier to get everyone over and done with in 1 go. This was my status

There are never any guarantees about Tomorrow, especially when it comes to pregnancy. Babies can be lost at 4 weeks, 14 weeks, 40 weeks, and beyond, as I sadly know all too well. But just for today, everything is ok. Baby Allonby #7 due Nov '13. Please cross your fingers, toes, and everything else for us.

 

[Smiler82]

To be honest, you probably won't ever feel safe. This pregnancy I keep tellling myself - I'll feel better after the early scan....I'll feel better after the 12 week scan ... I'll feel better when I've got a bump .... and it just doesn't happen. My latest mantra is: I'll feel better when I can feel the baby move, but really I know until the baby is in my arms I'm never going to feel safe. And even then I'm sure I'll start worrying about accidents, illness etc

My situation is pretty much identical to yours, with our first two we shared the news around 8 weeks. This time we waited til 12 weeks to tell family, and 14 weeks to tell friends. I was terrified of sharing the news because I thought once I opened my mouth, that would be it and something would go horribly wrong. I was so, so nervous in the days following the announcements.

But - I do now feel better for having told people. It is really nice to hear the lovely messages from people wishing us well, and hearing them helped me to have some positive thoughts amongst all the negative ones. It was also a relief to stop having to come up with excuses for why not drinking, why not exercising, why not doing this that or the other... covering up a pregnancy can actually be really tiring so it's nice not to have to pretend!

Are you waiting for more results? If it's not going to be too long to get the results then if I were you I'm sure I'd wait til the results were in before telling people. But it's so great you've gotten this far already and heard the heartbeat and seen your baby. I hope that everyone works out perfectly for you this time x

 

[george83]

Loraloo - I've cried my way through your story your such an amazingly strong woman and what a beautiful status to put up, you certainly have my prayers x x

Julyhopes4 - we waited until a scan at 11 weeks last time before telling anybody our news and then only told immediate family until our nhs scan, this time we agreed to tell people after our scan at 9 weeks instead of keeping it a total secret but found out we'd miscarried, I know it's not a guarantee but I'd share after my 12 scan IF I get a next time

 

[Brightstarshi]

I know how you feel,I told someone yesterday and felt so anxious...I havnt told anyone in my hometown.I can totally relate ((HUGS)) xx