Any advice :/

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - First Trimester' started by mummy2one, Jun 4, 2011.

  1. mummy2one

    mummy2one DS (8) OH (34) ME (30)

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    Me and OH are waiting to tell parents and friends until at least our 12week scan possibly later as Im a bigger lady and may not show and Im not suffering with any MS (touch wood) :haha:
    Anyway Im scared to the ends of the earth about telling parents (and friends) as OH has recently been made jobless, but he is doing his best to find another job asap. Im worried they will have a right go at us and tbh Im not sure we could handle any stress regarding our pregnancy.
    We have a DS who is our world but we are so ready for this bubba, our DS does have some delays with development but this doesn't alter anything, Im just hoping our families can be understanding.

    I was wondering if anyone else had experienced anything like the dread of telling parents because of job loss or anything similar :/
     
  2. sweetm

    sweetm Pregnant with my first

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    I don't have any advice, but I recently lost my job. Now, in the middle of my job search, I find out I'm pregnant. DH has a steady job, but we're unprepared for a pregnancy. I fear that our families will react poorly because 1) we are living with DH's parents and 2) I don't have a job. Needless to say, I feel like a bit of a failure.

    I'm hoping others here will have some advice.
     
  3. lesbianlove

    lesbianlove mummy to 3 boys :)

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    hey hun dont worry im sure parents will be fine, and after all theres 9 months to try n find another job, and its not them thats gonna be coping with 2 kids its you and your husband and u feel ready for it so thel just have to accept that and let u get n with it its your life u do what u like good luck telling them x
     
  4. mummy2one

    mummy2one DS (8) OH (34) ME (30)

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    Aww hun your not a failure try not to feel like that :flower: We didnt expect OH to loose his job and we know he will find another, we were shocked but happy to find out we were expecting I just fear the parents will be angry :shrug:
     
  5. mummy2one

    mummy2one DS (8) OH (34) ME (30)

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    Thank you Lesbianlove, I hope they are happy, both sides have had a rough year so far so Im hoping deep down this will be good news to them all. Like you say 9months and Im sure he will find another job as he has his head set on it lol x
     
  6. lesbianlove

    lesbianlove mummy to 3 boys :)

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    yeah thats it hun ur obv very happy bout the pregnancy so dont try n let anyone take that away, im sure ur husband will find something as he knows hes got a wee family to look after he seems like a good man :)
     
  7. readytta

    readytta Well-Known Member

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    They can't be angry surely- just because your OH has lost his job doesn't mean the end of the world. Like you said, he's looking for another job and that's great. If you think they will be angry and it will put stress on you then maybe keep it quieter until you feel ready to share or when your OH is in work again if you feel they'd react better? I'd hope that they would be even more supportive rather than angry but if not then do what's best for you, even if that means keeping the pregnancy to yourselves for now. x
     
  8. readytta

    readytta Well-Known Member

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    hey sweetm, you're not a failure. Keep your chin up and keep yourself busy job hunting in the meantime. You will get something. Things always have a way of working themselves out. It's not ideal staying with parents (been there, done that) but it's good when family are there to support you through hard patches. Put yourself first, not your families and tell them when you feel ready to. x
     
  9. Court28

    Court28 Well-Known Member

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    I havent experienced having to tell the parents anything like that yet, but if you explain the whole situation, that he is trying really hard to get a job etc, and let them know how happy and excited you are about this baby, then hopefully they will see that everything will be fine and will work out the way it is meant to and they can be happy and excited too :)
     
  10. bubba03

    bubba03 Active Member

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    It's looking likely that we will be in a similar situation soon. I know that his parents will be thrilled with the baby but my mother will be very unimpressed. She has previously informed me that I have one of each therefore I am "not allowed" any more children and she cannot afford any more grand children.

    Last week, OH was told by work that they will ring him when work comes in for him to do and consider this an extended holiday (but no pay due to not working there long enough). Although it's helpful for him to organise the children while I'm suffering with MS it's not going to help all the family chipping in with the can't afford any more children comments. He is now applying for any job going, stacking shelves to book keeping and he is also completing his training to become an adult tutor to hopefully open up even more avenues.

    Why do people feel the need to comment on your life? I feel awful that other peoples opinions affect my actions when in effect, it has nothing to do with them.

    Chin up and good luck. Hopefully nobody will say anything horrid!
     
  11. mummy2one

    mummy2one DS (8) OH (34) ME (30)

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    Big thanks ladies, Bubba03 hope you get nothing but nice comments :)

    Ive slept on it and not going to tell them until we need to just hope he has a job by then :shrug:
     
  12. babyhearts

    babyhearts Well-Known Member

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    Sometimes you can't please everyone hun, me and oh have worked from 14yrs old I have my own company and everything is good my mum took until right up to my son being born to come to terms with it I just let her get on with it in the background and didn't let it ruin my happy time, there's plenty of jobs at least they will know your oh is looking not just choosing a life of not looking after you and the baby. hope everything works out for you xxxx
     
  13. madge

    madge Well-Known Member

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    Life is too short to delay things like babies until you can afford them. For everyone except a lucky few there will never be enough money for everything, but you just manage and comprimise. If the time is right for your family (emotionally, not financially) then it is the right time now.
     

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