Any med students or physicians here?

[mm962]

I'm currently in my first year of medical school. With this career it doesn't really seem like there will ever be a good time to start having kids. I'm curious about other people's stories of having children while in school or early in their careers.

 

[MindUtopia]

I'm not a med student, but I am working on a PhD in health care related field (so I'm a researcher rather than a clinician). It's slightly different because we have a bit more flexibility in managing our time, but it's been a 7 year commitment for me (and I'm 35, so not a spring chicken anymore). I don't think there is ever a perfect time and you will have to make some sacrifices, but for me, I've found the hardest bit has been financial. It's expensive to pay for childcare so that I can go to school, especially when I don't get paid much, but for me, that's the only way I can do it. I tried getting work done when my daughter was home, but I felt stretched in two many directions, was a crap mother for her and wasn't being productive work-wise either. Obviously, it depends on how soon you feel you're ready for a baby, but I found that taking off time from my degree worked well for me. I took a one year leave of absence when I had her and picked back up when she turned a year old. I am actually still ahead of most of my cohort in my program (after the first 2 years, it's mostly self-directed, you finish as quickly as you can finish, some people take 5 years, some people take 10). Only one person will finish before I do who started at the same time and she didn't take a year off. When you become a mother, you become much better at using your time! I can run circles around some of my non-parent peers now who just aren't so used to multi-tasking! Also, it gives you a new sort of motivation for not giving up. I'm pretty sure I would have given up by now and not finished if I didn't have my daughter's future to think about. Even on the worst day when I am really exhausted and frustrated and don't want to do this work anymore, I know I have to re-group and keep going for her. Do you have the option to take off some time to be at home, even if it's just a term combined with a summer break? Is there any option to take time off after you finish, so to delay your first job or residency or whatever comes next so you can take some time off? That's actually what I'm doing next time. I'll be graduating later this year and then plan to get pregnant and take another maternity leave while I'm doing my job search. I figure finding a job in academia takes time, usually at least a year, so I'd rather use that time productively so I don't have to take time off again later. There really is no perfect time, but whatever you decide, you'll make it work.

 

[Bumpontherun]

I'm a pathologist - just about to be a consultant (your equivalent of attending I think). I had both my girls as a junior doctor. It was tough especially sitting my membership exams with two young kids but I'm glad I went ahead and did. Many of my friends waited until they were more senior and are now struggling with ttc. We will try for a 3rd once I start my new job but I'm so glad I just went ahead and had my kids when I wanted to.