anyone else expecting a biracial child?

[KimmieHawkins]

So I have two sons from my previous marriage(two strong peanut butter cups). Welp, Husband 2.0(upgraded model lol) and I are now expecting our 1st and ONLY child. Hubby is white and I'm Black/Trini. We've heard that raising a biracial kid is a completely different journey.

I would love advice from mothers of biracial children and even moms expecting their first.

 

[minties]

Well, my OH is bi-racial, so I suppose our kids are pretty diluted lol. But I'm white and my OH is half white and half Maori (we are from New Zealand). I make sure to keep up with educating them about their Maori heritage, what iwi/tribe they are descended from, which has been interesting for me also. The kids have Euro names but sometimes we use the Maori versions (Tamati for Thomas, Te Paea is the closest for Sophie). It's very normal in NZ to be bi-racial so it's not something different here, I don't think I know many kids who aren't.

 

[KimmieHawkins]

Well, my OH is bi-racial, so I suppose our kids are pretty diluted lol. But I'm white and my OH is half white and half Maori (we are from New Zealand). I make sure to keep up with educating them about their Maori heritage, what iwi/tribe they are descended from, which has been interesting for me also. The kids have Euro names but sometimes we use the Maori versions (Tamati for Thomas, Te Paea is the closest for Sophie). It's very normal in NZ to be bi-racial so it's not something different here, I don't think I know many kids who aren't.

that's really awesome!!! we both discussed that we want our child to know each culture very well. see we live in the SOUTHEAST of the US, still a lot of racial tension. we're kinda nervous and debating a move to a more diverse area.

 

[jalilma]

My daughters are bi-racial. I'm white their dad is p.r and black... (also on an upgraded model in the man dept... He is mixed (white and black)) and we are also expecting "our first and only" I haven't found it difficult where I live at all and I am thankful for that.

 

[xSweetTartx]

My husband is 100% Vietnamese and I am fairly mixed but let's just call it White. Haha. When dating my husband, the hardest part was more the mean comments from younger Asian women when we would visit Northern Virginia. He's a catch, I get it.

Anyway, after Tyler was born and we went up I found that we were more accepted as a family which I found interesting. Perhaps because a child made our relationship look permanent and concrete. Or perhaps because being a married daddy makes him look unobtainable. The difference in how we were perceived was huge. We often receive compliments on how handsome and adorable Tyler is and no one seems to care.

However, what's most important is that we live in a changing world. Biracial relationships are becoming more common even in media. The stigma is lifting. Honestly, we are all in love. No matter what was ever said to me, it didn't change how I feel about my husband. Bringing a child into the world with him also makes me feel like it's one more step towards making close minded people realize that we are all human and what we look like doesn't matter in the end. Plus, my son is friggin' cute and I cannot wait to see how adorable my daughter is!

 

[Rhiannon137]

I can't speak from personal experience bc DH and I are whiter than rice; however, I understand your concern based on where you live. Do you find the people in your.community accepting of your current blended family? That might give the best insight into what reactions might be.

It's bullshit that this is an issue, but naive to pretend it's not. We had close friends who are dark-skinned Indian immigrants (obviously not biracial, but still "different") who moved to rural NC , and never really felt accepted. There were ni problems, per se, just a very cool receptio . After they had kids, they ultimately chose to move back to the northeast, where diversity is the norm.

I'm sure your kids will do fine since they clearly have parents who put thought into helping them with whatever issues they face, but I completely get wanting them to be surrounded by people who accept them. It's what everyone wants.

 

[dimmu]

DD/bump are mixed-race, I'm white and DH is 2nd/3rd generation mixed-race. We are lucky we live in London which is a melting pot for all sorts of cultures and there are probably more interracial relationships here than anywhere else in the world. I've been with DH for a decade and we are yet to hear a negative, or in fact any kind of comment about our racial backgrounds.

So DD is a true modern day Londoner, as will be the bump, and if anything she's benefited from her mixed heritage. DH is half-Trini and DD has been lucky enough to travel to Trinidad twice already to meet her family there and she's only five.

 

[KimmieHawkins]

I can't speak from personal experience bc DH and I are whiter than rice; however, I understand your concern based on where you live. Do you find the people in your.community accepting of your current blended family? That might give the best insight into what reactions might be.

It's bullshit that this is an issue, but naive to pretend it's not. We had close friends who are dark-skinned Indian immigrants (obviously not biracial, but still "different") who moved to rural NC , and never really felt accepted. There were ni problems, per se, just a very cool receptio . After they had kids, they ultimately chose to move back to the northeast, where diversity is the norm.

I'm sure your kids will do fine since they clearly have parents who put thought into helping them with whatever issues they face, but I completely get wanting them to be surrounded by people who accept them. It's what everyone wants.

both of our families are blended(both of our siblings married out of their race) and very accepting. we've gotten nasty looks and comments from both black and white people(oddly enough mostly black men). We're hoping our child understands you don't have to identify with only one side. plus, if she/he catches any crap they have 2 big athletic brothers to handle it. lol

 

[KimmieHawkins]

My husband is 100% Vietnamese and I am fairly mixed but let's just call it White. Haha. When dating my husband, the hardest part was more the mean comments from younger Asian women when we would visit Northern Virginia. He's a catch, I get it.

Anyway, after Tyler was born and we went up I found that we were more accepted as a family which I found interesting. Perhaps because a child made our relationship look permanent and concrete. Or perhaps because being a married daddy makes him look unobtainable. The difference in how we were perceived was huge. We often receive compliments on how handsome and adorable Tyler is and no one seems to care.

However, what's most important is that we live in a changing world. Biracial relationships are becoming more common even in media. The stigma is lifting. Honestly, we are all in love. No matter what was ever said to me, it didn't change how I feel about my husband. Bringing a child into the world with him also makes me feel like it's one more step towards making close minded people realize that we are all human and what we look like doesn't matter in the end. Plus, my son is friggin' cute and I cannot wait to see how adorable my daughter is!

omg!!! he is absolutely adorable!!! I bet he gets away with everything! lol

 

[KimmieHawkins]

DD/bump are mixed-race, I'm white and DH is 2nd/3rd generation mixed-race. We are lucky we live in London which is a melting pot for all sorts of cultures and there are probably more interracial relationships here than anywhere else in the world. I've been with DH for a decade and we are yet to hear a negative, or in fact any kind of comment about our racial backgrounds.

So DD is a true modern day Londoner, as will be the bump, and if anything she's benefited from her mixed heritage. DH is half-Trini and DD has been lucky enough to travel to Trinidad twice already to meet her family there and she's only five.

you did a great job picking!!! Trini is the way to go. lol we make yearly trip to Trinidad. Cant wait to take the new baby

 

[dimmu]

DD/bump are mixed-race, I'm white and DH is 2nd/3rd generation mixed-race. We are lucky we live in London which is a melting pot for all sorts of cultures and there are probably more interracial relationships here than anywhere else in the world. I've been with DH for a decade and we are yet to hear a negative, or in fact any kind of comment about our racial backgrounds.

So DD is a true modern day Londoner, as will be the bump, and if anything she's benefited from her mixed heritage. DH is half-Trini and DD has been lucky enough to travel to Trinidad twice already to meet her family there and she's only five.

you did a great job picking!!! Trini is the way to go. lol we make yearly trip to Trinidad. Cant wait to take the new baby

Haha I agree!! I love Trinidad, been there twice now and have had such a lovely time, everyone has been so friendly and welcoming. DH hadn't been back since he was a teen so it's been great for him as well to be reunited with the family there, and it was all because he wanted DD to feel a connection to that side of her heritage. Whereabouts do you go when you go to Trinidad? The pic in my avatar is DD in Tobago, she just loves it there as well.

 

[xSweetTartx]

omg!!! he is absolutely adorable!!! I bet he gets away with everything! lol

Haha. He certainly tries!

 

[KimmieHawkins]

DD/bump are mixed-race, I'm white and DH is 2nd/3rd generation mixed-race. We are lucky we live in London which is a melting pot for all sorts of cultures and there are probably more interracial relationships here than anywhere else in the world. I've been with DH for a decade and we are yet to hear a negative, or in fact any kind of comment about our racial backgrounds.

So DD is a true modern day Londoner, as will be the bump, and if anything she's benefited from her mixed heritage. DH is half-Trini and DD has been lucky enough to travel to Trinidad twice already to meet her family there and she's only five.

you did a great job picking!!! Trini is the way to go. lol we make yearly trip to Trinidad. Cant wait to take the new baby

Haha I agree!! I love Trinidad, been there twice now and have had such a lovely time, everyone has been so friendly and welcoming. DH hadn't been back since he was a teen so it's been great for him as well to be reunited with the family there, and it was all because he wanted DD to feel a connection to that side of her heritage. Whereabouts do you go when you go to Trinidad? The pic in my avatar is DD in Tobago, she just loves it there as well.

I'm from the port of Spain.

 

[KimmieHawkins]

omg!!! he is absolutely adorable!!! I bet he gets away with everything! lol

Haha. He certainly tries!

Oh my gosh!!!! The chubby wubby!

 

[ThiaC]

omg!!! he is absolutely adorable!!! I bet he gets away with everything! lol

Haha. He certainly tries!

He's incredibly cute, SweetTart! I've been checking pics of asian/white babies, and my baby fever is growing by the minute

Great thread, Kimmie, good place to share thoughts

I'll be having a mixed one too, Finnish/Shanghainese, so I guess baby'll have a big nose and small eyes .Or who knows, with some luck it'll be the opposite??

In the beginning I did notice we turned heads, but now I just don't pay attention anymore. I guess globalization results in it being less of a deal.

 

[KimmieHawkins]

omg!!! he is absolutely adorable!!! I bet he gets away with everything! lol

Haha. He certainly tries!

He's incredibly cute, SweetTart! I've been checking pics of asian/white babies, and my baby fever is growing by the minute

Great thread, Kimmie, good place to share thoughts

I'll be having a mixed one too, Finnish/Shanghainese, so I guess baby'll have a big nose and small eyes .Or who knows, with some luck it'll be the opposite??

In the beginning I did notice we turned heads, but now I just don't pay attention anymore. I guess globalization results in it being less of a deal.

oddly enough....since I've been pregnant we don't get the crazy stares(I look 5 months even though I'm only 5 weeks. lol) we live in hillbilly central in South Carolina but either I just don't pay it attention or it's getting better.

 

[bunnyblonde]

not sure if anyone said this yet, but usually the hair takes some time to figure out. I have a lot of biracial friends and know a few people with biracial kids and none of their hair is the same. Also i know one of my friends growing up's mom said that people would ask her if she adopted or if it was her child, but that was in the 90s

 

[KimmieHawkins]

not sure if anyone said this yet, but usually the hair takes some time to figure out. I have a lot of biracial friends and know a few people with biracial kids and none of their hair is the same. Also i know one of my friends growing up's mom said that people would ask her if she adopted or if it was her child, but that was in the 90s

lol I have black natural hair and Hubby has the White version of kinky curly hair...so if it's a girl i'll at least know how to detangle and moisturize. The braiding and styling I don't think I will ever understand. lol so daddy is coming out of pocket.