Anyone else keeping names secret until birth?

[MImom2be]

So my husband and I have been discussing this, pretty much since we found out we were pregnant. What we are GOING to share and what we are keeping for a surprise.

We decided we'd share gender, and that when we did, family would be the FIRST to know, after that, close friends and then finally, we'd post about it on Facebook if we wanted to. It went over great, everyone found out when they were supposed to, in the order they were supposed to

However, his family is CONSTANTLY giving us all sorts of flack over us keeping the name secret until our baby girl is born. We've respectfully told them at LEAST 30 times now, "We put a lot of thought and time into choosing the names, and while we appreciate your desire to know what it is, we've chosen to keep this a surprise until she gets here."

It's really getting to the point of his family trying to bribe him (mind you, mine has fully respected our privacy) saying they'd take him out to meals, or buy something customized for the baby, "if only we knew her name" kind of crap.

Personally, I believe it is everyone's own prerogative if they choose to share gender/name during pregnancy or wait til the baby's born, I'm just curious if anyone else running into these problems with their family/significant other's family, and how did you handle it?

Thanks!

 

[_Lexi_]

We won't be telling anyone. I don't think names should be confirmed until you've met them, it might not suit them!! We had a short list of names for Joshua that we loved, when he came, none of them seemed right, we'd never even discussed Joshua, but it just seemed perfect. Even if you do have a name definetely decided, just tell them you want to meet baby first. My brother and sil are having a boy, she's due Tuesday, up until 2 weeks ago he was definetely going to be called Cooper, but they've just decided they don't like it after all. If you have customised items, you won't feel able to change your mind if for any reason you wanted too. Don't feel pressurised to tell anyone if you don't want to, it's completely up to you x

 

[Scout]

I'm not sharing it with anyone. The reason being is that when I was thinking about different names, everytime I told one of them I'd have people tell me, "you will not name the baby that!" or something similar, and I just got tired of it. Tbh, I was set on a name but am now thinking of something different anyways, so I don't even know for sure, but I'm keeping all of this to myself (except I did post on the names section here bc you all don't know me) As far as family, friends and such, I've told them they'll know when she's born and when they moan about it I tell them the truth...that I just got tired of all the negativity thrown at me for my choices.

 

[nabo86]

we want to keep it a secret and we are sick of people asking us! it seems like every man and his dog has an opinion!

we have compromised with both sets of parents and told them we are going to use Rose as a middle name but won't be letting them know the first name till she arrives

 

[Cala]

People do have too many opinions I guess it doesn't surprise me that so many of you are keeping them secret.

The boy's name is a done deal as we're going with a Greek tradition of naming after his father, but the girl's name was free-reign. I had a few at first and like all of you was told for one reason or another, no not that one!

I narrowed it down to two girl names and am leaning towards one in particular, but before I said anything to family I said this is not a negotiation of names, this is me telling you what we like. lol.... they got the hint and shut up.

 

[J22]

We won't be finding out gender and certainly won't be giving any clues to the names we've picked out before the birth to either family or friends. I'm surprised they keep hassling to know the name....you'd think they'd be looking forward to the surprise at birth x

 

[Nela]

We have the intention of keeping a lot of things secret. No gender and no name reveal here.

 

[MrsTurner2012]

My family know but I won't tell the world until the birth.

We can't decide on a girls name so it will prob keep changing anyway!

 

[SteffyRae]

I am waiting to tell the names the only person to know is my mother (because she lives with us and its too easy to slip up) and my Aunt will know initials because she makes blankets and robes and such.
I find it better to keep it a secret if I knew I wasnt going to blurt it out Id keep the gender a secret.
I want there to be a suprise for people when LO is born. Plus once someone is named you dont hear "oh what an odd name you have" (for the most part) But when you are thinking of names all I get is "Why that name, doesn't really go, why are you doing all those names... yadda yaddda yadda"

 

[plutosblue]

We are on team and as a result won't have a name until they are here! The same happened with my daughter, my family really don't care what we do as long as we are happy, the inlaws on the other hand... Well I don't much care whatever their opinion.

Stick to your guns, if its important to you then just explain that, if they can't accept it then I'm afraid its their problem.

 

[d_b]

Definitely keeping names a secret! I think we'll stay team yellow and pick out a couple names for each sex. The last thing I want to hear about one of my favorites is 'eww you like the name soandso, I went to school with someone named that who ended up in jail' etc etc. lol

 

[MommaCC]

Yes we have decided today to definately keep all names a complete secret this time. We ate still trying to deside whether to find out the sex or not this time??? Eek I just dont know yet! X

 

[Equreuil]

on of my friends who's also pregnant is keeping the name to themselves, though she willingly shared gender. All she's said is that it's not something crazy or out there, just that she wants something to be a surprise for when the baby's born.

I don't think she's gotten any flak, really, though I'm sure at the very least her mom has tried to weasel it out.

I've told both my parents and OH's parents what my name choices are, but not too many others. I can understand wanting to keep it secret, as some people can really be mean if it's a name they don't like. I don't know gender yet, so I can't apply either name choice to baby.

 

[vegazbaby]

we havent talked about sharing or not, but have two names that we sort of have agreed , we arent finding out the sex and think i want to keep the names to ourselves, even if i shared them wed probably get, oh you will change your mind when you see the baby anyway. and i dont want comments on the names either which id probly get

 

[Katteh]

We won't be telling anyone names, we don't even discuss names with anyone. With our daughter we had two names and decided to choose whichever suited her when she was born. We aren't finding out sex this time and will choose a couple of names for each sex and decide when baby is born x

 

[Mjane84]

Stand your ground!!! I made the mistake of mentioning the ones we are considering (won't be final until we see her after she's born) and got "ew, I don't like that" responses. Drives me crazy.

I've had plenty of friends that didn't tell, and never thought anything off about it.

 

[MustBeMummy]

Not saying a word until he's here. I dont care who asks. They can pester as much as they like it just means they will be the last to know lol

 

[LockandKey]

yup we are staying team yellow so keeping gender a secret as well as names. I know about 9 people who are also currently pregnant, and don't trust any of them. I'd rather not have my chosen names stolen, especially considering one girl who is a month behind had already decided to copy just about everything I had been doing in this pregnancy so far. I know they say mimicking is a form of flattery, but it's also annoying too

 

[MImom2be]

Thanks so much for all of the responses!

It's not like we're trying to be cruel about keeping names (not saying that anyone HERE was implying that we are) it's just like many others said, telling the name sort of sets it in stone if people decide to give customized gifts, and there is a chance we'll change our minds.

Our second reason is that my husband's family is VERY VERY forceful in their opinions. I have been told AT LEAST 10 times now that I WILL (Nope, they were not ASKING, they were TELLING ME) be naming my daughter after his grandmother. Granted yes, she is a decent lady (but also very forceful) but the way I see it, she'll already be taking Nick's last name, I'd like MY family's name in there SOMEWHERE. So for a middle name, we both asked my father if we could use his mother's name, of Edith for a middle name. It's not like we're in love with it, but my grandmother, who passed before I was born, was quite the woman, from what I hear. And Nick and I both wanted to honor her. I know how angry his family will be when they hear I am NOT naming my daughter Patricia Anne. *sigh*

I don't know. To be honest, it just feels like with as pushy as his family is being, that they're sucking a decent amount of the joy from our pregnancy. It's gotten so bad that I've had to block most of them from my cell phone and Facebook because of the constant harping.

Alas, things we should've known before saying, "I do." I know that sounds horrid, but thank God Nick's wonderful, otherwise I'd have been gone like YESTERDAY.

 

[sue_88]

My family know her name as they helped me to decide. Other than that it is a secret, I think it's wrong to declare it to the world on Facebook/social networks.