Anyone else NOT going for a vbac- and totally fine about it??

[Gym knickers]

I constantly seem to read about people who are desperate for vbacs/ natural births and I was wondering if there was anyone like me who simply isn't worried either way??
I can see why people feel the way they do but I really don't have that desperate urge to experience natural birth.
My DD was an elcs due to being frank breech and it was a completely calm, happy and positive experience. I was a bit taken aback when first told I needed a section but quickly came to terms with it and have no negative feelings towards my section at all. I don't feel in any way that I've failed or that I've missed out or anything like that (again not saying I can't understand why some people do).
I was lucky in that her apgars were perfect, I recovered well and breastfeeding was a success from the first attempt- I do realise this isn't always the case.
I've been seeing a consultant midwife and my consultant to decide on my next birth and decided on a repeat elcs. There are many reasons for this, some very personal ones regarding DH and lots of practical ones. I originally did plan to go for a vbac but I'm completely fine with it not looking likely.
Reading so many other threads I feel like I'm in the complete minority here. I felt that I bonded extremely well with my daughter and the weeks following her birth were the best of my life- despite the longer recovery. I guess I'm just hoping for a similar experience although I know all births are different. Does anyone else feel similar to me? Again I know an elcs is major surgery and I suppose if dd hadn't been breech I would be here. I just wish I didn't keep reading about how c -sections are the devil- I can't think that as I lie here cuddling my precious girl.

 

[Cjohnson13]

I honestly feel 100% the way you do! I don't yurn for a vbac or vaginal birth. When having my c section last time it was a very tramtic labor for over 18 hours and pushing for 3 1/2 ending in c section that after baby was out had to be put to sleep then hemeraged ect. It's not that I'm being lazy it's that I want a calm collective birth(if that's possible) and in no way hinders on how I feel about my baby. Even after last time I bonded and never felt robbed . IM not saying other woman are wrong for feeling that way. I just personally don't care either way. I just want my rainbow baby heathy!

 

[MrsPear]

I have opted for a VBAC with ELCS at 40+12 if I haven't gone into spontaneous labour. I'd like to give my body the option to do it naturally because I think in an 'ideal' spontaneous labour recovery will be quicker than with an ELCS. But honestly, I'm not bothered if I do have ELCS if I don't go into labour. I had EMCS last time and it was fine afterwards, it was everything that came before that was the nightmare. So I wouldn't feel too nervous having ELCS. I managed to bond, breastfeed, move around. I was horribly anaemic, but I don't think that would have happened with an ELCS, it was the emergency nature of it. And I was scared to go out, but I don't think that was due to pain etc, it was just first time mum nerves. I don't feel like I 'need' to have a natural birth, just that I will potentially heal faster so I want to try. But yeah, I totally get where you're coming from.

 

[babe2ooo]

I had an emergency c-section with my first and I really wouldn't want that again. If I have to it doesn't bother me but I found recovery really hard. I don't feel the bond would be any different I just don't want to have to go through another recovery like I did with a c section.

 

[LadySlipper]

My first was an emcs due to failure to progress and baby heart rate dropping a little with pitocen. This time I opted for an elcs as I am once again considered high risk (advanced maternal age and high bmi). Though they still offered vbac. The risks were just too much for me. Also my hips/pelvis have been extremely sore this time around and I couldn't imagine trying a vaginal delivery feeling like it does. I, at first, was disappointed with my emcs but came to terms with it. This time I am completely at peace about my elcs choice. While csections are not ideal, I don't see them as evil or anything. It is merely an option available to us if it is wanted or needed. An absolute personal choice. So I am with you.

Eta I had no issues bonding or breast feeding either.

 

[Angelbaby_01]

With DD I had an elcs and will do the same this time again. With DD that ended up in Nicu the first 5 weeks I just like to have more "control" this time as well.

 

[ATC]

Yup, me!! I ended up with an emcs last time after reaching full dilatation and pushing for some time. When things went wrong they did so without any warning and it was a very traumatic experience for myself and my oh. I didn't get to hold my baby for a long time afterwards and I felt very cheated. Unlike most other people commenting, bf didn't work out for me and it took me a long time to get over the experience.

This time my midwife and ob both said they would recommend a section and I was thrilled. It will allow me to plan to have my son cared for and I'm hoping the birth will be a lot less traumatic. I am 100% happy with the decision and anyone who feels it makes me less of a mum can sod off!

 

[Ashersmomma]

I had a last minute elcs with my first. When we got close to my due date, he was estimated to be extremely large, and refused to drop, plus a couple other factors. I was given the choice of induction or C-section(C-section being highly recommended) I actually always wondered if I would follow in my family's footsteps, or if I would have the first natural birth since my grandma gave birth. (If I remember correctly, there have been 16 C-sections in my family, just on my mother's side) Guess I followed in their footsteps.
This time around I had considered a VBAC, but that unfortunately is not in the cards for me. I'm considered high risk because of my BMI, plus I now have cervical scarring that would cause issues. I'm just fine with it. I actually had a very good recovery with my last C-section. I heal quickly and have a high pain tolerance. And I think this time around will be even easier, as I will have my family close by to help out if I need. Last time I lived about 45 miles away from my parents, and now I'm back in my home town and they are just a mile away, as well as my aunt, grandparents, and several close cousins

 

[MarieMo7]

I am trying for a vbac but harbor no hard feelings for my first section. It was an amazing experience and I have a kick-ass daughter to show for it. Having surgery with a toddler in tow is what makes me nervous, but if I end up with a RCS I'm okay with that too. Due date is Nov 19, scheduled section on Nov 24 (40+5) if she doesn't come on her own!

 

[Katrina18]

Yep! Had a c section first time around after 36 hours of labor and failure to progress past 7 cm (my cervix had started to swell)..I was really upset about it for a long time because I felt like having a c section meant I was a failure of some sort. My doctor gave me the option this time, but did state that since I am having them close together (18 months), that there is an ever so slight chance of my uterus bursting (1% chance). I feel more comfortable with a c section this time around and a lot more prepared as I was completely unprepared the first time around. Also, it leaves me time to plan out who will watch our daughter while we go to the hospital as we have no family in the area. I am perfectly fine with it this time around. I definitely do not look down on anyone wanting to try a VBAC at all. It had definitely crossed my mind, but I determined it's just not for me. However, I've had some not so positive responses from people thinking that I'm doing the wrong thing. Oh well.

 

[Gym knickers]

So glad im not the only one who feels this way! I definitely feel judged by some people around me but I've got to do what's best for my baby and my family and I feel like I've made the right decision. My baby keeps turning oblique and is at the moment. I've never had a head down baby for more than a few days. I will also struggle with childcare as I'm due so close to Christmas and DH's job are putting pressure on him. I'm worried about having to have an emcs and not being there for my daughter over Christmas or something going wrong. My DH has had a very traumatic birth in his family with a long term impact and he has lots of issues regarding the birth. I know that an elcs is best for my family and I'm at peace with my decision although I have lots of respect for everyone's individual circumstances. Glad to know others feel the same!

 

[madseasons]

I wanted a VBAC only because I had an EMCS the first time around, after pushing for two hours and having the primal feeling of wanting to just have him naturally (no epirdual at that point; it was turned off at 7cm) SO this time around, I know what to expect and my high threshold for pain, so I wanted to do it naturally again and have a VBAC. I also had to heal twice last time due to an infection inside my uterus (thank you midwife!)

Well the hospital I am going to is no longer allowing VBAC's so my OBGYN wants me to schedule my c-section for 39 weeks. On Nov 19th Ill know when I am going in to have my baby. To knock out two-birds-with-one-stone I am getting a Tubal at the same time. SOOO I guess it's okay since I don't have to go back to have another procedure done again, I can do it all at once.

I have come to terms with it and am glad that I get to PLAN the birthday and know when she will be here for maternity leave purposes and it also helps my coverage here at work to know when Ill be out and coming back.....


Dee

 

[SoBlessedMama]

I feel the same as you. : ) I had a c-section 4.5 years ago with DS#1, due to my BP shooting way up the last two weeks, he stopped moving as he should have, and he was estimated to be very large. I've never regretted it, or harbored any negative feelings, as I have an awesome, healthy kid now. Actually, my hospital (and the surrounding hospitals as well) don't even allow/recommend VBACs. So, I had a repeat section 2.5 weeks ago with DS#2. It was an even more positive experience and an even easier recovery. I don't regret it at all, and I don't feel like I "missed out" by not having a vaginal birth. Its nice to hear about others who feel positively about c-sections, because so many women have such a hard time coming to terms with it. I hope everything goes well with your upcoming LOs arrival!! : )

 

[maisie78]

I'm having an elcs after an emcs with dd. 48 hours from waters going until my section and I only got to 4cm, Dd's heart rate was dropping. I never felt bad about the section and recovered well. I wasn't able to bf and so ee for 6 months which was far from ideal. For me the decision for an elcs this time was an easy one. Dd lost her sight at 7 months old but the process started shortly after her birth. Her ophthalmic consultant has never been able to say 100% that the long labour and decreased HB did not contribute to her losing her sight so quickly. Without these problems we may have had a chance of at least saving some of her sight. I have no reason to believe that there will be anything wrong with ds as he is incredibly unlikely to have the same condition as dd but just the thought is enough to make me adamant that I will not risk a VBAC. I am actually looking forward to having a nice relaxing birth this time without all the drama of my emcs.