anyone had a de-briefing ?????

[emiliasmummy]

hi ladies ,

im going for a de-briefing at hospital in 2 weeks cause i had a traumtic birth and was wondering if anyone been for 1 and what i can expect and if it helped ect .... did post in post-natal section but no one seems to know what one is .

im in the northeast so not sure if its just up here that do them .

thanks ladies x

 

[vickie83]

I had one, it helped in a way because it got me talking about it but I did kind of feel like I was fobbed off and it was just business as usual for them "you're alright, your baby is alright, what's the problem?" Maybe in hindsight I should have waited til I was more emotionally ready to deal with it and ask questions. Hope it helps you

 

[emiliasmummy]

yer i kinda had a feeling it was going to be clinical just want to stop anyone else going through the same thing if u know what i mean probs wont make a difference but i just want to try .... im hoping it will easy a few of my feelings about it all .... can i ask if u went for councilling about your birth and if so did u find that helpful xx

 

[amy19604]

Sorry i cant really help, they said someone would talk to me about my birth but no one ever did, and i didnt think to ask, i just wanted to get home. i dont think it would of helped anyway as i spoke to family about it then tried to put it behind me cos everytime i thought or talked about it i felt sick and panicky so it wasnt good for me to keep going over it at the time.
Hope it helps you though x

 

[vickie83]

yer i kinda had a feeling it was going to be clinical just want to stop anyone else going through the same thing if u know what i mean probs wont make a difference but i just want to try .... im hoping it will easy a few of my feelings about it all .... can i ask if u went for councilling about your birth and if so did u find that helpful xx

I did No chance I'd be doing it again any day now if I hadn't! Google birth trauma association, you might find their website helpful

 

[Tiny]

I had a debrief about a month after I had my LO. It was with the Head of the Maternity Department at the hospital, (she is also a trained midwife). Basically she came to my home with my hospital notes. She reviewed the notes with me and explained what had happened during my birth; she also answered all the questions that I had.

To get the most from your meeting I would suggest that you think about the questions you would like answered, write these down and take them with you to the meeting. Take someone along with you, if you feel that you need the support. (I was quite fragile and worried that I would start to cry and not be able stop!) I would also recommend that you arrange for someone to look after your LO, so that you can concentrate soley on the meeting.

Overall I found the experience to be very positive. It ended with her telling me to get in contact with her should I get pregnant again, so they she could make sure my experience was more positive next time, (shame I am moving out of the area)!

Hope you get as much out of the debrief as I did!

 

[emiliasmummy]

thanks ladies thats really helped really hoping things get anwsered and make feel like maybe one day i could have another little lo xx

 

[beatnick]

yes and it really sorted my head out.

i feel much less embarrassed about the amount of fuss i made (discovered i dialted about 5cm in an hour... ouch!)

would highly reccomend it.

 

[HayleyJA]

I had one. For me it was a positive experience, and I'd highly recommend doing it if you have any questions, comments, queries, or even just want to give feedback about your birth experience.

I had a few questions, quite a bit of feedback I wanted to give (not serious enough to say they were 'complaints') and also I think just talking through the experience with someone who wasn't either emotionally or professionally involved, yet who still had a professional understanding, was very helpful.

I wrote about the meeting in some detail in my parenting journal here and my original birth story which will kind of set the scene as to what my questions were (if you're interested) is here.

Hope this helps!

 

[lozzy21]

I had what they called a debrief but id have called it a follow up. They had a flick through my notes and said i will be watched more closely next time, i wont need a section but they dont want me to have a homebirth or go to the birth centre. They dident go through my notes with me and there was no mention of how i was doing emotionaly.

 

[emiliasmummy]

thanks ladies the thing with my birth was it was all going great 30hrs and no drugs til epi at 25hrs in then after an hour of pushing my midwife left and came back with 8 other professionals and before i knew it i had my legs up in stir-ups been cut and my little lo dragged out by forceps the whole time i was screaming for them to stop no one spoke to me and told me what was happening .... then i passed out for blood loss {my poor hubby } and missed the whole getting to hold lo and bond .... then when stitched up everyone left with no word of what the hell had just happened .

i guess i just want some one to be held accountable ,no-one i beleive should be treat like meat on a butchers table anyways hopefully the de-briefing will help ..... can i ask if any of you ladies have tried councilling for your births and if that helped ??? xx

 

[Mel+Bump]

Im so sorry you had to go through that, like you say, noone should have to go through that.

Im speaking with my HV tomorrow about talking to someone about my birth and getting in contact with a councillor. I know someone who has had councilling and it has been a massive help. She brought to my attention postnatal post traumatic stress, so Ill be mentioning it tomorrow. I had the same experience in regards to a midwife being there, not talking to us, and then all of a sudden alot of people running in, giving me an oxygen mask and rushing me to theater. The last 2 hours of my labour were just a massive blur and I really have very little idea of what happened.

 

[lozzy21]

Iv been refered for counselling but im still waiting

 

[Mel+Bump]

Iv been refered for counselling but im still waiting

That doesn't give me much hope....

I find out next Tuesday the course of action. But counselling was mentioned as part of it.