Applying for Catholic school for DS but he isn't christened......

[Louise88]

My DD goes to a Catholic school but she was christened as a baby in my opinion it's the best school and then links onto a good high school aswell my DS wasn't christened not sure why but it just didn't seem to get booked when he was a baby. I would like him to go to the same school as his sister but not sure if he will get accepted or not. I have ended up booking to get him christened early next year but it's causing alot of arguments and fall outs as his dad isn't attending (his choice) as he lives 6 hrs away but I'm getting screamed at by him as people are ringing him havinga go at him for not attending and then their ringing me telling me how disgusted they are that he's not attending etc. To the point I want to cancel the christening and just hope he gets into the school.

Do you think he'd stand a chance at getting in without being christened especially with his sister being in the school? I have also thought about maybe telling everyone the christening is cancelled and just having the godparents attend but not sure how the prest would feel having an empty church

Hope all the makes sense.

 

[crownest]

I think just attending with the godparents is a good idea , thats what I did as I didnt want a fuss. If you explained to the priest you are kerping it small because his dad cant come he should understand.

 

[Teri7489]

It's a big risk not having him christened so I'd definitely go ahead with that. They are usually full and those who aren't baptised are considered last so it will be who applied first that gets the place as I'm sure you are aware, him having a sibling there might help but it's up to the school board not the head teacher.

If it's causing a lot of stress I'd go with what you say. The priest doesn't need to know how big a family you have. As far as he will know you only have 2/3/4 members in the family. Some people it's like that. He won't judge you. It's only for the sake of getting in to school so it's not a big deal.

 

[Louise88]

Thankyou for the replies I think I am just going to stick with close family and godparents and not involve friends etc. As it shouldn't have to be made into a stressful event. I deffinatly want him christened as really don't want to risk him going to the other schools (going off ofstead reports etc.) As I don't necessarily live in a great area so his school is really important to me.

 

[_Meep_]

I wasn't christened and none of my family, including myself, even really believes in God, but I went to a Catholic secondary school. It was considered a good school, which I suppose is the only reason I was sent there. The faith factor was not an aspect in my attending. It was a private school, so I don't know if that makes a difference in being accepted? However, I attended on a 50% fee reduction academic scholarship, so me not being christened didn't seem to affect their decision there either - there were only two scholarship places for maximum discount to be won per year so presumably they would have been quite picky and could have chosen someone with a religious background, but as I recall, it never even came up during my interview with the headmaster.

 

[Rags]

It's a big risk not having him christened so I'd definitely go ahead with that. They are usually full and those who aren't baptised are considered last so it will be who applied first that gets the place as I'm sure you are aware, him having a sibling there might help but it's up to the school board not the head teacher.

If it's causing a lot of stress I'd go with what you say. The priest doesn't need to know how big a family you have. As far as he will know you only have 2/3/4 members in the family. Some people it's like that. He won't judge you. It's only for the sake of getting in to school so it's not a big deal.

I'm sorry you've got this dilemma. My son goes to the local catholic school even though he is not baptised - in Scotland you can't discriminate against a child for schooling, as long as they are in the catchment area they will be allocated a place. They can say no to placement requests from outside the area on religious grounds though and we had several catholic children have placement request turned down this year when a couple of non catholic children from the area were admitted.

Personally, even though I have no religious beliefs, if I thought not being christened would effect my child's chances I'd probably go away quietly and have it done. I'm sure your local priest would happily do this for you if he felt you genuinely wanted your Ds raised within that faith.

Good luck with whatever you decide and I'm sorry this is causing problems for you and your Ds's father.

 

[Smanderson]

My son goes to a Catholic school and part of the criteria for applicants is being baptised. Maybe contact the school to ask? As for the dad, if he's making that choice he shouldn't be having a go at you that was his choice and he shouldn't be carrying on like that it's just not reasonable. Hope you get everything sorted xx

 

[george83]

Our local catholic school has it set that you have to be before you can attend. Every school has their own admissions policy so you should look at theirs to be sure. Most schools won’t accept a sibling as a high enough reason for automatic attendance especially at a highly rated school as parents try their best to get their first child in and then stop attending church etc as they feel they have their way in already (if that makes sense)

 

[c1403]

You should look at the admissions policy for your school. Some put the sibling link before faith, some the other way round.
Our local Catholic school takes a sibling already at the school as a priority but if they are leaving this year that won't count. X

 

[Skye82]

You should look at the admissions policy for your school. Some put the sibling link before faith, some the other way round.
Our local Catholic school takes a sibling already at the school as a priority but if they are leaving this year that won't count. X

I agree with this. I work at a catholic school and we don’t actually ask parents if their children are baptized. We’ve even had children baptized in the school chapel because they ve decided that’s what they want later on.

I would say though that you might run into problems further down the line when it’s time for first communion etc.

At my sons christenings we were only 6 people. Us, the godparents and my husbands parents. The priest doesn’t care who is there, honestly. For them, the baptism should be the most important thing.

 

[amytrisha]

Chances are as his sibling is there he’s got a very good chance.
Here it goes in this order of priority:

Catholic children with siblings present
Catholic children no siblings
Non Catholic children with siblings present
Non catholic children.
( then ofc children in care etc are high priority )

Both schools I’ve applied for Finley are catholic, he isn’t. I am but his father isn’t and I felt considering I haven’t been to church since my mother passed away 14 years ago it’d be immoral and hypocrital for me to get him christened as it’d be purely for a school place, I know I wouldn’t take him to church.
I’m sure he’ll get into one of those, though, as I’m sure they have to take x amount of children that aren’t religious or are of different religions? Plus the fact his sibling is there really boosts him up the list.
Good luck x

 

[MrsPear]

Is the school oversubscribed? My daughter is in Catholic school but we aren't religious. The school was undersubscribed. If you look at previous years you may be able to see how many applied versus how many got in, and as others have said you can also see the priority criteria.