approx day 1702 of out TTC journey

[Mump_hopeful]

from a very glum PCOS hostage

hiya ladies and gents,

feeling a little deflated today i need to talk to people in the same/simular situtation to me and my husband we started to ttc May of 2008 but as of yet we have had no possitive outcome

we have seen 3 gyno doctors in 3 different hospitals and all refuse to help untill i take control of my BMI its currently 35. i have been on slimming world since Jan 2009 and i have yoyo'd since starting my consultant has said im not doing anything wrong it just isnt the diet for my body - so tried WW but where i have followed SW for sooo long i could get the jist of WW.

i love xmas but this xmas has been horrible - everyone i know is either having a baby anytime now... found out what there having... or have made their announcements - as happy as i am for them its utterly gut renching.

my husband came home today with information about going private - but im very concern about the cost - i mean why should i hav to pay to have a baby when there are kids having kids (i must stop ranting)

im very sorry this post is very doom and gloom i suppose i just need a buddy to help me, my husband is ok but doesnt understand how i feel (well thats what i think either that or hes scared that he'd upset me).

is there anything i can do that isnt down to weight - with out being rude there are women alot larger than me getting pregnant!

love to you all though x

 

[rihanna]

Don't know what to day apart from send hugs :0(

 

[Mump_hopeful]

thanks love i dont think i anything can be said i think i just need to vent!!! thank you though xx

 

[rihanna]

;0) your not alone x

 

[xxshellsxx]

I know the feeling only too well - i'm currently at slimming world to get my BMI down to 35 (35 is the highest our trust will accept) it's down from 41 to 37.4 in 8 weeks, so i'm getting there!

I don't have PCOS but i know the struggle to lose weight to get treatment others get for free! I also know women a lot larger than me who fall at the drop of a hat, but because i need assistance from a health trust i pay my taxes into i have to jump through hoops to get it! Makes me so mad!

Also because my DH has 2 kids from a previous relationship i am no longer entitled to the 2 free IVF treatments i would have got with my EX had they not made me wait til i was 30 to get... which in turn caused our relationship to break down.

Sorry i've ranted that wasn't my intention - just wanted to let you know your not alone!

I lost weight previously (while waiting to turn 30 for IVF) with rosemary connely GI diet - might be worth trying that one if you haven't already x

 

[Mump_hopeful]

thanks ladies

shells iv been googling since writing that post and RC diet keeps coming up so i might just try it.

thet thing that hurts the most is that i feel im failing as a female (sounds so stupid but thats exactly how i feel) its def causing strain on my marrage of 18months.

sometimes i get myself so wound up that i go to my GP/GYNO ready for a fight and egar to get the results i want/deserve as a female but as soon as i step in that room i cave in and become this weak little mouse that takes every word as gospal and becomes the type that replys with "yes doctor, no doctor, dont worry then doctor"

lets carry on hoping and dreaming xx

 

[xxshellsxx]

I felt like that for a very long time, depression crept in and babies ruled my life! Eventually i found peace with my situation after about 5 years and it no longer controlled my every move.

I was also a 'yes dr' girl.... not anymore! I want facts figures and don't leave without an explanation and a plan of what is next!

My life has a different direction now, i have career goals and i know what my life will be like if it never happens for me and it's not because of DH's kids - i see them maybe twice a year so it's not like they are part of my life even though i would love them to be (his psychotic ex).

for me which ever path my life takes i'll be happy with what i've got - but i will still give 100% of what i have to become a mother.

I hope one day you can find that peace within yourself and stop feeling like you've failed xx