Arghhhhhhhh!!

[Little G]

Arggghh, well ladies looks as if DF And I have put TTC on hold indefinatly for the time being... We were meant to be trying from beginning of Jan but when I brought it up into conversation again he said ' I think we should hang off for another few month's' ..... eh?
Honestly I dont get Men!!! He spent most of the night at a New Years Party cooing over a 6 month old baby!
His argument being he doesn't think we are ready to have one yet as we first thought...? Im 33 and he's 32. To be make matters worse it looks as though
my job could be in jeopardy, my company are possibly considering relocating the department I work in to another branch! So If I get made redundant who knows when we will be able to TTC! sorry for the long rant just had to get this off my chest as Ive not spoken to anyone else about it and was so looking forward to TTC!

 

[kittylady]

I'm sorry to hear that hun I hope it's just a phase and he changes his mind asap

 

[Amygdala]

He's probably just scared because it's getting real now. Have you spoken to him about all the issues that start coming up in your mid-30s like reduced fertility and increased chances of miscarrying and disabilities? Maybe that might convince him that if you are going to have kids, now really is the time. Especially if you're planning more than one. Good luck with it!

 

[Little G]

He's probably just scared because it's getting real now. Have you spoken to him about all the issues that start coming up in your mid-30s like reduced fertility and increased chances of miscarrying and disabilities? Maybe that might convince him that if you are going to have kids, now really is the time. Especially if you're planning more than one. Good luck with it!

Yeah we spoke about not leaving it much longer as it might create complications, I think it's probably because for the past ten years we have been pretty much do what we want when we want and he said one of the reasons is the lifestyle we have at the moment would obviously change, i don't have a problem with that at all but as you said I think he's scared at the thought of it, Im scared/excited too but its still something i want. I dont know when to bring it up in conversation again encase I get shot down in flames again! ....

 

[Baby Love]

Aww I hope he comes around soon. My OH wants to wait a few months and I want to TTC now! So I know how you feel...Good luck!

 

[GirlBlue]

Yeah, I am sure he will come around. Babies change your life, but I don't think they have to be the end of it. It's just a new adventure...lots of kid friendly vacations...

 

[lovehearts]

Yeah, I am sure he will come around. Babies change your life, but I don't think they have to be the end of it. It's just a new adventure...lots of kid friendly vacations...

i totally agree

 

[Baby Love]

I can only think that a baby enriches a couple's life - it adds a completely new dimension! It is the most amazing thing in the world

 

[Bmary83]

Oh i know how u feel, I am in the exact same situation only OH wants to wait another 3.5 years! Given that he already agreed to try in jan, another few months wont hurt but if then, he says the same thing I think its time you sit him down n be firm, explain to him how much it means to you n how much it hurts to be told no. Hope it works out for u. Good luck.

 

[Little G]

Oh i know how u feel, I am in the exact same situation only OH wants to wait another 3.5 years! Given that he already agreed to try in jan, another few months wont hurt but if then, he says the same thing I think its time you sit him down n be firm, explain to him how much it means to you n how much it hurts to be told no. Hope it works out for u. Good luck.

Yeah think will need to have a chat again soon, time is slowly ticking past, it feels as if we need something else in our life now and i'm totally ready to try.
My friend said a true thing the other night if you WTT it makes you think about if you can afford it etc, sometimes it better just to go for it and not think about it too much. Just wish we had done that now when he had initially said yes, it was my idea to wait until January!

 

[Baby Love]

Oh i know how u feel, I am in the exact same situation only OH wants to wait another 3.5 years! Given that he already agreed to try in jan, another few months wont hurt but if then, he says the same thing I think its time you sit him down n be firm, explain to him how much it means to you n how much it hurts to be told no. Hope it works out for u. Good luck.

Yeah think will need to have a chat again soon, time is slowly ticking past, it feels as if we need something else in our life now and i'm totally ready to try.
My friend said a true thing the other night if you WTT it makes you think about if you can afford it etc, sometimes it better just to go for it and not think about it too much. Just wish we had done that now when he had initially said yes, it was my idea to wait until January!

I agree with you, Little G...sometimes it's better to take the plunge, because we're built to cope with things, and to be resourceful when we need to. I'm the kind of person who follows my heart; i guess that's why I'm finding it so hard to WTT when it feels like it would be right to TTC now

 

[Little G]

Yeah I feel the same way baby love, who's to say it would happen right away anyway ( hopefully it would but you never know) Said this to him as well and he was like 'yeah but it could happen after the 1st time!' My BFF is TTC her 2nd just now and my SIL is pregnant with her 2nd which is making waiting that little bit harder!

 

[Baby Love]

Yeah I feel the same way baby love, who's to say it would happen right away anyway ( hopefully it would but you never know) Said this to him as well and he was like 'yeah but it could happen after the 1st time!' My BFF is TTC her 2nd just now and my SIL is pregnant with her 2nd which is making waiting that little bit harder!

I know, sometimes it just feels like everyone's having babies except us! I'm sure your OH will come around soon.

 

[cleckner04]

I wish I could offer some amazing advice that could make you feel better but I can't. Men just suck sometimes. FX'ed he comes around to the idea again. Sounds like a case of cold feet to me.

 

[lu-is]

I think some people get scared when it comes to the time to TTC because they've gotten set in their ways and a baby will shake things up. Whether that means he can't always go for a beer with the guys, or you can't just up and take off on a vacation together, or you just might be too exhausted to do anything. People are scared of change -except for those who are really really really wanting a baby I guess, lol or we are scared but our desire over powers that fear.
I wouldn't pester him about it over and over but definetly bring it up again next month if you two don't talk about it sooner.

The part I find difficult too is trying to figure out how frequently to bring up the topic of children and getting pregnant. I know my DH gets a little panicked whenever I bring it up, but we did have a real good conversation about it this weekend (not that a timeline was decided yet, but we're getting closer).

 

[Baby Love]

I think some people get scared when it comes to the time to TTC because they've gotten set in their ways and a baby will shake things up. Whether that means he can't always go for a beer with the guys, or you can't just up and take off on a vacation together, or you just might be too exhausted to do anything. People are scared of change -except for those who are really really really wanting a baby I guess, lol or we are scared but our desire over powers that fear.
I wouldn't pester him about it over and over but definetly bring it up again next month if you two don't talk about it sooner.

The part I find difficult too is trying to figure out how frequently to bring up the topic of children and getting pregnant. I know my DH gets a little panicked whenever I bring it up, but we did have a real good conversation about it this weekend (not that a timeline was decided yet, but we're getting closer).

I think you're right, lu-is; people get comfortable in a certain routine and then they're scared to change it in case it doesn't work...

I'm excited for you that you've come closer to making a timeline!

 

[Little G]

I think some people get scared when it comes to the time to TTC because they've gotten set in their ways and a baby will shake things up. Whether that means he can't always go for a beer with the guys, or you can't just up and take off on a vacation together, or you just might be too exhausted to do anything. People are scared of change -except for those who are really really really wanting a baby I guess, lol or we are scared but our desire over powers that fear.
I wouldn't pester him about it over and over but definetly bring it up again next month if you two don't talk about it sooner.

The part I find difficult too is trying to figure out how frequently to bring up the topic of children and getting pregnant. I know my DH gets a little panicked whenever I bring it up, but we did have a real good conversation about it this weekend (not that a timeline was decided yet, but we're getting closer).

Yeah think your right in not pestering him over it, think will wait as you said and bring it up again when the time is right, Glad you getting closer to setting a TTC date!

xxx

 

[Bmary83]

Yeah, glad u getting closer to a TTC date Lu is! Must admit i'm a teansy bit jealous! Fingers crossed 4 u tho.

 

[Bmary83]

Aldo Little G, how do u get the balance right between pestering n not? x

 

[Little G]

Aldo Little G, how do u get the balance right between pestering n not? x

Know what you mean, think i'll probably wait a few weeks till we're having a nice wee night in together having a couple of drinks then bring it up into conversation .Fingers crossed he'll maybe come around again, his sis is due in May so i'm kinda hoping that will make him broody!