Ashamed??

[TashaAndBump]

I don't know what is causing this... I never felt it before I was always proud of my little girl but lately I just keep feeling like this and I don't like it Whenever I see people that haven't seen my for years or people ask me how old I am. or even just filling out forms that ask for Anna's DOB and my own... I feel embarrassed! And I don't know why! Anna is the best thing I ever did! She has turned my life around and improved it 100% for the better!

Right now I feel guilty that I could ever feel ashamed of Anna - but it's not her I am ashamed of, it is me and I don't know why because I KNOW I should be proud - of Anna she is so perfect... My LIFE is so perfect now because of her... Yet I can't help this - I feel so embarrassed and ashamed that I got pregnant so young and all my plans got put aside... What's so bad about that?! I don't even know! I am fulfilling those plans now and it is better because I am doing it with my husband by my side, in our own home, and with a daughter to show for all I have done and that is something to be proud of more than any qualification or achievement ... right?!

Any ideas why I feel like this??

I feel lousy

 

[princessttc]

ohhhh honey dont feel like this
Your doing and have done a great job at looking after ur daughter and i think that shows more about u and the incredible person u are than u know

I dont know why u r feeling like this, but i go through stages too, im sure it will pass!!!

 

[Serene123]

Judgement is what's wrong with this world and what makes people feel like this. You're doing/have done a great job Tasha x

 

[sam's mum]

Sorry you're feeling so bad. I have no idea why you're feeling that way, but you're right that you should be proud that you have achieved everything that you have - you have nothing to be ashamed of x

 

[nikky0907]

I personally don't think you are ashamed. I know I am certainly not ashamed of Lola, she's so perfect and I love my life with her but still I get a bit of an uneasy feeling whenever I meet someone from uni I haven't seen in a while and they ask whether Lola (in her stroller) is mine.
It's because I feel like they think and talk behind my back how I ruined my life and whatnot all those clueless people think... It's so stigmatized in today's society that you just can't help it.

I was at the dentist the other day and had Lola with me, the nurse came out and asked how old I was (something to do with insurance purposes) and I honestly felt bad saying 19. When I did I went sooo red, I just imagined all these people in the waiting room, looking at me, rolling their eyes on the inside.

Just like you, I'm still working on the same plans I had, I take great care of her, love her and I am happy.
But I think society is pressuring us that we need to be ashamed and thats what I think you're feeling.
I hope you made sense of this

 

[Jkelmum]

I still get uneasy when people realise jakes 13 and i am only 27 but i dont think ashamed is the right word the judgemental people of this is world is how what makes us feel the way we do ! xxx

 

[heather91]

I think it's natural to feel that way because teenage pregnancy is stigmatized as nikky rightly put. I saw a few teachers from when I was at school and I covered my bump and I felt so awful for doing it afterwards so I understand how you feel (I assume it feels similar). I told my mom about it and as she said, it's other people that have the problem, not us! I'm sure you're a great mom and you should feel proud of everything you have achieved and hold your head up high. x

 

[Rach276]

Being a Mum is the hardest job ever Tasha, you shouldnt be ashamed, your amazing. I always look for your advice on threads becuase you seem to know everything

Your still young huni and have ages left to carry on with your plans, your life is just made better becuase you have an amazing little girl to share it with.

I really really admire you. I hope I dont sound like a stalker

Dont ever feel ashamed because you have nothing to feel ashamed about!
xx

 

[sleepinbeauty]

Don't pay attention to them. Like a few of the ladies already said: THEY have a problem, not you.

 

[TashaAndBump]

I personally don't think you are ashamed. I know I am certainly not ashamed of Lola, she's so perfect and I love my life with her but still I get a bit of an uneasy feeling whenever I meet someone from uni I haven't seen in a while and they ask whether Lola (in her stroller) is mine.
It's because I feel like they think and talk behind my back how I ruined my life and whatnot all those clueless people think... It's so stigmatized in today's society that you just can't help it.

I was at the dentist the other day and had Lola with me, the nurse came out and asked how old I was (something to do with insurance purposes) and I honestly felt bad saying 19. When I did I went sooo red, I just imagined all these people in the waiting room, looking at me, rolling their eyes on the inside.

Just like you, I'm still working on the same plans I had, I take great care of her, love her and I am happy.
But I think society is pressuring us that we need to be ashamed and thats what I think you're feeling.
I hope you made sense of this

I think you have hit the nail on the head there!

Thanks girls

 

[TashaAndBump]

Being a Mum is the hardest job ever Tasha, you shouldnt be ashamed, your amazing. I always look for your advice on threads becuase you seem to know everything

Your still young huni and have ages left to carry on with your plans, your life is just made better becuase you have an amazing little girl to share it with.

I really really admire you. I hope I dont sound like a stalker

Dont ever feel ashamed because you have nothing to feel ashamed about!
xx

Aww Thanks hunni!

 

[aidensxmomma]

I know how you're feeling. I feel the same way because I'm pregnant with my second baby and I'm 17 years old. I love my son more than anything and I love the little unborn one too but sometimes people make me feel so bad. Until everyone found out about me being pregnant, I was sooooo excited and so happy, even though it was a bad time, I knew things would work out. Now, because of some people's reactions (not my or my OH's parents) I just feel like I can't be happy about it. It's a horrible feeling. Being from a small town, I know what people think when they look at me. I don't talk to most the people I did before because of having my son. And when people hear about me being pregnant again, I know that they think I'm a slut or something. The thing they don't think of is that both my kids have the same daddy and we're gonna get married shortly after baby #2 is born. So big for you because I know exactly how you feel.

 

[Beth_18]

hope you feel better soon as you have nothing to be ashamed of you are a your little girls everyfin and thats all that counts hun x x x

 

[tasha41]

I agree with nikky.. that's how I feel sometimes. I never felt it before but the past couple of weeks it has really hit me. First it was this twat at the lab who asked me what my DOB was and then still asked me.. how old are you? And double checked with me that I was actually getting a gestational diabetes test!! Then last night I ran into work to pick something up, I went to the hospital and left some of my things there cause I had to leave quickly, and some trashy girl said something about being pregnant as I passed by her.. took a lot of restraint not to turn around and say something or do something to her!!

I didn't do anything wrong in getting pregnant, so I f*cking hate when people decide it's alright to treat me or talk about me as if I've done something bad. I'm an adult, and tons of people have kids when they're 19.. my friends had moms who had them at 19 and I didn't think any differently of their mothers than I did of my own? Still respected them and was polite, etc. toward them.. my mom still talked to them, etc. Argh.

 

[Leanne&Bump..x]

I think it is digusting how young people are made to feel.
I get funny looks all the time when i go out with my son, but you know what fuck them!

You are doing a brilliant job, with the best reward ever. Like others its not us with the problem its them!
x

 

[Always&4ever]

I agree with Toria hon, if there was less judgement young mums wouldn't be made to feel so much like shit! Your an amazing mummy