Autism?

[RaRalalala]

My daughter was 3 in May and I've had some concerns about her since before she was even a year old.

She was never one for eye contact until my mum commented on this and we both encouraged her to look at us - this has improved massively over the last year.
She also has what I would call 'OCD tendencies' in which she is very particular about certain things and if they aren't this way she goes into a meltdown of tears and tantrum, things like pj bottoms being an inch too short will make her go off on one so we have had to ditch them for nightdresses. She won't roll her sleeves up, she has to get dressed as soon as she's out of her bed etc.
She has night terrors - she's had these from about 9 months old if not before then but of course the HV brushed me off when I mentioned this and told me she was too young to have them. 2 and a half years later and she still has them.
Her communication skills are not 'the average' her speech isn't clear and she often speaks in her 'own language' but seems to know exactly what she is saying even though it's not an actual word. She doesn't always understand what you're saying to her. e.g 'Can you put that bag under the sink' results in a look of total confusion. But she understands other things.
Her nursery have voiced concerns and told us she doesn't play with other children, she can't express her emotions and we only are aware of them because we have become aware of how to tell how she's feeling.
I had a meeting with the HV last week and they were keen to dismiss me and her, they sat her down, made her do some puzzles then looked at me and told me 'no she's bright as a button' I never said she wasn't clever! I'm concerned about her social and communication skills!

I guess I'm just looking for mummies who are maybe in a similar situation or have been? Suggestions etc are very welcome as I'm feeling at a bit of a loss. The HV told me I will have 'months and months and months' to wait before she will be seen by a speech therapist or paediatrician, I am considering taking her privately but if I'm seeking for a possible diagnosis who do I need to see altogether to reach this?

Thanks so much for taking the time to read this and for any comments in advance!

 

[alibaba24]

Hi there at 3 my daughter was very much in her own bubble. Same as your child would not play or interact with others. I wasn't allowed to touch her toys or anything. Poor speech and language. She is now 5 start speech therapy age 4 which brought to light a language disorder poor receptive and expressive language. She showed many autistic traits as many 3 year olds do . particularly those with language issues.we done a bit of investigation into autism but it has become clear my daughters difficulties were stemming from poor understanding of the world around her and what people were saying to her. She's now 5 and doing great . we can have small conversations . she wants to play WITH me and others . other kids lke her now ! (Sad to say they didn't before) her attention span etc is improving. She starts school this summer

 

[Thurinius]

It's not necessarily autism. My son is four and we were recently given the official diagnosis of autism. There is such awareness of the condition now, health professionals are very geared up to it (are in the Uk?). It was the professionals here that spotted my sons asd and brought it up with us.
Having said that he had absolutely no speech at three so it was rather more clear cut and I understand that girls are less likely to be diagnosed.

 

[RaRalalala]

Hi there at 3 my daughter was very much in her own bubble. Same as your child would not play or interact with others. I wasn't allowed to touch her toys or anything. Poor speech and language. She is now 5 start speech therapy age 4 which brought to light a language disorder poor receptive and expressive language. She showed many autistic traits as many 3 year olds do . particularly those with language issues.we done a bit of investigation into autism but it has become clear my daughters difficulties were stemming from poor understanding of the world around her and what people were saying to her. She's now 5 and doing great . we can have small conversations . she wants to play WITH me and others . other kids lke her now ! (Sad to say they didn't before) her attention span etc is improving. She starts school this summer

Thanks for sharing!! The other kids don't play with her either and it's heart breaking for any parent to see. I'm glad to hear that there is improvement, it keeps me from being all doom and gloom as I worry so much, especially in regards to when she starts school.

 

[alibaba24]

It really is amazing how fast they can progress last year my DD was nowhere near ready for school this year she is being described as so ready ! It's hard for us as parents to watch our kids on the outside. I got small shreds of comfort in knowing she wanted it that way though for that time period as a tip I would start working on her ability to follow instruction

 

[kneeswrites]

I just wanted to let you know to trust your instincts. Many autistic women go undiagnosed because the diagnostic criteria is sooo heavily geared towards male children. Tbh a lot of what you described sounds like autism, which isn't a bad thing at all, as long as you give her the support she needs. I am autistic and wasn't diagnosed until adulthood. I would definitely push for a speech evaluation or something like that because it can make a huge difference in a short amount of time. I have an autistic friend who has two autistic children and her daughter was only recently diagnosed at 3 after a TON of pressure on various doctors because they are sooo reluctant to diagnose girls for some reason. Now that she has the official diagnosis and can receive the assistance that she needs.

 

[AP]

Speech and language therapists should be able to determine whether her not her speech, language and understanding are at her age level or not. Their input is pretty vital in a ASD diagnosis (but only makes up a part of it, there is much more to it)
I would probably look towards getting an appointment with them as a first step. I don't think your HV has been helpful at all - if she is not willing to refer you it might be worth looking into self referal or seeing if a GP can help - don't take her word for it when it comes to waiting lists.

 

[momof2babies]

My son is the exact same except his eye contact got worse with age. He is now 5 and a half and he is looks almost like a typical developing child. He has been in therapy since he was 2. We got concerned about autism at 3. He was diagnosed at 4. . Structure is very helpful

 

[pinkpolkadot]

Hello! Your LO sounds like my LO in many ways. We noticed she was very particular with things relating to her clothes like you say. Her eye contact is not great amongst other things. Pre school noticed she struggles playing with the other kids, is quite inflexible and has some repetitive play and speech.

Fortunatley we have an excellent HV who referred us and assessment is now underway. Your HV should really have done a screening questionnaire with you so I would maybe see if you can see another HV or your GP about that