Baby Fever!

[sarahliz589]

I am just 21 years old, and i married my husband on January 2 2010. He is in the Marine Corps, and we have dealt with not an average amount of stress throughout our relationship. I almost died in a car accident that aws no fault of mine, and he left for boot camp while i was still in a unable to walk. We dated for a over a year when all this happened, and the next year i saw once every few months. Once he was stationed about a 10 hours away from home, he owuld make surprise trips on a friday night into the early hours of Saturday mornings, and leave by Sunday morning jsut to see me! I never asked he just showed up. We were engaged for a year and for 7 months of that year he was deployed to Afghanistan.

I moved to base with him, and now more then ever I have what i call "baby fever". a few of our friends have children, and my siblings are only 9 and 7. I practically raised them along with my single mother. I know what a child entails and how hard but rewarding a baby can really be. I want to have a baby so bad somedays, but I know we are not ready. As a couple we are not prepared for the amount of stress a child can bring. BUT I CAN'T SEEM TO HELP IT. i was JUST 21 on May 29th, and i feel like a clock is ticking. IS THIS NORMAL even though i am young??

 

[sarahliz589]

i forgot to add that my husbands is very sick with stage 4 cancer. Her health is a constant roller coaster, and i know my husband is praying that his mother can see her grandbabies. But he also does not want to rush into it. =/ I am just confused.

 

[sarahliz589]

MY GOSH I CANNOT YTPE!! LOL

(My husband's mother is sick)

 

[wannabeprego]

I am so sorry to hear about your accident. I am glad that you survived such a horrible ordeal.

You are young still and do have alot of time to have children but I can understand what you mean by having baby fever. For me I started to become more obsessed with having a baby in my late twenties and as I approached 30 my mind was made up, I wanted a child. My mother is older in her mid 70's and I really want her to be able to meet my child before she passes as well. So I understand wanting to have your MIL meet your child since she has an illness. I am so sorry to hear about her illness and hope that she will be with you guys for many more years to come.

It's a tuff decision when you are in your early twenties though because you have so many things that you may want to do before children come into the picture. I met my husband when I was 22 and the last thing on my mind was children at that time in my life. I was all about my career, traveling and having fun. Once kids come along you cant come and go as you please anymore, it can be a finacial strain and also a strain on your relationship.

I had goals that I wanted to reach before I wanted to start TTC, own a home, finish my bachelors degree and be financially stable. I have reached those goals and I am glad me and hubby waited until things got better before we made this decision.

It is ultimatley up to you though hun, you have to do what you think is best. If you havent yet, I do think you and your husband should sit down together and have a serious talk about having a child and figure out how the two of you will handle it together. Are you both really ready for the responsibility of a child??? I do think it is great that you have experience taking care of kids already and know what to expect. I think that helps alot!

Good Luck with whatever decision the two of you make.

 

[welshwarriors]

So sorry to hear about your accident....glad that you're doing ok now.

My husband in the british army and he got posted back to the UK when we started dating, I stayed behind in Germany. After a yr of flying back and forward and a 6 month tour in Iraq I moved to the UK and 2 long yrs later we got married and I moved to his posting....As soon as I had that ring on my finger and the keys to our marriage quarter in my pocket all I wanted was a baby. It's just normal (well at least over here) to have children as an army couple.
I think no couple is REALLY ready for the stress a baby brings into the relationship...I thought we were pretty tough as a couple after managing 2 deployments together, just seeing each other at weekend for over 3 yrs and Post traumatic stress disorder but nothing prepared us for our son.

 

[Lil Lady Bird]

I'm with you on the whole baby fever part. I'm 20 right now. My fiance and I are getting married at the end of July, then I'll turn 21 in November. After that's done with I plan to start TTC. Being "too young" doesn't seem like a reasonable excuse to not try. I just feel like there's a piece of me that's missing, and that's a baby. So I say go for what your soul tells you!