Bad situation,detailed info, would love opinions

[Simplechick]

Ok, so please don't judge me right off the bat. I have a serious question I'm hoping those more in the know about ovulation and conceiving and testing, can help answer.
I keep good tract of my actual periods, and watch my cervical mucus, but don't temp or use fertility predictor strips.

The long and short of it is, I'm very newly pregnant, but there are two possible fathers...(docs told me I couldn't conceive and both are tested clean)

So, my last period was 12/02/2015. I have 25-27day cycles on average, never longer than 27 (once this year).
I'm pretty sure my Luteal phase is 13-14 days (from what I could figure out online)

Sex dates were 12/14/2015 and 12/17/2015 (last one so late at night it was almost the next day, but that's a technicality)

It would seem the first guy would be prime candidate from what I've been able to gather, except he had TWO fertility docs tell him his sperm count is too low to impregnante anyone, and he has an ex wife (divorced 8 years ago) who he tried to impregnante for 2 years no success. (40 years old now)

Now, second candidate, has kids already. Is 55. No reason it couldn't be him, except the dates seem off...

Can I have ovulated that much later than my norm and could it be the second guy?? There is only a difference of a few days (again, please no judging, I make no excuses, but please be kind, I'm in a scary place right now)

Any links or opinions would be very much appreciated. Any technical info is great too..I love to read.

 

[Ltweety]

Oh my gosh, I feel terrible for you! First of all, congrats on your BFP! It's still a happy occasion no matter what!

Secondly, not coming from any place of judgement but are you in a serious relationship with either of these men, where you be able to comfortably tell him you are pregnant? Obviously, the second man would complicate the overall outcome, but I'm just looking for a place to start here...

You are definitely right that the first man seems the more likely candidate for timing but with his infertility issues that could make it difficult...However, if it was just low sperm count, that is not a stagnant number and can fluctuate considerably based on his lifestyle choices, vitamin supplements, etc...Also, his ex-wife's fertility would play a huge role in whether they were able to conceive or not...For example, if he had a below average sperm count, and she had poor cervical fluids, it could stop them from conceiving!

What day did you get your first positive test?

Also, in a couple weeks you may be able to test paternity if you are willing to ask for a dna sample...see the article below.

https://www.nytimes.com/2012/06/20/...ests-that-work-early-in-a-pregnancy.html?_r=0

 

[Simplechick]

Thank you so much for your reply! I'm still in a quandary..

I am in a relationship with one of them, but haven't told anyone about the preg yet. It's so early still and I have a history of early loss.

My first positive was on either dec 24 or 25. I wasn't late, but my boobs were swollen and I was exhausted...I had a bad suspicion I was preg because I've felt that way before when I was actively trying to conceive and did. If it matters, I used a first response pink line, 6 days early kind, and it was a pretty good line, really fast, within a minute or less. Also got a CB digital one, which I used on the 29th, and it said 2-3 weeks preg.

The first guy, the one with low sperm count/fertility issues spent two years with two different docs trying to conceive with his then wife. He said they did everything healthy, and that after their divorce, she went on to have a child within months of her new marriage, so she is fertile for sure... Docs said it was all pretty much on his end. I don't think he has no sperm at all, just not enough to get his ex pregnant after two years?? Seems impossible that one time with me and boom? (He hadn't had a sexual partner in over 7 years before him and I did it, if that makes any difference?)

I'm just trying to figure out how it could possibly be the second man... I know anything is possible with our bodies, but I've done every online calculator I can find, and unless I have a 9 day Luteal phase and a 25 day cycle (which I know I don't and never have), how could it be his?
I know I have my dates of intercourse right as well, but maybe I've missed something?

I'm sooo scared to try to move forward not knowing for sure, I mean, I don't care about the 8 months of not knowing because I know its mine, but for the men, that's a rough wait.

And thank you for the congrats!

 

[Ltweety]

So are you in a relationship with bachelor number one (12/14) or number 2 (12/17)? Is it serious? You could have O'd late and tested positive early...that would be the best chance for bachelor #2. But it can happen where someone can randomly impregnate. it only takes one viable sperm and one viable egg!
How are you feeling? Are your symptoms increasing?

I do understand about early loss, as you can see from my siggy. I would wait to say anything until you hear that first heartbeat. No need to jeopardize a relationship if you're happy in it...

 

[wish4baby]

I'm sorry about your predicament, I'm sure it will all work out for the best!

I recently read an article about this, but now I can't find it...I bet you could google it & find some info, if you want.
Anyways, it was scientific evidence supporting the idea that one is much more likely to fall pregnant by a man other than her partner. It had something to do with hormone levels for both the male & the female, when it's a new person versus someone you see often. It was actually really interesting!!
So, if I were placing a bet, unfortunately, I would have to bet on the "other" guy...

Also, as PP said, a low sperm count is just that...low...but it only takes 1! Could of just been perfect with y'all & unlucky for his ex, you know?

 

[wannabemomy37]

Congrats on bfp!

Unfortunately since it's only a matter of days between sex, it could easily be either. You'll have to wait and see.
I do think it's probably the 2nd guys tho since sperm can survive up to 7 days so if you ovulated late after first guy it would've been perfect for 2nd guy

 

[Simplechick]

So are you in a relationship with bachelor number one (12/14) or number 2 (12/17)? Is it serious? You could have O'd late and tested positive early...that would be the best chance for bachelor #2. But it can happen where someone can randomly impregnate. it only takes one viable sperm and one viable egg!
How are you feeling? Are your symptoms increasing?

I do understand about early loss, as you can see from my siggy. I would wait to say anything until you hear that first heartbeat. No need to jeopardize a relationship if you're happy in it...

Bachelor #2 is my main guy. And the one I'm hoping it belongs to.
I am hoping I ovulated late...but going by my dates and after checking my calendar, my first pregnancy test was positive (easily seen) within 6-7 days of when I had sex with the second guy (the one I'm hoping is father)
I'm feeling fine so far..slight upset tummy, but I don't usually get sick, just tired as time goes by.
Took a couple digi tests and they said 2-3 weeks, then the next day said 3+ weeks, so I'm assuming my hcg is going up. But that's nothing new for me even if I'm going to have an early loss. I've had a loss at 19 1/2 weeks, so I'm never confident.. (That one was possibly due to a doc giving me a med that wasn't the best choice for my particular body)

 

[Ltweety]

Well simple chick, 6-7 days after conception would be a VERY early positive since implantation can really only scientifically happen 6-7 days post ovulation. I'm afraid it doesn't look good for bachelor #2 in light of that fact. I really hope this all works out for you. Just stay healthy and focus on your little bean. Things have a way of falling into place when they are meant to be. Please feel free to message me or vent if you need to. I'm here for ya!

 

[5Miracles]

docs told me I couldn't conceive

Call me a Pollyanna, but when I read this, I was just so happy for you! Congratulations!

Listen, I'm no expert on this stuff either--but I do believe in miracles--that being said, I think gentleman #1 has just as much chance as gentleman #2. I know people who are on this earth after their dads had had vasectomies---I myself wasn't supposed to be here either once my mom was told after 4 losses at 38 that she'd "never" have kids!

Logically speaking, gentleman #2 sounds like he would have more of the chance since #1 did seem to have fertility issues before...but then again, despite medicine telling us that a man has to have a large scale sperm attack towards that egg in order to get it fertilized, in the end, it only takes 1...either way, that kiddo is determined to be here

I truly, truly hope all works out the way you want it to in the end...here are some BIGTIME virtual hugs for you!!!

 

[beemeck]

I think the best piece of info you have to go on is when you got your positive test, and I think the fact that it was only a week after the second encounter, even on an frer, that it is probably more likely the result of the first encounter.

I know it seems unlikely otherwise, but my friend got the surprise of her life when she went off the pill - her and her new husband eventually wanted kids but his previous marriage showed a lot of problems with infertility on both ends. They did eventually have one child, but my friend figured she at least had some time before it happened for them. The first month off the pill she was pregnant!

seems like fertility with men is a lot more fluid than it is with women.

but who knows? if encounter #1 is possible with all of those barriers, then perhaps encounter #2 is a possibility too!

wishing you tons of luck on your journey and a huge congrats on your bfp