Bothering FOB

[Maybe1daysoon]

Will I ever stop bothering the father of my son? I call or text him about everything LO does or happends even though I obviously know he doesnt care. Today was LO 6 week well baby check and I couldnt resist trying to tell him about it. He doesnt have time for LO because he is to busy with his friends... One of his good friends lives literally a block away and his truck is there half the time. Deep down I know if he cared about LO he would stop by or call but I just cant help trying to get him to care. It makes me seem so pathetic. I am desprite for him to want to spend time with LO. I know that I'm alone in this, it is time that I face it. I had an emergency and asked if LO could stay a few hours at his house... Year right. How do I stop informing/ bothering him. I feel sad that I can not provide my son with a father but I must get over it.

 

[lemontree12]

god, iv went the opposite way. in the last 3weeks iv been in hospital 3times with fears for my baby, not growing and premature labour. iv sat in the room crying listening to her heartbeat, dying to text and tell him, him rushing down and being equally as worried as me. but in my heart i know he doesnt care and texting will only make me angry with myself. i havent spoke to my fob in a month now. considering this is long as we were together 4yrs, texted eveyday when in work, and lived together. i find the easier it is for my own feelings.

mayb you should ask to meet up without lo and talk about how seriously he is about being a dad?

 

[jemmie1994]

i gave up texting FOB after he walked off on us when tried to meet him....if he wants anything now he has to make the first move,which he's only just starting to do
feel so much better knowing i have control of the situation now instead of running after him like i always used to do

 

[angelpkj]

you gotta delete his number till your over it-if u need get in touch etc give it ur mum but its doing your head no favours you having his number and he clearly doesnt care

 

[Dezireey]

You need to think of it as him being a man being harassed by his ex not an FOB being harassed by the Mother of his child. That is the way men see it and unfortunately they are just as stuck on their decision to NOT be a father as much as you are stuck on your decision to DEFINITELY be a mother. It is harsh, they are being unreasonable and wrong about the whole thing but they dont see it that way. Just do the opposite of what he expects now and disappear, no contact, nothing. You have done all you can for your baby to have a father but you really, truly cannot force a man to be a dad if he doesn't want to, just like a man cannot force a woman to have an abortion when she doesnt want to ( he sees things as conclusive as this) If you keep on at a man about any subject, he goes further and further into his cave. I leave my FOB alone and lo and behold he gets in touch with me, go figure? months of ignoring me and then once I ignore him, he gets curious. Not saying your FOB will ever get in touch but you must at least give him a chance. Right now all he feels is caged and hemmed in by the constant texts etc, give him all the space he needs and give yourself time to heal and think more clearly about things.

Hugs xx

 

[ZombieQueen]

I'm with you on this hun.. I send my FOB pictures of clothes and videos of belly dancing.. we were married for almost a year and a half now, but he met another woman and kicked me out full knowing I'd have to move back in with my parents in Hawaii.. and he didn't care. He doesn't seem to care when or if he will ever meet his daughter.. I wish he would care about her.. about me.. about our family. But everyday I see more and more how alone I am in this and how i need to leave him alone. I can't force him to care.. but its hard.. I hope we are able to move on soon