Can anyone help? Quite long..

[NewToThis_x]

Hey ladies,

Having alot of problems with my ex..We are currently living about 3 hours apart..me at my mums and him at his parents. He's basically told me if i dont move down there to his and get back with him (he dumped me in the first place mind u) Then im to never call or text him again..I lived at his for a few months but couldnt cope with his parents arguing, shouting, swearing, smoking which is why i moved home.
I dont really want to bring up the baby so far away from my own family either, i need there support..there a total contrast to his family. He's 23..acting 5!

His reasoning why i should move down there is 'cause he has all his support there and his job. Even though he might well be losing his job pretty soon as they are on monthly contracts 'til they close..something to do with property they are on.

I asked him if he'd move up here with me and i got "No way. Your just like your mum, no wonder your dad left" and "why should i change everything for u"..Even though a few months ago i left all my friends and my family to be with him down there?!

And i really would just like your thoughts on how i should deal with this..Am i being selfish by staying at my mums and getting myself a flat here?
Thanks x

 

[MummyMummy]

you're bothered about him because...?!

getting backtogether after splitting up isn't that simple at all and it's stupid to think itis.

he sounds like a complete and utter selfish shit.

him getting rid of you soundslike he did you a favour!!!

i'd stay weeeell away. without a doubt. focuson you and your lil baby!

xXx

 

[NewToThis_x]

you're bothered about him because...?!

getting backtogether after splitting up isn't that simple at all and it's stupid to think itis.

he sounds like a complete and utter selfish shit.

him getting rid of you soundslike he did you a favour!!!

i'd stay weeeell away. without a doubt. focuson you and your lil baby!

xXx

Thanks..im sure your right! I don't know why im bothered to be honest..Habit? If that makes sense..Hes very controlling and had me under thumb for the past two and a half years lol

 

[MummyMummy]

you sound like you'd be lots better without... if he was controlling then is he going to suddenly stop now? also, think of your baby is somebody controlling really a person you want around your baby?

think of just you two girlie, you will both do great!

xXx

 

[NewToThis_x]

you sound like you'd be lots better without... if he was controlling then is he going to suddenly stop now? also, think of your baby is somebody controlling really a person you want around your baby?

think of just you two girlie, you will both do great!

xXx

Thanks..Im sure we'll be just fine..just hard to ignore him and he knows it

 

[xarlenex]

I wouldn't even consider it to be honest. Especially with how horrible its parents sound. You really dont want your child growing up with people like that, or with a father that treats his mother with such disrespect x

 

[NewToThis_x]

Thanks hun..Hes decided hes not speaking to me now and its probly for the best!! Still hard though..although im finally finding the strength 2 stand up to him and say no so i guess thats one good thing! Just focussing on the baba right now

 

[Eyes On Fire]

It really sounds like you'd be better off without him. I personally believe if he wants to be a part of your life and his child's life he'll find a way to do it and be considerate of you and your needs too. It's not fair for him to ask you to move so far away from your family when your family has been supporting you. And it doesn't sound like the environment at his families house is very good for you or a child. I'd say forget him until he can get his act together and act like a mature adult. Best of luck to you!

 

[xJG30]

I had a similar thing with Thomas' dad.. i'm in Derby and he's in Essex and wanted me to move down there, I said no and we split a few weeks later.

Deffo sounds like you'd be better off without, concentrate on you and baba x

 

[amelia222]

Wow, he sounds just like my ex! He was controlling and tried to keep me away from the support of my family and only rely on him. I realised that I did not want my child raised by someone like him and moved home. Now I live back with my mom after being on my own for 2 years and it is hard but worth it. I know that my baby will have a much better start in life having supportive family around and I know yours will too. You are so much better off without him!

 

[shaunanicole]

This guy sounds like a joke, IMO. He isn't being understanding, supportive, or respectful. If I were you I'd defiantly keep my distance.