Can't take 3 month old anywhere

[cskme_]

DD is almost 14 weeks old and I would really love to bring her to my gym for strollercize class, or take her swimming or something as we are ALWAYS cooped up in the house. Anytime I try to bring her outside she just screams. She hates her car seat, can't stand being in the car for more than 10 mins. I make sure she's comfortable and I hang her Oball from her car seat handle so she has something to play with. Nothing calms her either except going home and taking her out of the car seat. I really wanted to take her on the track at my gym but I feel like she will just hate being in her stroller. does anyone know if this is a phase that will end soon or if there's anything I can do to help her enjoy being out of the house?
I know she's still little but I would love to get out, for my own sanity. And I don't want her to always hate leaving the house.

 

[Witchrose]

I would just take her, and if she cries, then she cries. I think the only way she'll get used to being out of the house and in such environments, is if she's given the chance to get used to such things.

And maybe if she`s very loud and you're concerned about bothering other patrons, you could start by trying just very short stays there. And as she gets used to it, work your way up toward longer runs/workouts.

Good luck!

 

[donnarobinson]

I agree I wouldn't stay in I would go out she won't get use to it if you don't x

 

[catty]

I would just take her out too. Make sure shes had a good fed and changed, mine have always fallen asleep in the car or walking in the pram but sounds like she wont do that? Id start out small and not book a class or anything just go there and go to the cafe or something until you get used to it.

 

[LoveCakes]

Mine absolutely hates the pram till she was able to sit up herself and see round her. I carried her in a sling and she liked loved it

 

[6lilpigs]

Is it mainly the car she screams in? My last 2 have been utter manic screamers in the car, what helped was giving them a dummy for traveling. If you don't want to use a dummy then maybe a mirror in front of her that reflects into your rear view mirror so she can still see you may help.

 

[DeuceMom]

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[misspriss]

Car screaming is common, usually passes and comes and goes. It's just a necessary evil as we have to use the car to go most places, especially in the US.

Do you take her out of the car seat when you get places? You say the only thing that calms her is taking her home and taking her out. Have you tried taking her out away from home? Perhaps she does not like the infant carrier. It is not recommended to leave them in it long term if you aren't in the car anyway, I know stroller manufacturers make you think so by making them click in and what not.

Have you tried baby wearing? By 14 weeks you should be fine to use a front carrier to walk around the walking track, babies are usually much happier when they are held close to your body, and it's a lot easier to manage than a stroller.

 

[xdxxtx]

Ohh, my first one did this for the first several months of his life. It was terrible. He would scream all the time in his car seat. He wouldn't ride in his stroller, either. I got a Moby wrap and wore him for walks and everywhere else we went, so he'd scream in his car seat, but at least he was happy while we were out. Also, the extra weight was great for burning calories and boosting my strength. I've worn all of my babies since. But staying cooped up in the house will just drive you nuts. Turn on some music, and go have fun. Your baby will get over this, and it certainly won't damage her to cry a bit.

 

[cskme_]

Thank you everyone for your replies! I give her a dummy in the car and she's usually good for the first 10 mins or so, then she cries, I will put her dummy back in her mouth but she will end up spitting it out because she's crying. I have a carrier and a boba wrap and she hates being so close to my body! Which is weird because she loves being held. What I've been doing lately is taking her to places and taking her out of her car seat and carrying her in. She just gets really upset when its time to go back in the car seat, and unfortunately at the gym I can't carry her around (I wouldn't mind with the wrap or carrier but I don't think she'll be too happy with that) the weather is supposed to be a bit nicer here this week so maybe I'll take her out for short walks each day. The -25 degree weather has also been keeping us cooped up in the house.
Thanks again everyone!

 

[Mrs. MB]

I completely feel your pain and I was you a few months ago. My daughter hated absolutely everything. She cried so hard in the car - she would throw up. I kept going places with her and it just kept getting worse. She also hated the stroller and would cry in it unless it was a rare moment when she was asleep. She also hated every carrier/wrap/sling.

Here's what helped us: bought a big convertible seat that she can see out of and isn't in the "turtle" position. She adapted to the car within a few car rides. We took her to the store and sat her in every car seat until she sprawled in one and was kind of enjoying herself. They let us take the car seat for a test drive before we bought it too. We also have a Sophie the Giraffe that she has in the car as it's much larger than a pacifier. When she looses paci she gnaws on the giraffe.

We bought a new stroller (the old one was fitted to the car seat). It allows multiple sit up variations and goes fully bassinet flat. We would raise her a little in the stroller if she was awake and that helped a great deal because she wants to look around.

The only carrier she will deal with is forward. I'm not sure if you tried that yet. She's been in a forward carrier since she could barely hold her head up and peak from over the top of it.

Honestly, things got better when she could hold toys and shove them in the mouth and interact more.

Bottom line - I'm so sorry you're going through this. It's a terrible phase and I hope it passes soon.

 

[DeuceMom]

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[cskme_]

Thanks guys, unfortunately right now I can't afford a new stroller or car seat, she may get better when she's able to go in the stroller on her own without the car seat, I haven't tried her facing forward in the carrier, she's just started holding her head steady so maybe I will give it a try in a week or so, she's still only 10lbs so she may not be able to see over it. She has Sophie too but Sophie is too awkwardly shaped for her mouth at the moment lol, she tries to chew her head and legs but can't seem to get them in her mouth as she would like to and she gets angry lol!
I've only taken her out a few times in the stroller just because I'm in western Canada, it's super cold here! This week is supposed to be milder (around +5 Celsius) so I'm going to try to take grumpy out once a day and see how it goes. Wish me luck!

 

[DeuceMom]

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[Mrs. MB]

I completely understand the expense issue. She should get better once she has the ability to play with toys. I hate that nobody tells you so many babies hate infant car seats... then again, don't get me started on how many things nobody tells you... Baby V was maybe 11 pounds and she could barely poke her head above the carrier with the infant insert in it but I had to have some mode of transportation... I honestly had anxiety and panic every time I had to go somewhere for four months.

DeuceMom - where were you when I was buying all the useless crap!!!! Lol, you're definitely a mom after my own heart.

 

[tommyg]

Been through that and I also feel your pain. Things that helped taking the newborn insert out the seat, mirror so you can see them and they have something to look at, toys and dummy.

 

[Twag]

My DD hated the car seat & car when she was that little also the buggy but the more I took her out in both the more used to it she got and the screaming stopped

Good luck

 

[DeuceMom]

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[minties]

Does LO's carseat have lots of padding and wot-not in it? An infant insert, or a head-hugging head rest? Have you checked to see if any of it is forcing her chin to rest on her chest?

Is the sun/glare in LO's eyes while in the car?

For facing out in a carrier, ideally baby should be 6 months and their chin should clear the panel.

 

[MindUtopia]

I'm sure someone has said it already, but she probably loves being out of the house, just not stuck in a car seat or stroller. Take her somewhere and take her out and hold her or put her in a wrap or carrier (if she doesn't seem comfortable, you might need some help adjusting it or getting her positioned, find a babywearing supporter or sling meet). At that age, no they tend not to just like to be laid down somewhere without you and I never could have done an exercise class with mine at that age. But we got out nearly every day, went to the library, went to the store, went out for coffee, met friends, when to a baby group, went for a walk, etc. I just didn't leave her in the car seat unless we were actually travelling in the car (and we would go out no matter what, I just planned car journeys for nap times which was easier). They really shouldn't be in it more than that anyway. But we got out all the time. You just can't do the things you used to yet so easily because you'll need to have a baby close to you for now. That's fine. Eventually it will get easier. Just figure out activities you can do together that are easier. Classes for her are easier - baby massage, baby yoga, story time or singing, or baby sensory, then she is engaged and you are playing together rather than just lying in a car seat. She will get used to the car if you just persist.