coping....

[jojo23]

hi ladies, been almost 2 weeks since Lily was born sleeping. grief is so strange it hits me at the oddest times... i was fine all week then tonight i just broke down i just cant believe all this happened. i miss my bump and the excitement of being pregnant. im so angry ill never get to hear her cry or see her grow up and im so angry that people are just moving on yet i feel i never will. i have ordered a few bits online memorial candles some jewellry etc so im hoping it will come soon and be my way of remembering her!

hope you are all coping ok find it great to post here and know you will all understand!! my thoughts are with you all and your little angels
xxxx

 

[SassyLou]

Its 4 weeks today since Archie was born, I'm the same, sometimes I'm ok then out of the blue I just break down in tears. I think TBH its all a natural part of grief. I hope the things you've order bring you some comfort.
We bought a frame which is 3 wooden love hearts, (its my picture on my profile if you want to see it, I would upload it but I'm on the old laptop and it won't let me!!!) we put Archie's scan picture in the top heart, his name in the middle and a picture of him after he was born in the bottom. It's on the wall at the side of my bed its the last thing I see at night and the first thing I look at in the morning, it gives me a lot of comfort.

If its ok with you I'll light a candle for Lily when I light one for Archie next time I'm at church?

Love Sarah x

 

[SassyLou]

Sorry didn't realise the time, 4 weeks yesterday xxx

 

[babesx3]

It s true that u never really move on from losing a baby.. u just learn to live with it and cope with your grief..
There isn't a day goes past that i don't think of my baby charlie , and think of how he should be here with me now...
Our little angels will live on in our hearts..i kind of accepted that others don't share in my loss, but that is there loss , cos i have my angel in my heart xxxx

big hugs !!!

 

[jojo23]

Its 4 weeks today since Archie was born, I'm the same, sometimes I'm ok then out of the blue I just break down in tears. I think TBH its all a natural part of grief. I hope the things you've order bring you some comfort.
We bought a frame which is 3 wooden love hearts, (its my picture on my profile if you want to see it, I would upload it but I'm on the old laptop and it won't let me!!!) we put Archie's scan picture in the top heart, his name in the middle and a picture of him after he was born in the bottom. It's on the wall at the side of my bed its the last thing I see at night and the first thing I look at in the morning, it gives me a lot of comfort.

If its ok with you I'll light a candle for Lily when I light one for Archie next time I'm at church?

Love Sarah x

I would love that and Ill do the same for Archie! thanks for your reply hun little things make it so much easier xxx

 

[wish2bmum]

sassy lou - that's a beautiful frame and idea for remembering your little one.

I've just posted something on my thread about how I was feeling then saw this and what you say is exactly as I feel jojo, I don't want to leave my little bubble in my house, today I got up, washed and dressed for the first time since and said to myself to do small things but do to something with the day, even if its just cleaning up a little, but I can't bring myself to do anything. I'm even slipping back into smoking which is making me more upset as I feel guilty that I stopped at that time ago for my baby to have the best chance and I'm throwing that away and giving up on him by starting again!

I hope when your bits arrive you can find comfort and peace in them, I haven't a clue what to do yet? love and best wishes to you

 

[jojo23]

sassy lou - that's a beautiful frame and idea for remembering your little one.

I've just posted something on my thread about how I was feeling then saw this and what you say is exactly as I feel jojo, I don't want to leave my little bubble in my house, today I got up, washed and dressed for the first time since and said to myself to do small things but do to something with the day, even if its just cleaning up a little, but I can't bring myself to do anything. I'm even slipping back into smoking which is making me more upset as I feel guilty that I stopped at that time ago for my baby to have the best chance and I'm throwing that away and giving up on him by starting again!

I hope when your bits arrive you can find comfort and peace in them, I haven't a clue what to do yet? love and best wishes to you

awe hun im sorry for your loss!! i find going for a walk on my own every day is nice it gets me out of the house and i feel better for having the fresh air. i went and got my hair done the other day and i felt like a million dollars. i went to a salon i didnt know so i didnt have to be talking about things and it was lovely and normal for a while!!! its understandable that youve gone back to smoking as its such a stressful time but i have no doubt that you are a strong woman and you will be able to stop again esp when you have something worth stopping for! you'll know what to do for your little angel soon it will come to you! let me know if theres anything i can do for you hun xxxxx thinking of you

 

[wish2bmum]

funny you should say that, just back from a walk with my dogs, I've felt so guilty not taking them out as much as I once did, first it was the sickness, then the scan and bad news, then loosing the baby, I enjoyed it though and for an hour felt quite normal, but realised walking back to the house the grief was waiting! I hope with time things get easier for all of us. I've got to hit the smoking on the head though, I'd wanted to quit for so many years and finding out I was pregnant was the ne thing that did it, I owe it to my boy not to slip again.

thinking of you all xx

 

[jojo23]

funny you should say that, just back from a walk with my dogs, I've felt so guilty not taking them out as much as I once did, first it was the sickness, then the scan and bad news, then loosing the baby, I enjoyed it though and for an hour felt quite normal, but realised walking back to the house the grief was waiting! I hope with time things get easier for all of us. I've got to hit the smoking on the head though, I'd wanted to quit for so many years and finding out I was pregnant was the ne thing that did it, I owe it to my boy not to slip again.

thinking of you all xx

awe i know hun im in that stage where i just dont want to be facing people id be quite happy to just talk to close friends n family now instead of having to tallk to strangers but a friend of mine who has had a few mc was telling me that the worst thing you can do is go into a bubble.

even that walk you had was great for you just to be normal for a little while. and i know you feel guilty doing normal things cause you feel the world shouldnt be moving on but for your own peace of mind you have to do little things to keep you going!! dont beat yourself up too much about the smoking you WILL stop but its a hard few weeks so its totally understandable pet. when you feel ok health wise maybe go to your gp if you feel you cant stop yourself! thats what they're there for! and its great that you didnt smoke while pg you shud be very proud of that!!!!

 

[Semanthia]

I am so sorry for your loss.
I completely know how you feel. Only time can heal your heart, I know that isn't going to help you any right now. You will never get over this, you lost your baby and your heart will always have that scar on it.
If you ever need to just vent/unleash your frustration/anger/sadness right here is the place to do it. I am always open to pm's.
Stay strong, it will get better or at least easier with time.