CSA advice - What if FOB becomes self employed?

[Dezireey]

After finding out more lies recently about my FOB, I am steely determined to get child support off him. He pleaded abject poverty and desperation about the fact he had a part-time job and was also unwell. ( I was aware of where he worked and knew it wasn't a well paid job, so believed him) turns out he has also been working on the sly in another job that seems to be quite lucrative but it looks like this one is where he is self employed ( that's if he pays tax!)

CSA have told me that they can still get money off him if he is self employed but it all takes more time. There is also another 'case' that they say is 'clerical' ( not sure what that means if anyone knows?) I know this is related to his other child, so I also don't understand why they can't link my case and that one and ensure he pays up for both kids?

Just so determined to make this tosser pay up for all the emotional crap he has put me through. Child support is the least thing I can do. has anyone also ever taken FOB to court to get maintenance if CSA are not getting anywhere?

Sorry so many questions, but I want to make sure I have the right information.

 

[babycrazy1706]

Stalking. I hope you get what you and LO deserve soon!!

 

[Dream.dream]

Don't know if it's the same but where I am my mom had a hell of a time getting child supprt from my dad because he was self employed and would lie about him incon or he would work for cash .

The point I guess is at least somewhere they are held responsible . Child supprt debt never goes away even after the cuild turns 18 , so he will always owe you that money

 

[Dezireey]

I just get the impression with CSA that if it is not an easy case for them, they can't be bothered to do all the legwork to get results. Its just not right.

I think its an appalling scenario where a man just leaves a woman pregnant or with kid/s (especially after being in a relationship or marriage to them) and doesn't even offer any sort of money to help, not even £10 a month for formula or nappies, yet they are quite willing to buy gadgets and kitbags and a £60 pair of military gloves (like my ex) whilst their own child could possibly go hungry or without essentials. It just beggars belief.

I am seriously considering getting a Lawyer and taking his ass to court for the money if CSA don't get their act together.

Right, LOL think I need a cup of tea and to just chill out!

 

[babycrazy1706]

Its really aggravating isn't it dezireey. I just sent a msg to fob asking for £60. Its got me feeling wound up bcos he hasn't replied. I also feel guilty for asking for it.

 

[Dezireey]

yep hun it is!

Gotta say though that even though CSA drag their heels a bit, its so much better getting child support through a third party instead of constantly trying to get that loser FOB of mine to help out. His idea of 'helping out' ia giving me advice over the phone when my mother was in hospital. Nope, that doesnt help with LO's upkeep you dufus!

So this way he never gets to stress me out anymore, thankfully

Just dont feel guilty about the £60. Its for your baby, so he has to help. Guranteed if the shoe was on the other foot, these guys would be calling us morning, noon and night for help and money! they totally would!

 

[babycrazy1706]

Yeh they would for sure! Xx

 

[Natsku]

I guess if he pays his taxes they'll be able to chase him up for the money but it will take more time because they would have to assess the amount again each tax period as his income might change (thats what I'm guessing anyway).

If they don't seem to be doing anything about it I'd take him to court - will you get legal aid?

 

[babycrazy1706]

i dont know if legal aid still exists does it???

 

[Ceejay123]

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[Natsku]

Wow that sucks, that is really shitty actually, everyone should have a right to legal help even if they can't afford it.

 

[Ceejay123]

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[Natsku]

Wow that sucks, that is really shitty actually, everyone should have a right to legal help even if they can't afford it.

They've done it because they think it'll help people come to arrangements between themselves... Instead of using court. (Mediations still covered) however you get so many women that simply want their child to themselves, and so many men that try to upset or harm a woman by using their child. Legal aid should dfinitely be in place... Hopefully at least with it gone, people will be forced to think what's best for themselves to help them not face the financial implications of court.

You can go to court for free if you represent yourself, and are entitled to a fee remission from the court (I.e if you are on income support) it's such a shame. Apparently there's been a growing number of people being wrongly accused of domestic violence since it was abolished, as it's the only way to get legal aid.

Makes sense that it would result in that. Such a shame. I'm getting more and more glad that I left the UK!

 

[Dezireey]

I can get legal aid if its is to stop FOB from having access on safety grounds. At the moment, the only problem I have is him avoiding child support and CSA are in the process of dealing with it.

I am wary about the fact he 'says' he sees a daughter on a regular basis on a website (though I think this is another one of his fantasy lies as not once did he mention her during our three years together and when I was pregnant he said he had a dead son!!?) If it is the truth though, this concerns me as it implies that his 'I hate kids' mantra may have been about babies/toddlers and does he intend to get in contact with my son when he is older? If so, this, I will go to court for.

He is now posting pictures on his web page about guns, knives, killing deer and army stuff (he has never been in the army?).....I DO NOT want that man influencing e.g a teenage son about stuff like that, so If he ever intends to make contact with him in the future, I will definitely now go to court with the case that his father is now unbalanced and could have underlying violent behaviour (never saw that myself though).

Its a tough call but what is most important is the safety of a child and now, having found out so much stuff about my ex, I believe that going to court to stop any access now or in future is the best move for any mother.