Curious? Anyone NOT giving baby the fathers last name?

[surreysharon]

will be having my surname

 

[purpledahlia]

She's got my Surname

 

[DivaSatanica]

I thought I had decided to give Bruce my surname......then I got weak at the hospital and signed for his health card with the two name hyphenated. I registered him yesterday and came to my senses.......he only has my last name.

 

[cielsha]

my dauhgter has my last name and i'm so proud

 

[gemabee]

its a lot less common for us extremely proud single mums to give OUR babies the fob's last name than ours.
i never considered givin finn fob's last name for a second.

 

[purpledahlia]

TBH, I think id of given her my surname even if i wasnt single, but if i was unmarried. I wouldnt want a different name from my kids. So id only give the fathers surname if i was married i think. If i ever get married her name will change too so we always have the same name!

 

[scottishgal89]

TBH, I think id of given her my surname even if i wasnt single, but if i was unmarried. I wouldnt want a different name from my kids. So id only give the fathers surname if i was married i think. If i ever get married her name will change too so we always have the same name!

That's what I plan to do aswell

 

[xSophieBx]

I was going to give lily his last name and then luckily I came to my senses and she now has my surname - phew. Its so much better cos wen we go 2 the docs etc we have the same surname.. I'd hate to have a diff surname to my baby x

 

[TattiesMum]

She can... but i think you may need his permission? (I read that somewhere on here, so im not sure how true that is). But i do no that if you wanted to, you could give LO a different surname to you and FOB if you wanted, so whatever name your LO has, it doesnt have any legal implications, like giving him PR.

But if you did give LO his surname, it may have complications for you, as you could have issues taking LO out of the country for holidays etc...

xx

All 3 of mine had their FOB's last name as we were married when we had them and it was the norm. after we split up I changed their name to mine by 'common usage' ie 'known as' and that was used by schools, doctors etc. their passports though had to be in their birth name and I never had any problems with taking them abroad on holidays etc

Now they are all adults they have changed their own names by deed poll so it isn't an issue at all

 

[lou_w34]

She can... but i think you may need his permission? (I read that somewhere on here, so im not sure how true that is). But i do no that if you wanted to, you could give LO a different surname to you and FOB if you wanted, so whatever name your LO has, it doesnt have any legal implications, like giving him PR.

But if you did give LO his surname, it may have complications for you, as you could have issues taking LO out of the country for holidays etc...

xx

All 3 of mine had their FOB's last name as we were married when we had them and it was the norm. after we split up I changed their name to mine by 'common usage' ie 'known as' and that was used by schools, doctors etc. their passports though had to be in their birth name and I never had any problems with taking them abroad on holidays etc

Now they are all adults they have changed their own names by deed poll so it isn't an issue at all

Ohhh thats good then!!
I just read of a few instances where mothers tried to take the children out of the country for a holiday and they got questionned, but that probably doesnt happen often!

 

[bw1691]

I gave my little boy my last name.
I hoped that me and FOB would stay together and work things out.
I from the beggining was giving him my name and when FOB kicked up a fuss about it i said why is a big problem, if he was serious enough about us then eventually when we got married it would be easy to change his last name...then what happened, three months down the line things have'nt worked out, so glad i never gave baby his name.
And ive heard a lot of horror stories about taking babies on holiday getting out okay but not getting back in easily because mum and baby have different names.

 

[mari72]

I have to admit i think unmarried mums who choose to give their babies the fathers name are a bit short sighted. I can understand the whole emotional thing and wanting baby to have a connection to dad but unless you get married then baby will always have a different name to you and why would that be a good thing? My daughter has my name and i told her dad that if/when we got married that i'd change both our names but until that happened it was non negotiable. I know too many women who have found themselves in situations where they bitterly regret giving baby FOB surname-and nothing to do with a bad break up just the reality of picking your child up from school and being called mrs 'ex boyf name' and the general fact that your own child doesn't even have your name! Let's face it you wouldn't do it if you weren't full of pregnancy hormones and all the sentimental rot that fills your brain with xx

 

[leoniebabey]

i gave him his dads name as at the time i was in a very controlling relationship and i felt as if i had to, very much regret this

i would say unless your in a steady relationship then give them your name if you and the father stick together it can always be changed before they go to school, but its much harder to change it back if you cant get FOB consent

 

[angelpkj]

this is something im finding hard to think about now
FOB finished me at 5months pregnant,he has another child who is 5 and she has her mothers maiden name
i really want baby to have FOBs name
but starting doubting now

i think FOB will be around at times
but in regards to if he deserves to have that "right" as a father for baby to have his last name im not to sure anymore

startin to think hang on,i've been there and loved baby from day one,im 6 months pregnant and hes only just decided he wants play dad so i feel like i deserve a part of me in babys name

 

[Newdreemz]

this is something im finding hard to think about now
FOB finished me at 5months pregnant,he has another child who is 5 and she has her mothers maiden name
i really want baby to have FOBs name
but starting doubting now

i think FOB will be around at times
but in regards to if he deserves to have that "right" as a father for baby to have his last name im not to sure anymore

startin to think hang on,i've been there and loved baby from day one,im 6 months pregnant and hes only just decided he wants play dad so i feel like i deserve a part of me in babys name

I know how you feel. but I do think at the end of the day if he's not married to you, or even at least your fiance then it would probably be best to give the baby your last name. I probably would have given my baby FOB last name had I not read all of these replies.

My last son is a Jr, and his dad is hardly around. And HE WANTED ME to make him a Jr! I just went along with it The irony right? I regret that. I regret it so much I have thought about seeing if I can change my son's last name to mine as me and his father were never married. So I just could not see myself doing this again. but I know how you feel.

 

[angelpkj]

i think its easier to seek forgiveness than permission

so itl be easier for him to "forgive" me and get over baby not havin his last name
than to find permission to change babys last name if need be

 

[lilgemsy]

Up to now, I plan to give my baby a double barrelled surname.
Mine first, then FOB's.
It may change though to just mine as I dont think FOB really deserves to let his name be carried on through my child if he doesnt even bother with him =/
We'll have to wait and see what happens though really.

 

[Linz88]

i didnt.. and not even just because hes a twat.. i want all my children having my last name.. even if i marry.. my child wil have my maiden name xx

 

[karmah]

This was a regular disagreement when I was with my LO's father. He adamantly wanted strictly his last name, I would only conceed to my name only or my name-then his. My older son has my last name and this is something I am quite happy with! Now that my baby's daddy has disappeared I can go ahead and give it my name. Which was what I wanted the whole time anyways! lol I was trying to be agreeable by suggesting both our names.

 

[rosie5637]

when i had my son i gave him his fathers surname. although we weren't together i was a bit old fashioned and i also thought that his dad would change his mind and be a part of his life. the other thing was that my own surname was my married name so it would've felt weird to give him that name, not mine to give iyswim.

i regret this now though. his dad never came back and is not on his birth cert.

i have recently changed back to my maiden name by deed poll and i think when my son is a little older i will ask if he wants to change too. i am hopefully going to have 1 or 2 more children via AI and so they will have my surname and i think maybe my son would feel different if he were the only one with a different name.

wish i could turn back time. then i would've changed my name back before my son was born and given him my name