Decisions...

[Brightxeyes]

So I said the whole time I wanted to attempt to breast feed.. But he had difficulty latching on whilst I was in hospital over night and it stressed him out and me out. I managed to get him to latch once and have some colostrum for about half an hour.

I tried a few times before I left and no luck. I then felt bad as he hadn't eaten much. I was tired. He was tired. He was also choking up mucus, and throwing it up and it made me panic. So I thought okay let's try formula.

The bottle helped him digest down the mucus in his system so he stopped choking on it instead.

And he was a bit perplexed by the teet so was a bit lazy on sucking at first. I then tried later on after the first day of bottle feeding to latch again. He did but it didn't feel like there wasn't anything for him to drink cuz he wouldn't settle. It's like he used it as a dummy instead and I was nearly falling asleep holding him and after the third attempt and he woke up screaming again when I put him down, I had to get the other half to take over with a bottle so I could sleep. And apparently he had s horrible night with sick up and I thought is that because I bottle fed and attempted to breast feed again??

I have now got the swollen feel to my boobs. Day one... Is it gonna feel worse than this?! Feel like they're going to explode. Any who. They're leaking.
Do I attempt Brest feeding,, or at the very least pumping???

I love the idea of breast feeding. But when you're exhausted, it's very time consuming, only I can do it unless I pump...

Should I at least pump while I'm leaking and do that for a few months and then stop??

Ah I really don't know what to do. Anyone else have a similar start? What did you do and why? Xxx

 

[Tigerlilyb]

It all sounds fairly normal to me. Don't forget your newborn is also exhausted and has never latched before so it's a learning experience for both of you. It's quite normal for them to not seem too bothered at first, or to fuss around it a bit.

Your boobs are swollen because your milk's come in and yes, if you don't pump or feed him it'll get worse til your supply dries up (if you choose to FF only). They'll keep on swelling like that between feeds til your supply regulates (about 6ish weeks on average) but the relief you'll get after feeding is fantastic

It is time consuming yes, but so is pumping and FF. When you get into a rhythm with it it's the easiest thing ever. No bottles to clean or fiddly pump parts.

He might seem fussy if you keep offering formula because it's so easy to get the milk from a bottle but he has to work a bit to get milk from you.

My son had trouble latching on the first day but now he's a pro. You both just need practice Best of luck!

 

[caitlyn2009]

If you really want to breastfeed then I would stick with trying. Offer the breast frequently, look into positioning to get a good latch and only use formula if you really think you need to. You may feel like he is using you as a pacifier but that is all part of trying to bring in your milk. If you can, I would stop the bottles and pacifiers if he is taking them.

As for pumping and bottle feeding... I did it for my little girl for a couple months and yes it is a lot of work but I think it is worth it for them to get breast milk. I would start pumping every 2 hours around the clock for now and be sure to pump for 10-15 mins after you stop getting milk. This helps you get a healthy supply started.

In the end the important thing is that baby is fed so do what feels right to you

 

[Cheska]

I think these two ladies advise is fandabidoozey!

I would just add if your going down the pumping route.... Try him on the breast at least once a day.

My first son was in special care for the first 16days of his life, most of which I spent expressing. When he was strong enough to feed he had breast if I was there at feed time or bottle of breast milk given by a nurse if I wasn't. I was warned if he had a bottle he may not be able to breast feed. I didn't feel concerned as my main concern was that he had breast milk. He came home being able to so both and I feel convinced it was due to trying him breast feeding at least once a day!

Least then if he can do both your still able to decide rather than thinking damn I should have done this or that....

Good luck x

 

[noon_child]

I'm sorry the hospital let you go home feeling helpless about how to get baby to latch properly.

Like pp's have said it all sound very normal and yes it is exhausting at first. However I'm not sure bottle feeding is any less exhausting. I never slept through when my LO cried so every time it was "his" turn to feed LO the expressed milk I had worked so hard to get, I had to wake up, shake DH, shake him again, explain why I'd woken him, watch his painfully slow progress to get up, get up myself to comfort LO while DH warmed the milk. By the time the feed was underway I was wide awake and it would have been easier just to do it myself!

You are UK based so there is lactation support out there. LLL, NCT and ABM to name a few - they do home visits and offer great advice - and your Health visitor should be able to tell you where your nearest baby cafe (breastfeeding group with peer support and health visitors) is.

 

[AK89]

That's a shame that the midwives didn't help you with his latch! They really should have..

I had the same issue the first night with the fussing and the mucus. The midwife tried to help me get her to latch on for a while, and then helped me hand express some into a syringe to feed her. After a bit of perseverance she got the hang of it and now we have no trouble at all!

I would keep trying to latch him on if I were you.. I know it can be stressful, especially when they're fussing and you're worried they're hungry but it's totally worth it in the end!! It's so much easier than faffing about with formula and sterilising bottles all the time, not to mention it's so much better for the baby, and it's FREE!

Just keep putting your nipple to his nose/top lip and eventually he'll catch the drift and open his mouth and you stick it right in there! As much of it as you can! In fact you have to get all the bottom of the areola in but none of the top, so the nipple is pressed against the roof of his mouth.

I know it can be a bit tough at the start but keep trying and you'll get he hang of it! Maybe try googling the best positions? YouTube??

 

[Brightxeyes]

I'm just in two minds about it all because of the tiredness!

Plus when I start going out I am quite shy I suppose and don't feel so comfortable with doing it publically myself.
Even like at families houses, I'd rather go to another room.

I may at least try to pump. But my god I've never felt pain like this. It's a very strange one! I honestly feel like my boobs are trying to give birth to something! I thought they were big this morning, they've doubled now! And I've never had boobs.. Nothing big, a small handful.

And now I feel like holding baby, and General tasks, they're in the way so badly!! How do people with boons ever do anything?!?

Gonna try and pump this evening after ive had a nap wish me luck!
I don't think I want baby to latch whilst I'm feeling so tender,
I'll pump to get a bit of relief first!

 

[AK89]

PS. The position of the nipple in his mouth is ESSENTIAL. If you just get the nipple in (which my little one seemed to like to do at the beginning!) it can be agony! But with the right positioning and a week or so's experience (it can be a bit uncomfortable until your nipples are used to it) it's not painful at all and it's a really nice experience

 

[AK89]

Have you tried hand expressing to get rid of some of the excess milk so you're not so comfortable and so it's not hard for LO to latch?

 

[purplecupcake]

I was so so exhausted the first two weeks, but BF moms actually tend to get more sleep as you don't even need to get out of bed for a feed (if you're co-sleeping, of course, or bring baby to bed to feed and nap while he eats).

It really does get easier after a few weeks.

 

[Brightxeyes]

I barely even want to touch them at the moment, I've just had a paracetomol and I may have a nap (although the pain is that bad I don't think I can sleep) and then attempt to express a little once the paracetomol would have kicked in!

I just get a sudden period of throbbing and at the moment it's at its worst...

I also love the idea of breast feeding helping to contract everything back into place!

I found that even before my milk came in my nipples are still quite flat and don't tend to stick out very much in general. So he had the whole thing in his mouth and still not a lot of grip on it

 

[Tigerlilyb]

Expressing or getting your little one to latch would probably be the best thing for the pain at the moment, the latch may hurt a tad at first (as will the pump in all honesty) but as soon as some milk has gone you'll feel better, promise

If you want to breastfeed or pump then leaving yourself engorged will put you at risk of clogged ducts and mastitis which you really don't want

 

[caitlyn2009]

It definitely would be best to get some of the milk out like pp mentioned so you don't end up with any problems that will lead to more pain.

 

[noon_child]

I found that even before my milk came in my nipples are still quite flat and don't tend to stick out very much in general. So he had the whole thing in his mouth and still not a lot of grip on it

When there is engorgement in those early days, latching a baby can be difficult because it's like trying to get them to bite a balloon. there's just too much pressure behind the nipple so it just doesn't become "mouth shaped". Expressing/pumping off a little of the excess before latching can help with this and can help make your nipples stick out further.

 

[Cheska]

My milk came in on day 3. I think until then he was just sucking for comfort. I also think he used me as a giant dummy for the first 4 weeks until I found a dummy he would take. They were the 'difficult' days. Now it's all good. I choose it over formula for ease as I have an almost 2 yr old. And it is way easier. Espesh in the night.

Totally your decision but don't let the 'doing it in public' put you off. I'm also shy and not keen on doing it in public but there's ways around it. I'm sure your family won't mind you going in another room. I used to go in another room and then come back once I had latched him on with a big muslin covering us. In terms of going out I tend to try and feed him before we go out so he is ok until I'm back. Or if out longer the car. I am getting a bit more adventurous - we did it in m and s cafe the other day! I honestly don't think other people even notice if your discreet xx

 

[purplecupcake]

They also make cute nursing covers for public, I have one made by Udder Covers I used for a couple weeks...then I just started whipping them out all willy nilly

 

[lauraemily17]

Try the "flipple" technique.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=M8iYdNE-ShY

Changed our breast feeding world learning that & stopped the excruciating pain & bleeding nipples.

 

[AnonymousCAT]

I have flat nipples too and am working on fb with a nipple shield so baby can latch easier until he gets the hang of it. It's a little silicone thing you stick to your bb to extend the nipple to make latching easier. Working well for us to latch. My problem is a sleepy baby due to prematurity. I am pumping with a hospital grade double electric pump to try and establish my milk supply every 2-3 hrs