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Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Third Trimester' started by MissGx, Jan 31, 2011.
i think that's totally reasonable. Your first day should be about you getting to know your LO and learning to be comfortable in your new roll as a mother, not hosting for a bunch of people. They should respect your wishes for some alone time with your new little bundle, you have waited 9 months after all!
no your not being a super bitch.i feel the same and i cant see why people think im being unreasonable either.
ive asked hubby if we can keep baby quite until we have both eaten and had a sleep.will prob wait until im out of delivery and in the maternity ward until i evan think about making phone calls.not evan letting parents no!
i completely agree and dont want anyone at the hospital either or when i first come out, but not sure its gonna go down too well as I havent told anyone yet except the hubby..... x
Oh hun! I think that's totally fair! Even when one of my closest and oldest friends had her baby, I waited until she told me she was ready for visitors and really didn't want to push her!
Just say to people you will let them know when you're feeling up to visitors. At the end of the day you don't want other people around to spoil those first precious moments and days with your baby!
Just tell them where to go, blame the hormones or whatever later, but be selfish! Have YOUR time with baby, that is important!
I don't think you're being unreasonable in the slightest!
No youre not a bitch.
It's your baby, your body, your decision!
If others still want to push you or come around anyways then they are the ones that are rude, not you.
I don't want anyone here either during the birth, or the first day of her life. I just want it to be me , my hubby and our little girl.
If others want to disagree and tell me they'll come anyways, I'll probably not open the door.
I'm sooooo glad you all agree and understand where I'm coming from! I was really starting to feel like I was doing something completely terrible and horrible! Thank you!
I understand how you feel completely! Everyone thinks I am uptight for not wanting visitors right away. My mom told me to stop stressing out about it because it will be fine... however I just don't want people around me right away.
Do what you want and stand your ground. Good Luck
I feel the same. Right now I'm not sure I want visitors for a few weeks after LO gets here. People think I'm being silly, but its how I feel. Maybe I will change my mind by then, but if I do I can always invite them over. Not sure I'm going to tell anyone when I go into labor!!
Do what's best for you and your baby. They will get over it.
We are only allowing grandparents at the hospital...after she is born, not during labor. Then we told everyone no visitors for two weeks. We've been saying this from the very beginning and now they are all OK with it. It did take some time, but it is our baby and there will be more than enough opportunities for them to come and visit later.
Just do as my sis does remind people that 30 or so years ago new mums were treated like Queens, they were to rest in hospital, their babies were looked after in the hospital nursery for 4 or 5 nights for them to sleep and only brought to them during the night if they were Breast Feeding.
So in the current climate of getting thrown out the door within hours of the birth means you will be tired and trying hard to adjust to having a new baby along with all of the other demands on you.
I've said I dont want anyone in the house for 2 weeks - possibly the end of week 2.. and only if I feel up to it..
I was bombared last time - I remember sitting on teh sofa - in a daze with so many people in my living room I couldnt actually relax (I had to sit upright - and I coudlnt')
So if your mean - I'm pure EVIL !!!
The only people we are letting around is my parents and siblings, as I'M gonna be the one needing help and support, since my husband has to go back to work after I have her. So they're allowed, and we are shutting all blinds and locking all doors other than that, and if people drop by, we just won't answer. My husband's done the ultimate no no and told everyone that he would tell them when I'm in labor so they will know when to come to the hospital. Course, I told him the only people allowed in my room are my parents and siblings, because if he invites anyone else in my room I can't be held responsible for my actions if I decide to hit them. Of course, he understands this NOW, AFTER he's already invited people to the waiting room. So he got reasonable and said if the waiting room gets crowded he will send his guests home, as my parents and siblings are enough support for him as well.
That's a great idea. As my birthing plan says I don't want anyone around for the first hour but by reading that I'm motivated to make it the entire first day. You're not being bitchy at all...it'll be nice to just breathe and enjoy the moment.
GOSH!they can get over it. ur not a bitch at all. one:u n baby need time to relax, two:u need bonding time with your baby, three:its your baby u can hide it if you want!(lol)
I told DH that Im only letting his mom brothers and dad visit me and my mom and dad, that no extended family is coming to see us in the hospital. And you know what he said?!?!
"I CANT PROMISE YOU ANYTHING!"
what the FU*CKK does that mean? I wanted to hit him! I have to go through a possible 30 hours of labor (milk it, milk it :haha) and HE gets to decide when Im up to having visitors?? I dont think so!
You can request only immediate family members of the parents on your birthing plan. I plan on doing this now ha.
I don't want visitors straight away either, stick to your guns its your baby! xx
Hunny i totally feel for you! i have been quite lucky. I expressed to my partner that i didnt want visitors at hospital, and i plan in staying in one night. I plan on breastfeeding too so i pointed out that i dont wana be sat in a hospital bed with my first child, trying hard to get them to latch, while being stressed with visitors wanting to hold. He actually agreed. We have said that on the way home from hospital we will pop by the parents houses, and introduce our little one, but once were home, we would like to be left alone for a few days to get used to the fact we are new parents. So far everytone is fine, my mum was a bit pissed but i just pointed out that its one day, the first day! she gets to be a granny all her life but i only get this day once. I still have a feeling they will turn up at hospital, so all people will know is if im in labour. i will only instruct oh to tell people when im ready, hopefully at night so he can just be she sleeping, will see you tomorrow hehe...
jus be firm, dont back down! Tell them you will see them when your ready and not before! If they turn up just hide in your room. They were warned already... and if need be come back and vent on us! people can be so selfish sometimes, you have just given birth, you have a life changing thing in front and they just wana see. patience people lol
I hate people think they have a god given right to see the baby as soon as they can!
I'm having my mum as my 2nd birth partner. My Dad and OH's Mum and Dad will be allowed at the hospital.
I don't want anybody visiting within the first week or so. Possibly mine and OH's siblings I haven't made my mind up yet.