Desperate need of help - night sleep, naps - everything! Baby doesn't get enough!

[superfrizbee]

I will try an keep this as brief as possible! My son is a horrible sleeper. I'm exhausted and so is he, it's vital he gets enough as he has physio to do which is tiring for him as it is. He can wake anywhere from hourly to 2-3 hourly. He's hard to resettle without feeding. He can't transition between sleep cycles because he rubs his face to soothe and wakes himself up, and cant be "left to it" because he will flare up the eczema on his forehead. I'm confident it's not actually itchy as it's well controlled, but it would get red if I let him rub. He needs to be held/fed to sleep more and more, not helped by the fact I'm so knackered at night that I fall asleep holding him. Not intentional! his naps are 20 minutes long and be's tired again nearly straight away. He sleeps in s co sleeper like cot next to our bed, there's not enough room in our bed to actually co sleep and I don't trust my dh not to roll on him. I'm not personally into cc or cio, but something needs to change and I need a plan! Please help!

 

[Fizzyfefe]

Aw hun, you both must be exhausted. sorry you're going through this. I completely understand how awful it is to have a horrible sleeper and to be so exhausted yourself.

For his naps, does he sleep better on you? Would it benefit you to get a carrier or wrap so that you could hold him while he sleeps? Does he take a pacifier?

For night time, the only thing I can recommend is sleeping in shifts. My hubby and I had to do that for a while. He would come home from work, we'd eat dinner together, and then I would go straight to bed and sleep until around 1 am. Then we'd switch and I would be the one to stay awake with him. If I didn't get any sleep, I would wake him up at six so that I could get an hour nap before he had to get ready for work. It sucks not having that alone time with hubby, and I also see that you have another child, so that may not work for you.

 

[felix555]

At that age my LO was exactly the same ... or worse actually. I waited it out BUT! I have one child I can't imagine how tired you must be with the two and everything else going on.

Do you think gradual retreat will help? He will still cry a little but you will be there. If you decide to do CC you wouldn't be a horrible parent ... you have a lot on your plate and if you believe it will help him to get the sleep to then get through the physio then that can't be such a bad thing?

 

[VALiz]

Maybe CC and a swaddle? Mine is a binky plucker so have to still swaddle although he can break out of it easily. He wants his binky but can't leave it alone. Before that, it was his feet. Not sure why his hands always have to be aggravating him.

I broke down and had to do CC. I don't have the angelic baby that will let you rock him to sleep. You have to bounce him while he screams and arches his back. We are so much better for it and it didn't take long at all. We're both better rested and I appreciate him so much more. It can be hard to bond with a sleep deprived grumpy baby who screams at you while your practically breaking your back to bounce his 20lb butt around. Haha I know my situation was a bit different than yours but it worked for us.

Best of luck!

 

[LeannieB]

Hi my LO is still sleeping awful as well. He also can only get back to sleep if I feed him back too sleep. Sorry I dont have any advice just wanted you too know your not alone. xx

 

[catty]

For me personally getting him to get himself to sleep was what changed everything. For the first 9ish months I'd do whatever it took to get him to sleep and then he'd wake an hour later, I was pregnant and knackered. We decided to move him back into our room and decided once he was in his bed that was him for the night (except if he was actually hungry) Wed rub his back, sing, read books or whatever but it was horrible. There was quite a bit of crying but he would have done that in my arms anyway. We were in the room whilst he cried holding his hand or something and it was less than a week and he was actually wanting to go to bed bed after that. I then started waking him up early so he'd be tired for his naps. I'd drive with him if that worked or walking Tec and eventually I found the washing machine worked.

Sorry for blabbering but I know how u feel, I used to get so so anxious for bedtime but it rely did help him falling asleep in his cot

 

[Gym knickers]

I'm right there with you. My lo has gone from doing 7 hour stretches to hourly wake ups, sometimes to feed but not always. I'm terrified of waking her older sister so more often than not we end up co-sleeping just to settle her and stop her crying. I'm not comfortable with it and try to put her back in her cot next to me- 15 mins and the eyes pop open again. Her daytime naps are crap too, dd1 wakes her a lot of the time and I can't put her down in peace very often as we are out at toddler groups etc. I'm up most of the night with her then dd bounds in at 6am and I want to cry. No advice but I feel your pain!

 

[rosegarden620]

First of all, I am sorry you are so exhausted! HUGS! I am right there with you!
Second, I'm no baby whisperer but I do manage to sleep some and will give you some tips that have helped me. Hopefully they work!

1. Get LO ready for nap BEFORE they get tired or when you start to notice early sleep cues, like:
a. yawning
b. fidgeting
c. fussing (even if its just one)
d. eye rubbing

2. set a routine helps and gets your baby used to a flow of things. So, what has been working for me is the E/W/S cycle (Eat/ Wake/ Sleep) and more specifically Eat/ Wake/ Play/ Sleep. Gauge out how long your little one is awake at a time and start settling him down for a nap about 30-40 minutes before (as time goes on it will be easier to settle him thus requiring less time).
3. Make sure you have a designated sleep area especially if LO is easily awakened.
4. Swaddle! Especially if your little one rubs to self sooth. Some babies act as if they don't enjoy being swaddled (and some truly don't) but majority will sleep longer if swaddled.
5. With naps being so short, try to stretch them longer for a max of 1 hour at a time (any longer puts you at risk to have an overtired baby). Don't immediately come to the baby when he starts fussing, give him 5 minutes than come in and sooth him without picking him up... whatever you can do. Pacifier, shush-pat, PU/PD....
6. Begin a nighttime routine and set an early bedtime and stick with it.
7. Put baby down to sleep when they are drowsy but not asleep....

Finally, an overtire baby will sleep poorly.

Again, I'm not a pro but some of these things have been lifesavers.
Whatever you try, consistency is KEY!

This site has been a godsend too:
https://www.mybabysleepguide.com

 

[BethHx]

My 8 month old wakes every 2 hours also and wakes at 5am foe the day.
ive triwd everything.
Im exhausted. I have a 2.5 year old and im also pregnant.
I know hos you feel x