Did anybody have their mother-in-law & mother in the room?

[MrsStutler]

After much arguing with the DH I've decided to go ahead and have my mother in the delivery room with strict instructions on what will get her kicked out and what she is expected to do. I was thinking of asking my mother in law if she would like to be there too. I have a really wonderful relationship with my MIL and would love it if she could see her first grandchild born. I know she would be perfectly behaved but I wonder if it may offend my own mother. Do you think it would be odd or weird to have both mom and MIL there? I'm not shy by any means so revealing my lady parts isn't a big deal, I figure she's a woman so she knows what it all looks like anyways

 

[clarsair]

Jesus, I can't think of a worse situation! But if you're comfortable and happy for them to be there then that's what matters - do it.

 

[madcatwoman]

Jesus, I can't think of a worse situation! But if you're comfortable and happy for them to be there then that's what matters - do it.

um, i echo this.
personally a nightmare for me!

 

[aj11]

I think it is a wonderful idea if you are comfortable with it, and everyone gets along. for my daughters birth i had my DH, my mom, my step-mom, and my father. (of course they weren't all standing around my bed staring at the baby crowning)...BUT it was an absolutely fabulous experience for everyone. my dad has been a nurse for 30+ years and been involved in hundereds of births, and it was something special for him to be there for the birth of his granddaughter. even though my parents have been divorced for 26 years, they were great (and my stepmom and him have been married for 17 years).

They were wonderful support during the labor, the birth and after. and once i was all stitched up, and the baby had been kissed by everyone they all left to give us private time for awhile.

do what you feel is right!

 

[hardworknmama]

Both my mom and MIL were in the room during the birth of both boys. I had originally only wanted my mom in there with OH and I but once I was in labor I stopped caring. It was actually nice to have both of them in there and they both stayed a respectable distance away while I was pushing. Heck, my SIL walked in while I was spread eagle in the stirrups pushing out Tiarnan. At first I was mortified but then I remembered that she was sharing her birthday with him so who cares what she saw.

 

[amerikiwi]

Dh's parents are divorced and re-married. I had both my MIL and my step-MIL in the room for delivery. My midwife thought it was crazy when I first told her, but they get along well and I have a great relationship with both so for me it worked out really well. Everyone had a clear understanding that if for any reason, I wanted anyone to leave, that were to do so without question, but we had no problems at all! Both have been invited back for the next birth.

If you are good with it, I say go for it! It's a great thing to share and you'll probably find your MIL will be a great support for your DH, which in turn, makes it easier for him to support you more.

 

[MissRhead]

I personaly wouldnt. But thats because i didnt have a very good relationship with ex MIL. I dont think your mum would be offended, i think she would just feel happy you asked he to be their? x

 

[BrokenfoREVer]

That sounds like a nightmare for me personally. But if thats going to work for you then go for it, its your labour after all

 

[5-a-side]

I know for me I couldn't do it but I think its a lovely thing to offer both mum's, it would be a privileged for them I would say.

 

[GingerNut]

That's a lovely thought. If you get on well with them both then go for it! I'm sure it's a memory they'll treasure forever.

 

[FeistyMom]

I hadn't wanted anyone but DH w/ me during my first labor, but things did not go according to plan and my mom ended up driving me to the hospital with my dad while hubby raced from work. I honestly did not know WHO was in the room once hubby finally got there - I only had eyes for him and then my darling daughter. Apparently both of my parents stayed the entire time!

That said, I'd rather of had my MIL than my mom - I got along with her better! So I don't think its weird at all to have your MIL there. Sometimes it is easier to have boundaries/good communication with a MIL than a mother; on the other hand, sometimes the MIL is the devil!

 

[JadeEmChar]

I had my MIL and it was horrible. She kept popping her head behind mine and asking me if im ok lol i was ready to kill her.

 

[cupcakemomma]

I plan on having both my mother and MIL there. I'm very close with my mom, and I get along great with my MIL (and they get along with each other! Lol) This will be my in-laws' third grandchild, but my MIL wasn't there for either of the other births, so I thought I'd extend the invitation to this one, she was SO excited!

It pretty much depends on your relationship with them, I suppose.

 

[Sini]

Id rather poke sticks under my nails than have my MIL at the birth! Id love to have my mom there, but she is in another country so wont be happening. It sounds like a lovely gesture tho to let family members experience the birth

 

[mumanddad]

I had my mum mil and oh but because i was so drugged up due to still born and they wanted to keep a close eye on me.. Lucky really because i wasnt looked after my the mw

 

[OctBebe]

IM having mum MIL and OH at the birth, they only just met at my baby shower on Saturday. I think it will be ok mums a bit crazy and will be trying to take over from the MW and I can see me telling her to f off out of the room.

 

[Jem]

I had my mum, MIL and hubby at the birth of my 1st child but it wasn't planned that way lol! It was just meant to be my mum and hubby but my MIL ended up staying. I have to say though she was fab and when my daughter turned out to be an undiagnosed breech, my MIL was brilliant as she was able to step away from the situation so to speak and had a clear head over everything so remained calmer whereas my mum and hubby with the emotional attachment, well they panicked! Anyway for my 2nd child's birth it was just my mum and hubby again and was straight forward too so was better x

 

[saphire76]

I had both of them and my DH. For the 1st 12 hrs it was just DH and I but the next 12 was all of them. I don't really have any type of relationship with my MIL but I thought it only fair if I was having my mom to have his. I have to tell you, it really was OK! I don't know if I was so busy trying to get that baby out or what but I didn't have a problem and neither did they. We all were just trying to help to the final goal lol

 

[DaisyBee]

I didn't want anyone in the room besides dh and feel the same this time around. It was such a bonding experience for my husband and I that I feel would not have been quite the same with mom or mil there.

I could have cared less about the nurses/ students in the room but they weren't there for the whole labor. Usually just one nurse.

If you feel like you want them both there... Then go for it. It just isn't for me at all.

 

[Clarke221]

I've fretted over this a lot and came to the conclusion that it'll just be DH and I. They may be allowed in to say hi if I have a slow labor, but if I say out, it means out now. My mom and I have our moments, I think she'd be okay, but MIL doesn't get along with any of my family and drives me mad. There is no way I want that woman in there with me while I give birth!

I say if that's what you want and everyone gets along though, go for it. It's about what you want.