Different Treatment for Over 35

[HCothren]

I am a 37 year old mother of 2 who is TTC. First child was born when I was 28 and second at 30. I started wondering if and when I conceive will I be treated differently at the OB/GYN office...at my childrens school...at the grocery store...etc. Has anyone else wondered if people will treat them like they are too old to be having children?

 

[readyformore]

It seems like many women on here have gotten negative comments about their age.

I am 35, my ob/gyn and the RE's office keep telling me how young I am. I had my first child at 25, second at 27, and third at 31. Maybe it's just the practitioners that I see, or maybe it's my area? I'm not sure, but everyone has been very reassuring about being 'AMA' and it's really a non-issue for me. My ob/gyn did have a baby at 42 and her partner is ttc at 40, so they consider me a baby still, lol.

As for other mom's at my kids school............I don't really care what they think.


As long as you don't think you are too old to be raising kids, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.

 

[faithmum]

I'm 45 with 3 children who are in middle school - I'm sure I will get lots of looks and comments and you know what? I just don't care. People (especially women) can be cruel to one another and if it's not one thing it's another....might as well make it easy for them. It's your life and little ones have a way of keeping us young so while I may seem too old to one group of people - to another group; I'm going to be the "young" one.

Additionally, the older you get....the less you care about what others think. I LOVE my 45 year old mental state. I feel confident, competent, trustworthy and yes; WISE. Many blessings to all of us here!! Oh - I like my 45 year old body more too (I'm not so hard on her).

 

[SabrinaKat]

I had a few negative comments when I mc'ed at 41 (from a nurse at the hospital!), but in my next pregnancy went to another hospital and the treatment I got was/is fantastic. I conceived my little boy at 43 and had him 12 days ago at the ripe old age of 44, and both my ob/gyn and midwife started talking about birth control and if we wanted another to wait at least six months before stopping contraception!

Other people were more sympathetic regarding the mc, and although my ttc took two more years, my age wasn't really a factor as I was probably the healthiest I had been in years (and hope to get back to that soonish, e.g. pregnancy weight!), and I met loads of ladies in their mid-40s who were pregnant, both naturally (as I was) and some with IVF babies.

best wishes

 

[Squiggy]

I'm 34, we are going to start TTC in about June/July/August this year, which means I won't be giving birth until I'm 35.

I think how we are treated vastly depends on the communities we are involved in. Within the lower-class and predominantly Spanish community I am hit with utter shock that I don't have any kids followed by questions as to whether something is "wrong" with me. It's a little insulting.
But middle class people tell me I'm still just a baby myself.
It's all a matter of the immediate social norm.

I have no issue with being a mature adult with a baby in spite of what some might think. I guess I have pride on my side.

 

[Elski]

Nobody really bats an eyelid where I am about having kids 35+. I work in obstetrics too and so many women are having babies later these days that it's just becoming the norm...

 

[Squiggy]

Nobody really bats an eyelid where I am about having kids 35+. I work in obstetrics too and so many women are having babies later these days that it's just becoming the norm...

I, for one, am glad to hear this. I was raised to believe that you make certain sets of achievements (or at least try) before starting a family.
Someone wrote that "they" lowered the age for risks to around 30.
But you are right, while we have always suffered with teen pregnancies, we are now starting to see women that are waiting until they are our age, which is nice. I think it will counter-attack (or at least balance) all the kids raising kids to be inconsiderate and disrespectful because their parents never grew up themselves. But that's just my opinion.