Dilemma: should I give up?

[wantb502]

My baby is going to be one month on Monday after being born 3 weeks early and only 5 pounds. We have struggled with bf from the beginning. He had trouble latching BC of my flat nipples, uncoordinated suck, and small mouth and not opening wide to latch. We started using nipple shields and that worked okay but last week we started taking them away. He would latch directly on my breast about 60% of the time after relatching and relatching. We have to keep trying and sometimes it takes 45 mins just for him to latch with or without the shield. We are both so frustrated. We've been to the LC three times and will go back today. I wanted to bf so bad but this is making me hate it and start to dislike spending time with the baby because it seems that all of our time is trying to bf!

I guess I want to know if you guys would recommend to keeping trying to bf or to say screw it and pump and bottle feed? I know he was so small when he was born and my nips are flat.... Will it get better or I'm I going to continue to hate this?

 

[sunnylove]

My son was 2 and a half pounds when he was born and we are exclusively breastfeeding now. My advice would be to NOT give up. I was so scared to nurse him after he came home from the hospital because he "had to get a certain amount" that I stopped trying to nurse, and he had latch issues too. So I bottle fed him EBM for about one and a half months, and I finally said that I was done pumping and bottling him, and we just started nursing and he has done great. Those tiny babies can have trouble, and you may have to bottle for a bit until they get bigger, but they will get it. Don't give up!

 

[calliebaby]

Sometimes pumping a bit before you nurse can help make your nipples come out a bit more. This might help with latching easier.

 

[Juicyg]

Only give up if you want to and if you feel its right for you.
My advice would be to stick to it as it does get easier. I had to use nipple shields at the beginning as my lo chewed my nipples apart (sorry tmi). We also introduced a bottle of expressed milk at 1week old as I was ready to give up so did that so I could get a break.
I gave myself mini goals too,first one was 2weeks,then 6 wks,then 3months and now i dont wanna give up lol!x

 

[seaweed eater]

I can understand why you would want to give up. What you are going through sounds so frustrating!

IMO, if it is to the point where you are thinking of quitting, just keep going with the nipple shields. Monitor LO's diapers and weight gain to make sure he is getting enough, but if the shields were working, BF with shields is certainly better for him than no BF at all. That's if YOU want to continue, of course.

 

[Nicolalove353]

Try not to give up. My son had latch issues and I also have flat nipples. Bf has been such a struggle physically and emotionally. He is now 3 months and I am extremely happy that we stuck with bf. we also needed a shield but was able to wean him off. As his mouth got bigger, I noticed his latch got better. Now our struggle is with supply not latch. I had to supplement with formula at 4 days old because of latch issues and I wasn't producing enough through pumping.

It still is a struggle and I still have thoughts about quitting and there are still years but it is all worth it. I can't say how long I will nurse but I'm still hanging in there. It it is just a latch issue I would stick with it. Your babies latch should get better as he grows. I noticed my babies latch getting better at 6-8 weeks. Hang in there and good luck!

 

[ttcforaminius]

Hi I just wanted to first of all say your not alone. I have a 7 week old and although he was born full term and a good weight, I really struggled to the point of wanting to quit and also not enjoying feeding my son. I had a cracked nipple on the right and mastitis in my other boob. (Which have only just started to settle after so long!)

I was getting very anxious around feeding time and would dread my husband telling me he thought our son needed feeding every time he cried. Someone said to me "baby would rather have a happy mum than a stressed mum so if you want to bottle feed, feed him that way"....made me think a lot about what was best for my son and myself rather than society.

At the end of the day you do what's best for you and your baby and ignore what anyone else thinks of your choice. I still breast feed my son now but also give him a bottle of formula as his last feed and he is doing great. That was what I felt was best for us.

Sending you lots of love xxxxx

 

[wantb502]

Thank you everyone. It is so frustrating and I know I'm experiencing a little depression because of this. I went to the LC today (I've seen her 3 times already). She said to only offer him the breast wih shield because he is not ready for the nipple sans shield. She said to offer the breast but dont force it and its okay to give him a bottle of expressed milk. I luckily have been pumping 3-4 times a day and get about 4 oz each time. I also have a stash beginning in the freezer. I feel better about everything and have decided I will keep trying to breast feed but I have decided to be okay with a bottle and if I need to pump and bottle feed, so be it. It's still breast milk and I am trying my hardest. As TTC said... I'd rather enjoy my time with my baby instead of hating the alone (bf) time. I want to enjoy being around my baby. I appreciate everyone's input. Thank you)