Disciplining other peoples kids

[BabyJayne]

I think there is a difference between disciplining someone else's child and not allowing them to do certain things in your home.
If my friend's children are here and they pick something up they are not supposed to, I will say something along the lines of "No, put that down please honey - it's not for little girls", or something similar to suit a similar situation - if they are hitting each other with things that are mine/Madeline's, I would feel within my rights to take the things away saying something like "If you can't play nicely with these then I'm going to have to put them away".

Anything further is up to the parent - but stopping the action by removing things or asking them not to do it is different from shouting/naughty step or any other actions of "discipline".

I would like to think it would never get to that stage with Madeline and that I would step in first (she's too little to cause mayhem and mean it - but it won't be long) - but if I didn't or was in the loo etc. I would be happy for my friends to deal with it in the way I mentioned above.

 

[CarlyP]

Yes, I think so.

If I have my nephews over and they can get very rowdy (as can my DS) then I do have to set boundaries, they don't always follow them which do result in turning Xbox off or taking toys away etc.

 

[TwilightAgain]

I'd be too shy to discipline other peoples kids, i'd secretly be hoping the parents would say something. If they were doing something which would damage my property or harm themselves/each other then i'd step in though. How are the kids ever going to learn respect if their parents are terrible examples? I wouldn't invite them back, nail the door shut

 

[hopeandpray]

I don't think that you have a right to discipline another persons child. Obviously if that child is beating yours up you can move them away or if they are breaking something you can take if from them. I think that you have the right to tell a parent that their child is breaking the rules of your house and suggest to them that they discipline them.
Of course it is different if you are regularly left in charge of a child. In that case you need to sort out rules with the parent.

 

[kaiser246]

edit

 

[rubywoo77]

I would never discipline anyone else's children however if they came to my house and started trashing the place then I would ask them to stop however difficult it would be for me.
My husband's nephews are very unruly (not in their own home I hasten to add), when they come over I have the younger one trying to slide down my bannister (or climbing on my kitchen worktop to search the cupboards for sweets!) whilst the older one is doing keepy uppy (think thats what it is called) in my living room. They are a lot older than my LO and to be honest their behaviour not only turns my house into a tip and makes my LO over-excited but it also pisses me off something chronic, I always ask them to stop and try and do it nicely, tbh I am lot more polite than I want to be.

When their mum is there she kind of makes half hearted attempts to get them to stop, but tbh she just lets them get on with whatever they are doing (like kicking a football against my conservatory windows!) she would never allow them to behave like that at home but somehow it's ok in mine so I always say something, I know it pisses her off but needs must.

 

[Tantan]

With my neice and nephew I have disciplined (not slap but tell off) them and I will do again. they don't listen to my sister most of the time so I do just step in. But then again she would do the same with my kids.

 

[LeeBee]

Reminds me of a time when I took my son to an indoor play area, and this little boy spit in his face. His mother was standing right there watching and did nothing! I didn't say anything, just wiped my sons face off, but seriously... who just stands there and does nothing when their kid does that?!

 

[moomin_troll]

id of had a right go at the mother if someone spat in zanes face! god thats disgusting

 

[ShanandBoc]

I think as an adult you have a right to discipline someone elses child, esp in your own home, if the parents will not. How else will they learn respect? And by discipline i mean asking them to stop something that is dangerous to either themselves or someone else or if they are damaging property.

For those that say no they wouldnt, what if you were watching a child and their parents were not present? You would have to, you cant just let a kid run wild. Even in school they will be disciplined so a child had better get used to respecting their elders and being asked to behave by adults other than their parents. Just my opinion

 

[KittyVentura]

I would. Just a firm "No, that's not to be played with, please sit down"

Incidentally I'd also ask the parents to intervene. I think it's shocking that they'd allow their children to misbehave and then mock your own parenting for trying to control their unruly runts!

xx

 

[twinkle1975]

I sometimes have to do it when I'm running toddler group if a parent has been asked to stop their child hurting someone else or breaking something - it's a hard thing to do but sometimes it has to be done!

To be honest I had to hold myself back in Asda today - there was a Grandma with her 2 grandsons who were around 7 and 11. They were really playing up and in the end she had to hold on to the younger one by the wrist to stop him from barging into people. At one point in the queue he said to her 'get off me or I'll kick you' - I think if he had I'd have had to say something!