Do you ever have to leave your baby cry?

[Starlight32]

I don't shower unless she is napping in her crib which is right outside the bathroom. I constantly peak out of the shower to make sure she is still asleep! Using the toilet is stressful though because we don't have one on our main floor where I'm typically with her during the day, so I have to out her down and go up or down a level.

 

[Witchrose]

Oh, sure. I'll join the chorus of, "of course, it depends on the cry." But if it's just him acting up, neither I nor my husband feel at all bad about letting him cry a bit. We're older, so if we're influenced by anything, it's of the time we were raised. (both born in the 70s) I honestly can't relate to half the things that a lot of other mothers seem to be stressing about nowadays. And I'm not worried about making sure my son is happy/getting his way every second. That's not realistic. I'd rather focus on having him develop a strength and grace to deal with life.

Of course, how long/often is about to *you*. What you feel comfortable with. Just don't feel bad if you do, because there's no reason to.

 

[lau86]

Not sure how you ladies with more than one do it! I have one and I'm finding it challenging to use the bathroom lol. I only put her down if she is fed and changed, she's crying because I had to out her down to do something quickly. I still feel guilty though and wish a carrier could work for us. I'm hoping it will in the near future.

I felt exactly the same with one! Having your first is the biggest challenge imo

 

[laila 44]

Oh, sure. I'll join the chorus of, "of course, it depends on the cry." But if it's just him acting up, neither I nor my husband feel at all bad about letting him cry a bit. We're older, so if we're influenced by anything, it's of the time we were raised. (both born in the 70s) I honestly can't relate to half the things that a lot of other mothers seem to be stressing about nowadays. And I'm not worried about making sure my son is happy/getting his way every second. That's not realistic. I'd rather focus on having him develop a strength and grace to deal with life.

Of course, how long/often is about to *you*. What you feel comfortable with. Just don't feel bad if you do, because there's no reason to.

I love this! So well said! Agreed 100%!

 

[zorak]

Honestly yes and that's not just because I have two. Obviously it depends on the cry but I refuse to be one of those Mothers that doesn't do things like shower, pee or eat because bubs is grisly. I firmly believe a happy healthy Mum is less likely to be stressed and end up with post natal depression. I did baby wear but rarely did it at home. My boys are both happy and well developed so I don't see the harm.

 

[mumandco]

No I don't let my baby cry..at 4 days old she hasn't had much chance to yet but I didn't let any of my others cry either. If baby wakes or grizzles I will put whatever I'm doing down and tend to her first. Or just try and juggle everything so that baby isn't crying. I babywear so often had my ds3 strapped to me to get on with being a sahm to my other children and will do the same for this little lady.
I have no issues in people who do let their children cry as you have to do what works for you and your family,but for me hearing my los cry hurts too much to ignore and stresses me out.

 

[pinklightbulb]

Yes. With two other kids it just has to happen sometimes.

 

[Nibblenic]

Yeah, I have two so sometimes if the bigger one needs me she has to be put down, shes fair self sufficient though. However if im alone, making bottles/sterilizing etc She will be put down and she'll cry. I try and talk to her to reassure her im still about but in reality she cant not cry at all. Sometimes youve got to poop

 

[noon_child]

I never had to juggle more than one kid but I know that I nearly always went to the toilet with my baby, often she was in the bouncing chair outside the open door of the toilet so she could see me, but if she was full on crying I'd have to juggle holding her and peeing at the same time. I never did chores during the first few months because, as I saw it, prior to being a mum I was at work all day and me and DH did chores when we got home. After the birth my "job" was being LOs mum so chores could wait till my DH was back from work or it was the weekend.

However I did find cooking a problem and didn't eat as much as I should have, which wasn't good for me. I'm short so could never baby wear and prep food as I couldn't reach the counter with her strapped to me! I ended up doing mad dashes between rooms at first, then set up a playpen in our kitchen (although she still hated it anytime my back was turned!) which helped her feel safe and me get food cooked.

 

[laura109]

Yes definitely. Dont be hard on yourself. If they are in a safe place then they are absolutely fine. Nobody can hold them all the time. My sil was very hatd on herself with this and carried her round in a sling to make cups of tea and everything. Also she had her on her knee when she was eating her tea and struggling every night to eat. I think it's important to start as you mean to go on. If holding them all the time makes you happy and you can work around that than great. But if not them theres nothing wrong with them having to let you get on for 15 minutes as long as they are fed comfortable temp wise and not unwell.

They do pull on your heartstrings. At this age its instinct and certainly not to manipulate etc. my daughter at 13 months wanted us to sit in her room every night whilst she fell asleep and it was getting a nightmare taking the best part of an hour and knowing i had pots to do and i needed a shower and to cook tea it was getting pretty difficult so we left her to cry a little and she was fine in a matter of days. I know this is irrelevant to your situation but us mummys have other things to do xx

 

[Starlight32]

Yeah the time it takes to poop is probably the longest I've had to set her down while crying. I'm usually pretty quick with laundry and save sorting and putting away until a better time. We have a swing in our kitchen now that helps me with eating. She tends to get fussy in there after ten minutes so I just try to keep my meals quick.