Do You Let Your Baby Cry?

[Tezzy]

i think to be honest that CIO only works with babies with a certain temperament (sp) we could never leave rhys to CIO, he just got upset and clingy to the point where we are STILL co-sleeping with him... wheras ffion just accepted it and dealt with it really well

 

[marley2580]

It was only from about 10/11 months that we started letting Kaya cry a wee bit before picking her up. Now if I'm busy and she's just being moany or wanting something she's not allowed I tell her later or no - that's when I get the tantrum lol. If she tantrums I ignore it unless she starts throwing things.

 

[taperjeangirl]

If shes properly crying then yep,I'll go to her immediatly.But if she's just whingeing at me then sometimes I'll just let her whinge for a couple of minutes
We've ended up doing cry it out at bedtimes.Not in the way that we put her in her room and ignore her but that we'll put her down and let her cry and go back every 5 minutes increasing to every 10 minutes etc. Its not for everyone but its worked really well for us and after a week of cry it out my little miss slept through in her own cot last night for the first time in about 4 months.
I wouldnt take Ophelia off my OH if she was crying because I think that sometimes babies need to get used to their daddy as the bond isnt as natural if that makes sense..If you keep taking her she wont get used to him.I think if you let your OH hold her and comfort her if she cries she'll eventually see your OH as just as much of a 'safe person' as she sees you,if that makes sense?
xxxxx

Yep makes total sense, I think this is why I am now questioning myself with it

 

[taperjeangirl]

Even a moan and she gets a cuddle

Same here

 

[taperjeangirl]

When i know its a cry because he is hungry ect. Im there straight away doing what he wants. If its an attention cry i dont always go to him because i feel espeshically as a single parent looking after him on my own that he needs to learn he cant always have me there if you get what i mean? and usually within 2-5mins he has stopped the crying and hes happily back playing with whatever he was doing or dropped off to sleep. Sometimes im cooking, washing, doing household stuff and i cant always rush to him and he does need to learn that!

This is what I am thinking i shoudl be doing too, I just need to get over the whole crying bit! It's the sound of it that makes me feel so sad for her, she has a very "feel sorry for me" cry!

 

[taperjeangirl]

I tried CIO out once and it was awful, Joseph just got more and more upset and I ended up getting upset and he was so clingy afterwards. I'm sure it works great for some babies but I can't do it. So now I always go to him when he is crying, if he starts whinging I wait a min to see if he will calm down or start to cry, but as soon as the real crying starts i'm there! I'm definitely not strong enough to leave him crying! x

I don't think I am strong enough either!

I remember one night coming in from work and Daisy had aparently been crying for hours and once I eventually calmed her down she did this little whimpering thing for about an hour afterward, it was soooooo heartbreaking!

 

[missjacey44]

When i know its a cry because he is hungry ect. Im there straight away doing what he wants. If its an attention cry i dont always go to him because i feel espeshically as a single parent looking after him on my own that he needs to learn he cant always have me there if you get what i mean? and usually within 2-5mins he has stopped the crying and hes happily back playing with whatever he was doing or dropped off to sleep. Sometimes im cooking, washing, doing household stuff and i cant always rush to him and he does need to learn that!

This is what I am thinking i shoudl be doing too, I just need to get over the whole crying bit! It's the sound of it that makes me feel so sad for her, she has a very "feel sorry for me" cry!

I do feel sorry for him but i guess we are all able to deal with it diffrently. Im good at blocking things out and i also had to let him cry to get him used to sleeping in his own cot and not in bed with me!

 

[taperjeangirl]

When i know its a cry because he is hungry ect. Im there straight away doing what he wants. If its an attention cry i dont always go to him because i feel espeshically as a single parent looking after him on my own that he needs to learn he cant always have me there if you get what i mean? and usually within 2-5mins he has stopped the crying and hes happily back playing with whatever he was doing or dropped off to sleep. Sometimes im cooking, washing, doing household stuff and i cant always rush to him and he does need to learn that!

This is what I am thinking i shoudl be doing too, I just need to get over the whole crying bit! It's the sound of it that makes me feel so sad for her, she has a very "feel sorry for me" cry!

I do feel sorry for him but i guess we are all able to deal with it diffrently. Im good at blocking things out and i also had to let him cry to get him used to sleeping in his own cot and not in bed with me!

That's the strange thing with Daisy, cos she is so clingy through the day you would expect her to be at night, but I put her in her cot, tuck her in, lightshow and rainforest sounds on and within 5 mins she is sleeping! Very strange but i am not complaining!

 

[the_hug]

Not really cause 9 times out of 10 there is a really good reason why he is crying. Only time i leave him is if i'm in the middle of something.

 

[CamoQueen]

David is so whiny, I have to let him whine in order to get anything done! He'll whine a lot because he's bored or not being held. I pick him up when he cries; 9 times out of 10 I'm there in under a minute. I just wish he'd be content for more than 3 minutes at a stretch!

 

[emma_27]

I sometimes have no choice to let her cry. I try to be as quick as i can to get to her but if ive got Benn that needs feeding or his been to the toliet i have to see to him aswell. Other than that though i dont let her cry im to much of a push over.

 

[MoonMuffin]

Kathryn is a very happy baby, so if she's upset it's usually because she's hungry, tired or has a diaper, so I just take care of whatever she's crying about. If she's whining for no reason (like if she's just doing it for fun) I just leave her, but try to distract her (cause my head can only take so much).

 

[Rachiebaby24]

crying no, whinging yes.....sometimes it needs to be done....."sometimes i cant hold you i need to go the toilet"

 

[Chel]

Jasper is a really happy baby. He's 4 months old and in the mornings (not so much in the afternoon, he goes a bit wonky in the afternoon, so thats mummy and bubby time!) he can play independantly with his toys where we can see each other, but I can be on the computer/cleaning/eating etc and he doesn't mind, for up to an hour at a time, its great! He's so happy to be independant and I love the freedom!

If Jasper starts whining on the floor during a play time I'll look to make sure he's fine - if he's really upset I'll go to him immediately, but if its just fussying and whining I might step out of sight for a moment and he'll often stop because he cant ask for me if he cant see me - once he's stopped whining I go to him and have a chat with him - and he's often REALLY happy to see me if I do that, whereas if I go to him when he's whining, he still whines once I'm with him, until I phsyically pick him up.

I do this out of love though, I want Jasper to learn how to deal with SOME emotions himself. THAT SAID, we're talking about whining, not crying.... he gets cuddles each and every time he cries, because I want him to know and trust in mummies love!

Jasper also CIO to sleep, but half the time he only whimpers as I leave the room and then no another peep.

I feel that by LETTING him cry, he cries LESS!

 

[Novbaby08]

Even a moan and she gets a cuddle

me too! she doesn't even have to be fully awake, then second I hear any noise or see any movement I'm picking her up.

 

[Vickie]

It depends really. Hannah's got a lot of separation anxiety right now so sometimes I HAVE to put her down to run to the washroom quickly and she will usually cry if Stan's not home (sometimes even if he is she cries ) If she's whining no, I look at her and tell her I'm still here and finish up whatever I'm doing and than go to her. I don't want her to use whining to get my attention

 

[mrscookie]

i feel like a really mean mom... I let Lylah cry sometimes for up to 15 mins, she usually falls asleep after that. I only do it when she is full, clean and contented but just wants me because she wants me.. and I do it to let her know she cant have her own way by crying at me, and that I wont come running unless she needs something. I will cuddle her, i cuddle her so much and i love love love our cuddles, but Its just something I read about so am testing it out for now.
xxxx

 

[aj2000]

At night we let will go into our little boy after 2 mins if he's moaning or crying just a bit or straight away if he's shouting or crying loudly.

During the day my LO doesn't like it when I leave the room - he goes "aah, aaah, aaaaaaah!!". He also only plays independently for 10ish minutes at a time and after that he needs a cuddle or a game before playing on his own again. So, sometimes, I do have to let him cry for a few minutes while I go to the loo, wash bottles etc. I keep talking and singing to him though so that he knows he's not being ignored.

Hope this helps

 

[Mrs_Nesbit]

I cant block out a sobbing baby for the life of me. I hear crying babies in shops and I get the urge to pick them up..lol So no, I cant possibly let Sam CIO, a bit of a whinge I can deal with but not a proper cry. Mind you, sometimes his older brother and sister gets there first..They dont like leaving him to cry either. He's got the lot of us on the go

 

[fein&waiting]

I'm normally the same as everyone here, don't let him cry past a moan or will let him cry for a min or so (probably why i can't leave him to sit or go to bed on his own without a dummy) but the last few nights he's been waking a few times for his dummy and at ridiculous hours, not going back to sleep. recently i started letting him cry for a min or so then going in and giving the dummy cos i found it helped him fall asleep, worked for going to sleep but not for the wakings so today gave in and did the 5 min thing, didn't even have to go in cos he fell asleep at 5 mins after major banshee screaming (had to shut 2 doors to make it easier for me to do). After 15 mins, he woke again and screamed like mad but i was pumping so couldn't move, DH stuck dummy in his mouth, he calmed for a min or so. I then went in took the dummy out (trying to wean it from him for the night wakings) and he whinged for 30 secs or so then fell asleep and that was an hr ago!!!!!! Normally has been waking after 30 mins during his day naps. so so pleased. thought it was going to be a major battle. Hoping this works over the next few days. Oops, just realised i had a major ramble, anyway, just to let you know, it's hard listening to the screaming but when i pick him up he's all smiles and so i know it's not harming him