Do you think I've upset these people

[Babushka]

An old family friend came to visit me a few weeks ago & brought over a baby swing for me to loan which her daughter had bought second hand from somewhere. The swing is probably about 12 to 15 years old and is quite dirty, probably kept in many garages over the years. I accepted it very graciously and the mother commented how the daughter had a newer one but wasn't loaning that out, fair enough.

A couple of weeks go by and my sister in the meantime buys me a new one. The daughter writes something on my Fb wall saying we must catch up soon and asks for my address. I message her to give her my address and say thanks for the loan of the swing but my sister has bought me a new one. I've heard nothing back from her and it's been over a week.

Maybe I have to much time on my hands at the moment but I'm wondering if I have offended her. What would you think?

Also, I showed her mother my nursery which I think looks really lovely (all new furniture) and the girl's mother keeps posting nursery pics on Fb of really old cots/cribs & rustic style nursery furniture etc. And, whilst she was visiting my house she kept saying that she hates new stuff & likes everything old.

 

[Equreuil]

It sounds like you politely let her know that you no longer needed to borrow the swing as you had received a new one as a gift. It's not like you had gone out and bought one yourself after getting the old one. If she got offended, it's on her, not you.

As far as her opinions about your nursery, she can stuff them. Everyone has their own tastes, and it sounds like she's trying to passive aggressively force hers on you. Ignore it, maybe set facebook to automatically hide ppicture posts from her so you don't have to see them. It's not like your going to change anything now that you've bought all new furniture.

 

[Mrs.Mcguin]

She loaned it to you...she didn't give it to you. She can't get upset if she realized you wanted one to call your own.

I wouldn't worry too much about it. Since she hasn't replied back to you...just send her another quick message saying you haven't heard back from her and you were wondering when she wanted to get together.

I'm sure she's not offended

Edit to add....as for the nursery thing...Let her have her own opinion because that's all it is. Everyone has their own taste. People give me their option all the time even if I don't like it...I just smile and nod

 

[greenlady]

I don't think they have reason to be upset, maybe the girl just hasn't got back to you yet. I wouldn't actually worry, just take the swing back to her - although if she has her own new one maybe she just doesn't want it.

I would just ignore the mother re the nursery as well.

 

[funinthesun]

No I don't think she could take offence at that.

Sounds to me like she was trying to off load the old swing on you. Why would anyone want a 12-15 year old dirty swing that probably doesn't comply with modern safety standards? The daughter wasn't even using it, she was using a newer one!

 

[Tiffylove]

I have very different beliefs than a lot of others. I don't think you should even worry about whether or not you offended her. You are not responsible for her feelings. You're responsible for being honest and true to yourself. If she got offended that's on her. You can't go through life sensoring yourself according to other people.

The only person you need to answer to is you. You will never please everyone especially now people get hurt over every little thing. Live your life aligned with your values and don't worry about how others take it. You did nothing wrong.

 

[Mum2BKW]

No I don't think she could take offence at that.

Sounds to me like she was trying to off load the old swing on you. Why would anyone want a 12-15 year old dirty swing that probably doesn't comply with modern safety standards? The daughter wasn't even using it, she was using a newer one!

^^ What she said