Does it make me a bad mum??

[Coopers_mummy]

Hello ladies. I'm 22 an have a gorgeous 3 year old son. I was told I was infertile after him so was shocked to find myself pregnant a few months ago. I am now 16 weeks pregnant with my second. FOB wanted to be involved for about a week then decided he didn't wanna give up his sports car, made it obvious he felt I wasn't good enough for him as I don't wear designer names and didn't want a 'fat' gf when I got a bump. So he walked and I found myself a single mum again which does not bother me a bit as I love doing it on my own and I'm told by family and even strangers that meet my son that I'm doing a good job.

My problem is that recently I have started talking to a new guy. He works in the local coffee shop and I had been checking him out for months. Then we got chatting and we swapped numbers. We have been texting every day for a few weeks plus chatting in the coffee shop too. A few days ago he asked what I was up to after he finished work and if I had my son I said nothing and yes I did. He sai he wanted to take us out for burgers. I agreed. We went out and had a great time and he was great with my son and my son loved him. After he took my son to get some sweets we then walke to the bus stop. As we went our Seperate ways he kissed me goodnight. Minutes later I received a text saying your beautiful. I really like you both xx

The problem is we both really like each other but the pregnancy freaks him out. We have decided to just see each other so like friends but kisses and cuddles when my son isn't around, then once baby is here give it a go or if he is still freaked out by the situation just stay friends. This is perfect for me as I get the attention and company without having the stress of a new relationship and a three year old.

My question. Am I in the wrong?? Should I be seeing anyone while pregnant. I would never have looked for a guy while pregnant but this has just sort of happened

 

[gracexxx]

I don't really think this is wrong, as long as your a good mum and you sound brilliant and your son doesn't get confused or upset about anything, I say do what you like just make sure your son and unborn baby remain number one... Which I'm sure you have every intention of doing xx

 

[Coopers_mummy]

Thank you for your reply. My son and baby will always come first. Men will usually come and go I only get one chance to do an amazing job with their up bringing

 

[Jade--x]

I don't think it makes your awful at all. When I was pregnant with my oldest I left FOB really early on in the pregnancy and was just harrassed the rest of it. It made me turn to my friends more than ever, and my friends were pretty much all guys as girls just don't seem to like me. One of my good friends was someone I was in a brief meaningless relationship with before FOB for what must have been 2 weeks when I didn't feel ready for a relationship it was progressing too fast for me and we just stayed good friends. He told me whilst I was pregnant he was in love with me and knew it was the worst time to tell me but he couldn't keep it to himself and we went on things progressed to having a relationship whilst I was pregnant. It creeped me out me being pregnant more than it did him he was wanted to be involved and he told everyone the baby was his, he took my baby on as his own and he was amazing. We kept to kisses and cuddles too, nights in on the sofa with a DVD, I was too ill to go out anywhere so it was all we could really do.
Like PP said as long as your children are number one and it goes without saying they always will be you're doing nothing wrong. You're allowed a life too x

 

[Dezireey]

I don't think it's wrong at all. Just go with the flow and see how he is. I would just be cautious not to give your heart to quickly to him because of the delicate situation you are in as he might freak out and yet again he might not. He sounds nice though, have fun

 

[Coopers_mummy]

Thank you sooo much ladies. All this because I know my family would freak out with me if they knew we were more than friends. After 3 years in an abusive relationship and FOB leaving coz I wasn't good enough for him I was at a low point but feels a life time ago now. He makes me happy. I smile the whole time we are together and always smile at his texts too. He tells me I'm beautiful several times a day which I have never had before its always been sexy, hot, fit which isn't the same. If anything this is probably good for my kids too. I'm soo happy since I met him I seem to have more energy and patience which is better for my boy and my body seems happier an healthier too which is good for baby. My babies will always come first but like jade said I'm allowed a life too

 

[jogami]

Enjoy it! I think it's perfectly healthy and natural and you should not feel bad at all! As long as you are putting your son first then screw what anybody else thinks or says. If your arrangement works for you then what a bonus!