don't what to feel/think/do??

[Petal]

Hello ladies, this is my first post although I have been a bit of a lurker on this site for a while, I hope you won't mind me joining you. I'll introduce myself - my name is Rosie and I just turned 30. DH and I have been TTC for 16 months. My cycle is very regular (25 days) and at first we thought we would just wait and see what happened. After about 8/9 months of just monitoring CM with no hint of BFP, I started using OPK's. After 12 months I went to GP who did the CD21 blood test and confirmed I was O'ing. DH had SA done and all was normal.

I am so confused as I don't know what could be the reason why I haven't conceived. DH works shifts so I can't say that every month we have BD'd at the right time. Yesterday I found out that my best friend is preg on the same day that AF arrived - I was so upset it was all I could do to get through the day till 5pm, go home and cried my eyes out all night. I was a mess at work today as well and looked like I been punched as my eyes were so puffy with dark circles.

I really don't know if I can cope with the tests/scans etc and I am scared as I don't really know what can be done for us (as I am O'v regularly and DH SA came back fine) maybe blocked tubes, thin womb lining??? I don't know. And also the waiting times are so long.... I just don't know.

In a way I also feel like why should I have to go through all that and other people (many of whom don't even want a baby) get preg without even thinking about it? I thought I believed in fate, but if that's the case then maybe I should just accept mine is not be a mum?? I guess I'm saying I don't know if I have the strength/will to fight for it at this moment in time.

So sorry for the long post but I had all this inside and as I haven't told anyone except my (now preg) best friend that we were TTC, I have no-one else to talk to.

 

[missmarls]

Hi hun,
I'm sorry to hear about the problems you're having ...I think the best thing you can do is talk to your Dr about your options ask for an HSG test at least so that they can check if your tubes are open. I opted to have a lap/dye/d&c done all at once, and I'm glad I did as the Dr found endometriosis. My day21 tests showed I ovulated but when I had the operation, the endo was wrapped around my ovaries so no eggie could get past it. He also removed some polyps in my uterus that could possibly keep an egg from implanting, so now our only issue is a low sperm count (which hopefully has improved, will find out when DH does repeat SA).
This is a great site to get some helpful advice as everyone has different experiences so can give you advice based on what they've been through.
I hope you find the answers you need soon,

 

[Arcanegirl]

Hi Petal,
If you are ovulating normally and there are no probs with your OH then the next step should be a laparoscopy or hsg to check for blocked tubes and if that comes back normal you will possbily be offered IUI.

I had teh same prob, everything was normal, no known problems yet after 3 years we still hadnt concieved.
It took two goes of IUI but we got there

 

[Petal]

thanks for the support ladies, I have already gained so much knowledge from this site, so thanks to all who post. Can you give me an idea of how long it would take to get an appointment for those tests?
I spoke to my BF today and she was v supportive and made me feel more positive about what 2009 might have in store for me.

Wishing everyone a happy and healthy 2009 and hope your wishes come true.
xxx

 

[Arcanegirl]

You would need to get a referral from your gp to a fertility specialist and go from there.
the area i lived had a 9 month waiting list for the referral but it might not be as bad for you. Once i had got past the 9 months and got things moving, everything else was done quickly.

 

[Farie]

Dont be afraid to go to the Dr and ask for some more test Either your Dr will order a HSG (Hysterosalpingogram), ultra-sound etc or she'll pass you onto a f/s ....
Every Dr is different, mine is managing my case herself.

It never hurts to ask.
My last appt yielded 3 months worth of Clomid (50g to help kick start my rather lazy overies) and the promise of a HSG being booked. I'm pretty wimpy with tests (3 cycles of 21 day bloods, CD2 bloods, FSH and Prolactin tests etc left me rather queasy!) but I reckon it's worth it.

Any Q feel free to ask any of us, most peeps in the section have been TTC for over 12 months and/or are having assisted conception.

Good luck

 

[JASMAK]

I had an HSG the following month. I would also try to see when you are Oing, and see if you have a luteal phase defet (low progesterone).

 

[miel]

good luck sweetie ...

i think for me once i made the step to accept the fact that for some reasons we were not getting our BFP like other do so fast ( ttc for 15 month ) i really looked forward to do the tests ...it felt like i was more proactive....anyway i did the blood tests etc( i have a 26 days cycle , i do ovulated and have a regular cycle as well ) anyway after the blood work we did the HSG to check the tubes ....my tubes were fine but they notice a shape like a bubble on the picture so i went in for a ultrasound ...we did find out that i have a polyp ...i am having it remove on January 9th...if i did not do the tests i will be still trying each month with a 2% chance to concieve because of the polyp instead of a regular woman that have the 20% each month ...

don't be scare about starting tests they are pretty simple ...

 

[bonfloss]

Hi Petal
We are in a similar situation although DH's SA showed slightly low motility but GP was not concerned. We were referred to fertility specialist back in Oct and we have first appt in Jan. We are in Scotland so will probably be different if you are down South. I am assuming that next step will be a check of my tubes. It's bloody awful and I know exactly how you feel as my sister in law announced her pregnancy on xmas day after a few months of trying but you are not alone so try to hang in there and think of it as progress in the right direction.
xxx

 

[rachelle1975]

Hey chick

Has your GP suggested referring you to the FS yet? When we got referred it took 3 weeks to get a letter back. The 1st appt was scheduled for 3 months later BUT i rang and said i would happily take any cancellations and we got 1 for a month after. HSG and internal ultrasound was done and results the same day.

Hope you get your referral and you get some answers if the elusive doesn't appear x

 

[Puddleduck]

Hi Petal,

Sounds like you are in a similar situ to myself. I am 34 and DH 33 and still trying for our first baby after over 2 years of trying. Have done the 21 day bloods and SA all came back normal. I have regular 27-28 day cycles and a normal 14 day luteral phase. So we have at the moment what the experts call 'unexplained infertility' what a lovely phrase ?? Not. Anyway our last appointment with my GP resulted in having a go with Clomid for 3 months at 50mg same as Farie. If this doesnt work then it's back to our GP who said he will refer us to a FS. Was really hoping that we wouldnt need all the tests as I am a bit of a wimp and dread the thought but we want this so badly. got me this morning with a vengence after our 2nd round of Clomid so we have one last attempt.

If I was you I would go back to your GP and ask for a referal to do some tests our have a go with Clomid if he will prescribe it for you.

Dont give up, good luck hun. You just need some answers and once you have them there should be a path you can follow.

Good luck x

 

[Petal]

Girls, you are all so supportive, it brings a lump in my throat when I think of how complete strangers can be so supportive of each other....It also makes me wish I had bitten the bullet and posted sooner.

I am actually in SE Glasgow so am guessing from what your saying that the waiting times are between 3-9 months???
I will make an appointment with the GP on Monday as they will be closed on the 2nd, and will let you know how I get on. I might see about gettiing an HSG test done privately if that would be quicker - I understand it costs about 350 quid??

Thanks again for all your support and advice.
xx

 

[hayz1981]

Good luck with your GP appointment. Let us know how you get on.

I hate to wait for 3 months for my HSG (ie. I phoned up the first and second time I got AF and they couldnt get me in. Third time I got an appointment - in my area they try to make sure everyone gets seen by their third cycle.

Lots of to you xx

 

[Petal]

Hi, just an update as I have now been to see GP to discuss our next steps. He was going to refer me to the Gyny unit the Southern General hosp but then changed his mind, and decided I would be eligible for a referral straight to the ACS unit at the Glasgow Royal Infirmary. Is this good? He said the wait to see a consultant at the Southern General was around 2-3 mths, don't know about the GRI. The other alternative is to go private, but of course the cost...
so now I just wait to get my referral letter from the GRI - I hope the wait is not too long, if so I might see about getting the HSG test done privately because if there is a problem I couldn't handle the waiting.

There is a really lovely bunch of people on here, and it is great to be able to share with people who know what I'm going through. Heard the old "just relax, it will happen when it's meant to happen" crap too many times... There are too many people who just assume that you come off the pill and you will fall preg pretty much straight away. Not that I ever have done, but never ever will I say to anyone "so when are you having kids" etc, because you just don;t know what personal battles people are going through.

Anyway, on CD11 of 25 today, so should OV on CD14. Just spent 100 quid on OPKs and HPTs on the internet, so will keep trying...
I hate that phrase!!!