DS needs breastfeeding to go back to sleep--help!

[ChocolateC]

This is all probably my fault. But my DS has been a tall, skinny baby from birth, and I've been trying to fatten him up by nursing on demand all the time, whenever he wants. I don't mind during the day, but at night he uses me as a human pacifier.

I've tried a normal pacifier and he just spits it out. I don't know how to force him to take it. I also don't want to get up even more during the night to put it in his mouth!

I've tried cuddling him to sleep and it works about 1 out of 10 times. Otherwise, he just cries more until he gets fed.

I'm getting tired of waiting for him to get over his need to night-feed by himself and am ready to try some sort of night-weaning strategy. With my DD it wasn't such a problem at this age because she only fed about twice a night, which I found manageable, and went back to sleep immediately after each feed.

Any suggestions?? Anyone else in the same boat?? I want to sleep more than 2 hours at one time...

 

[minties]

It's totally normal, all mine have done it and there was nothing I could do to stop it.

He's using you like a mother - not a pacifier. I don't mean that to sound as pompous as it does, but a pacifier replaces the boob, not the other way around.

 

[jessmke]

I agree he sounds very normal. Breastfeeding on demand is how you are supposed to feed so you haven't created any problems there. Honestly I think your little guy is way too young for night weaning. I know how exhausting it can be, I am still up 3-5 times a night with my 11 month old. Night weaning doesn't mean he will stop waking in the night, he likely will continue to wake for comfort, or due to seperation anxiety, or because of developmental leaps, etc. night weaning may just result in you taking away the one thing that will get him back off to sleep quickly. We tried to night wean my daughter at 10 months old, she continued to wake just as frequently at night but was up for much longer because I wasn't nursing to get her back to sleep so we all ended up losing a lot more sleep. After a week I conceded that she wasn't ready and I went back to feeding her when she woke at night. I spoke with my doctor about it and he doesn't recommend any attempts at night weaning before baby is a year old so we are going to wait until she is a bit older. Sleeping long stretches at night is a developmental milestone just like walking and talking, you can't force it to happen before baby is ready.

 

[ChocolateC]

Great points, thank you. I get sucked into these websites that say "your baby should be doing blah blah blah" and wonder what's wrong when there's nothing wrong. Also I'm really learning that one kid is not like another!

 

[MindUtopia]

He's so little yet. Mine wasn't breastfeeding still at 5 months, but she definitely needed a feed to go back to sleep when she woke. We just went with it. She started to go back to sleep on her own and dropped all night feeds without us having to do anything around 9 months. She still woke up multiple times a night for a cuddle, but it was quick and since we bedshared anyway, it was easy and I didn't really even fully wake up.

 

[marmoset]

Great points, thank you. I get sucked into these websites that say "your baby should be doing blah blah blah" and wonder what's wrong when there's nothing wrong. Also I'm really learning that one kid is not like another!

It's so easy to get sucked in by those isn't it? It sounds to me like you're doing a terrific job. Hang in there, the lack of sleep is rough I know.

 

[yazzy]

Lack of sleep is hard but I'm in the same boat. Currently led in bed with my 13 month old attached to me.
Sometimes we just need to hear it's normal and they do all grow out of it eventually.
I've tried just cuddling him back to sleep but it doesn't really work and we all end up more tired.

 

[babyjan]

Yep my 7 month old does this. It would be nice if he got settle himself to sleep but I'll just wait lol

 

[Left wonderin]

My almost 8 month old wakes 3-5 times per night too and won't drop off without a feed . Its much easier to feed her and she goes back without a fuss than not so ill be feeding as long as she needs it ill be a walking / talking zombie but she will be happy and well rested