Elope or wedding?
- Thread starter Kiki1993
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Kiki1993
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Not sorted it at all, we can't make a decision.
I'm so angry. We originally planned on gretna, but my brother and mum and sister (so that would mean all my neices and nephews couldnt go) and they said they wouldn't spend 30 in petrol to go.
We then decided edinburgh which is less than an hour drive 40 on train and it is 10 minute walk from the station ... once again ... thats too far for them. If they can't make the fucking effort to travel for less than an hour why do i even want them there at all? I explain well im paying for 3 course meal for everyone, drinks, a good night etc and having it there saves me like 1500 if not more instea dof having it in our town and they were like yeah but your guests are all gonna have to spend a tenner to get there and then pay to stay near it if they want to drink... i then said the train is close by and i know 4 people that do not drink so they can be designated drivers and car pool, still they think it is too much for them to do.
I know this sounds so immature of me it just really hurts that i'm the first to be getting married and not one member of my family can be bothered to make any effort.
It's not only that, but when OH parents said they want to contribute 500 to it my mum said in a huffy voice:
"oh well i guess that means im going to have to help too" and rolled her eyes.
Not only that, but they jsut seem to not be interested in anything to do with our day at all.
I'm so angry. We originally planned on gretna, but my brother and mum and sister (so that would mean all my neices and nephews couldnt go) and they said they wouldn't spend 30 in petrol to go.
We then decided edinburgh which is less than an hour drive 40 on train and it is 10 minute walk from the station ... once again ... thats too far for them. If they can't make the fucking effort to travel for less than an hour why do i even want them there at all? I explain well im paying for 3 course meal for everyone, drinks, a good night etc and having it there saves me like 1500 if not more instea dof having it in our town and they were like yeah but your guests are all gonna have to spend a tenner to get there and then pay to stay near it if they want to drink... i then said the train is close by and i know 4 people that do not drink so they can be designated drivers and car pool, still they think it is too much for them to do.
I know this sounds so immature of me it just really hurts that i'm the first to be getting married and not one member of my family can be bothered to make any effort.
It's not only that, but when OH parents said they want to contribute 500 to it my mum said in a huffy voice:
"oh well i guess that means im going to have to help too" and rolled her eyes.
Not only that, but they jsut seem to not be interested in anything to do with our day at all.
Some advice I was given when I got engaged many years ago was to do what pleases you and your fiancé. You can't please everyone and if you try to no one will be happy. If do what you want then at least 2 people will be happy.
I tell my friends when they get engaged it's your day so do it your way.
If pander to others you'll not have the day you want and hopefully you'll only be doing it this time.
My mum wanted us to get married near where my family live and for me to invite family members I had nothing to do with. We opted to get married abroad and stood firm on our invite list. I have no regrets. It was an amazing day.
You're right though, only you and you OH can decide. Good luck deciding and planning
I tell my friends when they get engaged it's your day so do it your way.
If pander to others you'll not have the day you want and hopefully you'll only be doing it this time.
My mum wanted us to get married near where my family live and for me to invite family members I had nothing to do with. We opted to get married abroad and stood firm on our invite list. I have no regrets. It was an amazing day.
You're right though, only you and you OH can decide. Good luck deciding and planning
Kiki1993
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Well if we do what makes us happy i know what we want to do, but it would break my heart if my family didnt come or complain about coming when they're there. I think i would have to ask them to leave if they did but i don't see me enjoying my day if i cant see my family, its suppose to be 2 families joining to be 1 so i kinda think they have to be there! Like it or lump it i guess if it does cause lots of problems we will have to pay train fares or something ... i just hope we find a cheap deal in my town tbh, it is the only way i can guarentee no whining and them complaining about the travel ... it limits my choices to 4 hotels and they are all pretty pricey but maybe they will do a package closer to the time? There was one that was something like £5000 for everything but thats our whole budget gone on the venue and food .. they incude cars/photographer and deco as well but we wouldn't have any money for dress/rings and kilt. 
