Emotional Abuse...

[LonelyAngelx]

ever since i had kids with babys dad hes changed into a compelete asshole, ive latly realised from the signs that hes being emotionally abusive towards me, he controls me, we are not together (and never have been) long story which i hate telling but before i fell pregnant we were so so close he made me feel really special, now he makes me feel worthless, he speaks to me like shit, controls how i spend my money, and if iwanna go out and get a job (im on benefits) he goes off the rails and walks off in a huff, he gets jealous if i go out and meet other blokes... he doesnt want me and no one else to have me... hes a control freak... i dnno what to do, im not scared of him cos hell hit me cos he wudnt but im scared of the arguements how hate the idea of him talking to me like crap... he really is puttin me down dont get me wrong i LOVE him to peices and love his company when we are gettin along and when hes in a good mood its makes me feel good but when hes had a bad day he walks through my front door and makes me feel like crap...
its not healthy for me or the kids

 

[Hunbun]

It really isn't healthy for you or your kids.

Tbh it sounds to me like you would be better without him. You have your own life and your kids lifes to enjoy and he is stopping that.

You should put your foot down and if you want to get a job, go and get one. Its not up to him. When he talks to you in a way you don't like, tell him its unacceptable and you aren't putting up with it anymore. If he isn't careful he is going to lose you from his life.

I know its hard but you need to take control.
Good luck

 

[LonelyAngelx]

Thanks hun, i know i need to put my foot down but i just cant.. im joining a group 2mow about learning to stand up for myself, so hopfully if he starts to be a jerk ill stand up to him before we had kids we were very close and now its like hes a compeletly differant person, this makes me regret having the kids cos i want the old him back...i know its selfish to say but i REALLY miss him

 

[Hunbun]

Awww I'm sure you do miss him

Try to keep in mind that it is him that is acting this way, nobody is making him. Having kids might have brought it out of him, but it was in there all along. If it wasn't the LO's that started it, it probably would have been something else.

At least this way you have your wonderful children to show for it. And you never know, once you start standing up for yourself and showing him you won't allow him to treat you this way he might change back. He might finally realise how he is acting and what he is going to lose.