Ex-boss being awkward; not sure how to approach this. Help!

[nightkd]

I came over to America intending to go back to the UK (and work) after a week. Well I decided to stay in the end and contacted work.

I asked if I could be granted 2 months unpaid leave to sort things out (my mum had threatened me previously with "If you come back you won't have a home to come back to" it was relatively empty, but I just couldn't be bothered with the constant risk of losing my home!!). Well my line-manager came up with some bullshit which didn't make any sense as an excuse for not letting me have the unpaid leave - I wasn't expecting her to give it to me anyway, but she could've just said it rather than coming up with some lame excuse...

So, I went on and said okay, thanks for the opportunity, but I won't be able to come back then.

She accepted my resignation and wished me luck for the future.

Well, now I need her for my Green Card application. I literally just need her to write a letter saying that she confirms I quit on X date, it was unexpected, plus a couple of reasons she was expecting me back - eg we had just discussed how I could improve in my job (yearly review) I had just applied for a higher position and been for tests/interview, had just ordered equipment for my desk - stuff like that...

She's being awkward. I sent her an email requesting this information and apologising again for my sudden departure, because I do feel really bad...I miss my job as well... Well, she didn't reply. I sent another email (9 days later) with the same content, politely suggesting that my first email hadn't got through to her. She responded the next day with "Sorry I am waiting for a response on how to reply" and that she'd be off for a week, so it wouldn't be until July 1st earliest.... Well it's July 12th now and I have still heard nothing back. TBH I'm just pissed off with how rude she was (not replying at all to my first message) and that she's had to ask someone what to say???

I understand she may be pissed - but I hadn't received any training and they'd just got a load more new people in (who should've been in to help me and allow me to have some training about 2/3 months before I left!) who would have been trained..it was just an awful set up all around really.

So basically, how can I politely remind her again? I NEED answers ASAP - if I get married, apply for Green Card and she refuses to supply me with a letter - I'm screwed! Even if it just said "Charlotte left on X date unexpectedly" it would be a LOT better than nothing!

I've started with "Hope you had a good week off." now I need to ask what the f*ck is going on...but in a way that won't piss her off more.

 

[Pyrrhic]

Don;t bother with her, that's the sort of information you can get from a head office human resources department tbh. She sounds very unhelpful.

 

[princess_bump]

hmm, tough one hon, i would probably send her an e-mail saying, i no my departure was unexpected and perhaps caused a few problems at work, but i do apologise and really hope you can...

other than that, not sure hon x

 

[princess_bump]

Don;t bother with her, that's the sort of information you can get from a head office human resources department tbh. She sounds very unhelpful.

yep thats an even better idea, e-mail HR instead x

 

[nightkd]

How do you think I should put the email to HR? And....sounds stupid, but I don't know where to find out who to contact =/

The emails to my manager were put as they were because she knows the ins and outs, conversations we'd had etc, so she is capable of compiling evidence, whereas (the incredibly useless) HR bods won't have a clue what's gone on specifically and couldn't give me these particular bits of evidence. I would MUCH prefer just to have confirmation of my leave date as opposed to nothing though, then even if HR can't provide those little titbits that could help, Manager might finally get off of her arse and provide me with SOMETHING as a bonus.

Thanks for the suggestion, I'd thought about going to higher management, but not HR...

 

[Pyrrhic]

H&R don't need to know the ins and outs though. They will have everything written down on files, and it's their job to find out the information and email you back. Just ask them for the same information you asked your line manager for date of leaving, and the fact it was unexpected and you were expected to return to work on X date.

 

[nightkd]

H&R don't need to know the ins and outs though. They will have everything written down on files, and it's their job to find out the information and email you back. Just ask them for the same information you asked your line manager for date of leaving, and the fact it was unexpected and you were expected to return to work on X date.

Yeah, it would just help me if they COULD provide confirmation of the ins and outs... They'll have very little written down as the department is full of incompetent morons.. Okay, I'm just trying to find out who to contact....

Thanks.

 

[nightkd]

Oh my Lordy... I just contacted DWP info for the HR address and they are out of office "expect a reply within 20 days"!!! WTF? Are they all making this purposefully difficult for me?!

 

[Vesta]

Are you friends with any of your former co-workers? You could ask them to put the information you need on some letter headed paper.

I've done this for co-workers and had it done for me, when management were dragging their heals.

 

[nightkd]

Are you friends with any of your former co-workers? You could ask them to put the information you need on some letter headed paper.

I've done this for co-workers and had it done for me, when management were dragging their heals.

I am in contact with one, but she's very busy - I'm also not sure she'd want to be seen as possibly going 'against' management, it's quite a close knit branch... I COULD contact others, there's a lady there who might do it for me... Again it's just whether people would feel awkward going against management and if the immigration people need a name/contact to confirm or anything; I don't think they'd want to have their names involved. It's another option though, I STILL can't find HR details... Mum might have a letter at home with their contact on it..

 

[Sarahkka]

Make it easy for her.
Write the letter yourself with all the info. Send it as an email attachment.
Ask her to review it, make any necessary corrections, print it, sign it and send the copies to wherever you need them to go. That way she doesn't have to do much at all and you get the letter you need. It will sit on the bottom of her to-do list indefinitely, otherwise.

 

[impatient1]

I'd contact HR or another manager or upper management. Good luck!

 

[nightkd]

Make it easy for her.
Write the letter yourself with all the info. Send it as an email attachment.
Ask her to review it, make any necessary corrections, print it, sign it and send the copies to wherever you need them to go. That way she doesn't have to do much at all and you get the letter you need. It will sit on the bottom of her to-do list indefinitely, otherwise.

That's not a bad idea actually. Thanks.

The DWP enquiry people who said "20 days for response" have responded. With the telephone number for employee shared services... Great. I don't want to be on the phone with those twats for an indefinite amount of time, they take forever to do anything and you get passed from person to person - I am on a PAYG type phone in the US calling the UK. Grrr. I asked for email, I'm sure they have one...

I'll sort something.

Thanks for the replies.

x

 

[Emma1980]

I think the best idea is writing your own letter and attaching it to an email to her, keep going with your email, being friendly, hope you had a good week off, just wanted to tap your memory to remind you about my requirements, ive added this letter, please edit and sign and return, BUT i would CC someone from HR into it, ensure your other emails are also on the bottom of the email so the person from HR can see you are being ignored, just stay friendly!