Experiences- do you live next to your in-laws?

[feedindy]

Thank so much for your input ladies. The good thing is, the in-laws have said they will not move in next door unless they have our blessing to do so. The plan was always that when they retire they would move to our neighborhood (it is a housing development). I really don't mind at all that they will be in the neighborhood, and when they look at the houses for sale, we already agreed that if we can see eachother's house it would be too close. But then the one next door popped up for sale and we got thinking about it. The more I think about it though, I think the main reason I would want them there is so we don't get bad neighbors. lol
I think you ladies are right that it may be too much though. Just too close. DD can have the same benefits if they live a block away, and we would get out space. The house price keeps dropping though because the market is so bad, so every time the price drops we just think it is a steal.

Unfortunately we would have no idea how independent or pushy they would be. They seem to have a social life now, but when they retire they will be moving to a different state and away from everything they know. I bet they will be bored and just be in our house all the time. At least if they were around the corner, it would be a little farther away.
If anyone else has experiences, please share!

 

[Emma&Freya]

I havent been in this situation but my Nan lives about 5 minutes away from my Mums and she is alwasy there and drives past the house to nose. She dioes it with me and I live 15 minutes away!

 

[Juicybaby88]

1 word for me sorry & that's never! I would hate the fact they could jus call in when they wanted & watch our exert move! I get on with the in laws but I'm sure it would change if they were that close x

 

[fluffpuffin]

My in-laws live a few houses down the road. We had to lay down some ground rules initially as they kept calling to see Isla all the time. But now they're very respectful of us and we don't see them every day. Sometimes it bothers me that they keep noticing I've gone out and ask me where I've been etc. and I can feel like they're being a bit nosy but they never judge or interfere. It really depends on what type of people your in-laws are. Mine are very helpful and will happily watch Isla whenever we need them to. Isla is very close to them which is lovely.

 

[babyjan]

I live less then 10 minute drive from my inlaws, and as much as I prefer going there less often, DH loves going there and if he had the chance of them moving in next door he would be over the moon lol, I find them rather annoying and I would hate them next door hopefully they don't move in next door to you!

 

[Kelly81]

From another point of view I grew up living across the road from my grandparents, they were my Dads parents so I know my mum got hacked off a fair few times at my Gran just appearing. She seemed to always turn up at weekends when we were having lunch and my Mum would feel uncomfortable eating in front of her, same if she was cleaning, ironing etc she always felt she had to drop what she was doing to be polite which ended up making her have a slight resentment against my Gran.

My Grandad died several years ago, one of my uncles lives with my Gran but now that she's older from time to time she needs lifts or errands running. Also she's quite forgetful sometimes and will tell you the same story five times over which does become annoying so that might be something to bare in mind for the future.

From my point of view, although as a teenager having my Gran around could sometimes be annoying for the most part I liked having family close and I miss it now that we live away from them. My Gran would often look after my cousins at weekends and during school holidays which meant they were around for me to play with, as we lived on a farm and away from my school friends this made a big difference to me. It was also nice to have somewhere else to go, lots of my childhood memories involve my cousins and I being outside playing with my Gran either in the summer or in the snow, she was definitely an all weather Granny!

 

[Supermaiden]

I think you have to think what your relationship is like with your inlaws right now. Would they be ok with you setting ground rules and would they stick to them?

 

[Fascination]

The problem is, if it all goes wrong, they've already bought their retirement home, which I'm assuming they won't be planning to sell any time soon and then you're stuck with them for years! I totally understand why you think it'd be better for your daughter with them being so close, but they could always find a different house in the same neighbourhood; you don't need to live in each others pockets.

It totally depends on the sort of people you are though. If you value your privacy and they're a bit intrusive, for example, it'd just be asking for trouble, but if you're both pretty easy going, it could be a really great deal. X

 

[aliss]

Yes we do.

We moved 5000km to be next to FIL. Frequent & fast babysitting far outweighs the annoyances. He came over a LOT in the beginning (mostly bc he was used to not seeing us often) but that wore off quickly and now it's normal.

I highly recommend it. He's been very helpful for fun stuff (so OH + I can go out) but also important stuff (my midwife appointments, broken toilets etc LOL). We've lived next to him for just over a year now.

His girlfriend is annoying but she's not my MIL so really I don't care...

 

[The Alchemist]

Well...looks like I'm the only one thus far that lives with OH's parents. It's both good and bad, depends on the situation. His parents don't bother us. Plus, they don't mind baby sitting when ever we need/want to go out. The only bad part is, of course, no privacy. We kind of just...."live" in our room, which is sooooo crowdef with baby things for such a large bedroom. And secondly, his parents are loud people when they talk and that's their normal tone. Even their tv is loud. But other than that, they are very good, kind-hearted people.....very naturally-loud people.

 

[Mrs_Random]

I have actually just bought a house on the same street as my parents!

My hubby was worried about being so close but both my parents work so they won't be there all the time and I think they will accept that they can't come over after 5.30 as that is when hubby gets to spend time with LO.

They already accept they won't see LO on a weekend as that's hubby's time and they only see him midweek, and that works well for us.

I'm looking forward to being closer to them, just so during the day we can go round for half hour and I can get a break from being on my own with LO and can still get away with saying I need to go get washing out or do something and go back home when I'm ready.

 

[michellle1980]

GOOD news is oh is on your side. with some stories on here I would be really worried but if oh does this now rather than after you can are how they react. good luck.