Fathers having nothing to do with there childern

[MishC]

Just a quick question really

Has the father of your child decided he wants nothing to do with his baby before it was born? And when you've had it has he changed his mind or have you decided to move away from him so he can't get intouch with you so you can start you life fresh?

 

[Novbaby08]

lol he avoided me when I was pregnant, and then when she was born came to the hospital, and when he left called me and told me he wanted to be on the birth certificate, too bad for him lol I already filled it out, and hes not on it. in fact she has my last name.

 

[starbucks101]

My daughters dad wants nothing to do with her, hates us apparently..

Didnt want anything to do with her since the moment i told him i was pregnant!

His loss!

 

[Charlotte-j]

my ex left me when i was about 24weeks pregnant, denied it was his. now says he dont wanna know her, but maybe he one day he might change his mind and says there aint a damn thing i can do about it. im lucky i live over 100miles away from him lol

 

[brownhairedmom]

Yeah mine doesn't want anything to do with either of us. We broke up when I was 12 weeks pregnant and now he's with the kind, considerate and wonderful girl that he cheated on me with. We haven't spoken since July and he hasn't responded to my informing him that she was born.

He lives 8 hours away, thank God.

 

[MishC]

How are you managing doing it alone?
How did you decide that doing it alone was the right choice?
IF you'd have had a termination would the father still be with you?
Did you think that by having a baby and been a single parent might ruin your own quality of life? E.g., been a single parent or not been able to go on exotic holidays anymore or not having the perfect house/family.

Sorry about all the personal questions i'm in a dilemma

 

[xJG30]

My ex was all for it when I got pregnant, reckoned he was gonna start saving and all that bollocks then left me when I was 15 weeks pregnant, hardly spoke to him over the pregnancy as he didn't wanna know.

Soon as I'd had the baby, he wanted to come see me, but due to high blood pressure and hating him, I didn't want him there, in the last 3 months, he's seen Tom 3 times, I invited him to the christening as he claimed he wanted to be a part of Tom's life but did fuck all through the christening and was more arsed about texting his current gf.

He never texts/calls to ask how his son is or anything, yet he moaned that i'd never stop him from seeing his son or paying towards him, we're yet to see any form of money!! he's supposedly coming up in December but I'm not allowing him to see Tom due to having shown no interest in him. He had time to come to Alton Towers (We live half hour from there) yet he didn't have time to come and see his son. I'm just grateful the wanker lives in Essex as if he lived up here, i would go down for life. He's on the birth certificate unfortunately and I so wish I hadn't put him down but eventually, my partner's gonna adopt him so he'll never have a play in our lives.

As for your questions:

I'm doing great alone, I have fantastic support from my parents due to living at home and my partner is great with LO.
I didn't have much choice doing it alone.
I'm against terminations but I think we would've grown apart anyway, he was too immature.
I don't really think about the quality of life, I've had all the nice holidays as a kid and haven't been abroad since 2001, we don't really need the fancy holidays etc but we have a perfect family and couldn't ask for more.

 

[brownhairedmom]

How are you managing doing it alone? With a very supportive family and great friends and constantly reminding myself that I'm a better person than him when I get down about it,


How did you decide that doing it alone was the right choice? The baby didn't ask to be created. It was our faults and if he wasn't going to step up to the plate I wasn't going to take it out on the poor child by aborting. So single parenting wasn't only the right choice for me, it was the only option I was willing to consider.

IF you'd have had a termination would the father still be with you? I thought that at first, but I think now that an abortion would have destroyed us even more and I'd resent him 100xs more than I do today ( which is pretty much will all my heart and soul). Our relationship was over anyway. I can move on with a baby but I don't think I could have moved on if I had an abortion and we broke up anyway. That would be my breaking point.

Did you think that by having a baby and been a single parent might ruin your own quality of life? E.g., been a single parent or not been able to go on exotic holidays anymore or not having the perfect house/family. No. You just enjoy different things. I worried about this in pregnancy but now I have no idea how I existed without her in my life for 21 years and she's only 11 days old.

 

[v2007]

How are you managing doing it alone?
When Mollie was born it was bloody hard. I was sick for 6 wks but she was n ace baby and was very placid. My mum n my family all helped out.

How did you decide that doing it alone was the right choice?
Her Dad was n still is a knob, the only thing he cares bout his gettin new notches in his post. He saw me once during my entire pregnancy and the day after she was born, the git tried it on wiv my younger sister!!

IF you'd have had a termination would the father still be with you? Nope.

Did you think that by having a baby and been a single parent might ruin your own quality of life? E.g., been a single parent or not been able to go on exotic holidays anymore or not having the perfect house/family.
I was a single mom for 4 yrs and i loved it. i enjoyed it. Yeh i mite have been poor at times but she had a nice roof over her head, warm food in her belly friends from nursery etc n a family who loves her.

V x x x

 

[Novbaby08]

How are you managing doing it alone?
Really good I think, in fact I'm glad to do it alone. I also have a very supportive family and lots of friends

How did you decide that doing it alone was the right choice?
Well her dad left, so it was either do it alone, or give her up.

IF you'd have had a termination would the father still be with you?
Not likely

Did you think that by having a baby and been a single parent might ruin your own quality of life?
No, I was more worried about the effect it would have on her in the long run. Like would she be hurt not knowing her dad.

 

[Dipar_Butt3]

How are you managing doing it alone? With God, and my mother.


How did you decide that doing it alone was the right choice? Because i feel since my kids are here. Somebody has to love them and be in their lives. And i choose to do that.


IF you'd have had a termination would the father still be with you? No..Because he was a player..He love more women and sex then anything else. And besides i'm pro-life. Termination is not a option.



Did you think that by having a baby and been a single parent might ruin your own quality of life? E.g., been a single parent or not been able to go on exotic holidays anymore or not having the perfect house/family.

No..Because you can still have fun with your kid/kids..You don't have to go to expensive place or holidays to have fun. And besides when you get use to taking care of your child/children..You forget about the time you can go out and stuff alone, like before.

 

[Pricey]

This is the boat I'm in, just flip it around...

She has left me and wants to be with someone else after 5 weeks apart, she's 20 weeks and I'm devastated.

 

[purpledahlia]

This is a v old post, like a year old

 

[xJG30]

Doesn't mean people can't reply..

 

[purpledahlia]

i know, wasnt meaning that. Just meant the people who originally started it might not read that its been read again, if u get me, coz the reply is to them..

 

[Welshcob]

I think that maybe if I'd have had a termination FOB would still be with me. Hes got scared about being out of control. He knows Termination not an option. So hes just walked and made sure I suffer along the way. I think honestly that part of his plan was to cause as much stress as possible so that I Miscarry again - like he did last time!
But thank God this has not happened. But I have moved away to hide from him and I'd like us to start a life afresh. I have no family support and therefore am scared stiff. I am vulnerable and therefore I wanted to be away from him incase he comes back manipulating and promising all I could wish for - which is what he has always done in the past. I also want to be able to birth without worrying hes going to turn up. So moving away was the only option really.