father's surname?

[wyates]

Hi,
My child has a name. However I want her to have this other name, with other words, I am considering changing her name.
The thing is that her father is English and so is his surname but mine is Scandinavian, and this first name I am thinking of to change to doesnt sound good with my name, like oil and water together..
I have asked my family and they say it will be confusing for her when she gets older that she has her father's surname that doesnt even see her, he has met her twice.
For me, it would be a) the first name sounds better with his surname b) it shows that even if hes not there she does have a father


Can you ladies (and maybe gentlemen) give me some of your reflections regarding this?


PS. I dont need his approval to change her surname to his, but if she or I would want to change it back to mine, we would need his approval which I doubt he would give somehow, or I dont know,..
Funny cause on the name institute's page they say a child can change their surname several times between parents surname but mentions nothing that needing the other parent's approval if changing back to the other surname.

 

[gemabee]

like i said in baby club... this is a bad idea.
ur child = ur name.
if he wanted somethin to do with u that would be a different matter.
xx

 

[teal]

Personally I wouldn't care if it sounded better - if FOB wasn't around there is no way I'd give my baby his surname. Even if FOB was around I still would have given my son my surname xx

 

[AppleBlossom]

^^ What they said. Bad idea

 

[rosie272]

Charlie has my surname as he has no contact with FOB whatsoever, I can't imagine giving him FOB's surname when he is not in his life at all! Thats going to cause all sorts of confusion down the line I think. Do you have a middle name or something you can give LO as a surname if yours is that bad?

 

[suzanne108]

Personally I wouldn't care if it sounded better - if FOB wasn't around there is no way I'd give my baby his surname. Even if FOB was around I still would have given my son my surname xx

I agree with teal

 

[Kacie]

I gave my daughter FOB's surname.. he was around then. I regret it. I so dearly wish I had the same surname as my daughter.. it just doesn't seem natural to have a different name, but it is the choice I made. He is still in her life and while that continues I feel ok with her having his surname.. If he ever decides not to be a part of her life I will consider changing her surname to the same as mine.

I wouldn't change it to his just because it sounds better.. you are the stable and constant parent in her life, your surname connects you both. I worry now what I am going to say when my daughter asks me why she has a different surname to me (and any possible future siblings).

I hope you make the right choice for you

xxxxxxxx