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feel like i've been dropped in a black hole

helen1234

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i've been with my oh 7 years, and suddenly out of the blue he wants more freedom to go out party as and when he chooses. and when i disagreed as we're a family i have a 13 yr old from previous relationship, and we have a baby due in january, we bought a house 18 mths ago and needs alot of work doing so we can't afford for him to be off when he feels like it.
things got really ugly on saturday when he bogged off to wedding without me, and in my hormonal state i turned up at the nite do, which was a maquee i pulled up well skidded up to the marquee in my little beetle (nearly got stuck in mud) and i told him exactly what i thought of him and that i was leaving him, luckily he was stood out side the marquee, but i would have walked in it i was sooo livid.
anyway we came home and it got ugly and he got vilent towards me punched the wall started smashing things up then as i was sat on the sofa he walked past me and booted my leg really hard, his mummy and daddy came round took him to hosp. ahhh poor boy NOT.
i went to my mums she lives 100 miles away in derbyshire, she wants me to leave him and move back, and i just want to go now too i'm shattered i cant cry anymore.
but i got a mortgage i'm gonna lose my job and everything,
i know i have to go he's so controling over me and has been in jail for violence and he's hit me before.
how am i going to pay for baby stuff wit no job and will i get housed if i have a mortgage.
but my biggest concern is rosie she overheard us and started saying please don't make me move house. breaks my heart.:cry:
anyone else been in this situation i feel really scared:cry::cry:
Helen x
 
I don't know really what to say except to give :hugs: and that everything will eventually work itself out and you will find a way even if it doesn't seem like that right now.

You do need to leave him. Any man who is violent towards their pregnant OH is a skeeze bag and will probably have no issue hurting you at a later time.
 
i know what i have to do, its just knowing how to do it.
its just so hard...
i know i can do it i did it when i was 18 from rosies dad, its just getting my head round the fact i have to face it all again, i just wanted a happy family and up until this weekend we were. he must have serious issues.
 
It'll be best for you, rosie and the new baby..Rosie will learn that when shes old enough to understand. If you stay with your mum you could get a part time job? And still get your Maternity Grant from the government to buy your baby stuff. Some websites sell packages of cots, prams bouncers etc.. Really hope things work out x
 
Don't really know what to say. Your OH sounds like a dick and you're probably better off without him :hugs:
 
makes it worse when his parents powder his excuses. he says he wants to be able to go and choose when he wants. errrmmm hello we have a baby coming in 24 weeks wouldnt we all like to just get up and have our freedom lol but unfortunatly we live in a society where we have constraints, i'm just not a party girl anymore and neither was he till a few weeks ago.
just shame he'll realise the party life doesnt last long, and by then i'll be 100 miles away back in m home village.
 
It'll be ur, ur and only ur decision...U can listen to others advices, but chose the one which best for u...
It's a possibillity, that he'll not harm u again, but it's also the possibility that he'll do it again if he can did it once. U should decided by urself do u want to give him one more chance or not.
What u decide will be best for u really! And don't be scary - everything will work out sooner or later although it's hard to believe now!!!
:hug:
 
What a nightmare. I say have some time apart. Can't you stay where you are and have him move out?
 

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