Feel stuck, what to do :(

[X_Kayleigh_x]

Hey guys! Im kayleigh and Im new to the site . Just looking for a bit of advice from other single mums out there. Im 27 yrs old and am 5 months pregnant with my baby boy which will be my first, me and his father were in a casual relationship and when i told him i when i told him i was pregnant he made it clear to me he didnt want me to have the baby - which of course i didnt agree with so he actually told me "f*** off then", i was upset and hurt and from then on hes totaly blanked me. He wouldnt answer my calls or texts so i left him be, it was only yesterday i found out sex of the baby so i just thought id text him to let him know- still no reply. I text asking if we could talk- no reply. Hes already got 5 kids and i know hes a good dad to them thats what hurts the most , he lives quite a distance from me im in cardiff hes in birmingham, i really dont know where to go from here. Do i just give up snd let him get away with it or? My friend suggested i turn up at his house where he lives with his mum when the baby is born. He doesnt have a job and i dont think he claims benefits either so i dont think the csa would be able to do much for me dvdn though hes got new cars every week, wears designer clothes and is on holiday all the time- another thing that annoys me. Sorry to rant i just feel stuck hes left me high and dry and hasnt even got the decency to speak to me about it. Advice plz? xx

 

[MissDee-89]

If he doesn't have a job and doesn't claim benefits how is he living like that?
Have you met his mum?
Sounds like a coward to me. What makes this child any different to the ones he already has?

 

[MissDee-89]

Oh and congratulations on your blue bump btw xx

 

[X_Kayleigh_x]

Thank u , yeah met his mum briefly once. I just feel so hurt tht he could do tht but more angry now

 

[beachgal]

I'm in a situation where it was casual and when I told fob he wanted nothing to do with me or baby.
At some point you will have to make a decision for the health of you and baby. The stress isn't worth it sometimes! I decided to cut off contact and move forward with my life and take care of me and baby on my own. I made a choice to not have someone like that involved bc no amount of money is worth having someone who doesn't care or want to be involved around me and my baby.
I know it doesn't feel great when you are in that situation but remember you and baby deserve the world. Don't settle for anything less. If he is going to be an ass and ignore you, then move on. There will be someone else who will come into your life and treat you and your little boy with the love you deserve

 

[Jade--x]

I personally would give up trying - You've given him every opportunity and he hasn't taken them - But I would just send him a message (an email would probably be best that way you can keep a copy) simply saying you're not going to chase him to have contact with his child, but you will keep the door open for him to have contact, and he knows where you are if he changes his mind. You don't need the stress of trying to make him be there - Its his loss at the end of the day.

And congratulations on your blue bump

 

[Mummy1995]

Id have no contact til your gorgeous boy is here andm when hes born, send him a pic - might dig at him a bit more than just words. Do you have a contact number for his mum? That could be a good way to get in. If hes still not bothered then file a csa case I know you said he has no job but then hell be on the system when hedoes get a job/claim. And leave it at that x