Feeling confused and bewildered!

[tigerlilly]

I don't know if you remember a post i put up about buying baby bits before our BFP as were on a very tight budget and it's just not possible to buy everything in the 9mths! we have bought things like bedding, bath, steamer these things we see as objects with a practical use and no emotional attachment and we are quite happy with this. We decided that for us buying clothing was a step too far and this is something we would buy when the pregnacy is well on it's way. So the other day we saw a cot we wanted on ebay so for fun we put on a bid and we won! and got the cot we wanted second hand for £36.00 instead of £180.00 new! We collected the cot and it's immaculate! so we were very pleased with our bargin buy.

The people who knew we were TTC thought buying goods was a great idea right up untill we showed them the cot My mum's not impressed because we would'nt take her old cot and she does'nt think it's a good idea to buy things untill well into pg. I understand this as she has suffered MC and her first baby only lived a couple of hrs. We have'nt told DH parents we have bought the cot DH and I are trying to remain positive and continue to support each other on our TTC journey on the up side the morning we went to collect the cot we had a positive for OV on the fertility monitor so a bit of
was in order before we left, (x3 over 24hrs) DH did look a bit shocked after popping to the shop and on coming through the front door I told him "to get his kit off"! and he did rather quick. So we're looking at the cot as a positive omen for our BFP and a reminder to stay focused and positive.



to you all x

 

[dachsundmom]

I am hoping that some of the ambivalence you are receiving from you family members is everyone's way of protecting their feelings; some people cannot see the bigger picture, only what is right in front of them.

If the cot is what you wanted and you are happy with your decision, then everyone else can shut it. We all deal with TTC in different ways and if buying baby items helps you, then I say go for it!

 

[velo]

It was suggested to me that collecting baby things before pregnancy could help with the whole nesting thing and help the body prepare for pregnancy. Personally I can't do it because I would find it too much of an emotional roller coaster buying baby things and then seeing BFNs.

If you feel it is a positive thing for you then definitely go for it. To hell what your family (or anyone else for that matter) thinks. Try to surround yourselves with positive people as much as possible. Unfortunately it sounds like you may need to be selective in what your share with your family if they don't share your enthusiasm.

 

[Natsby]

I´m sorry your feeling that way, but sometimes because people don´t agree with the way we do things it doesn´t mean they aren´t being supportive. It maybe that they don´t agree with buying things because they are worried about you, and how you will feel if things take longer than you planned, or don´t work out as you hoped. I don´t buy baby bits because having had two MC I couldn´t go through that again and then see those things in my home afterwards. I imagine you mum feels that way too. Likewise maybe they don´t talk to you about it because they don´t know how to broach the subject or worry they might upset you. It is hard to know why other people react the way they do as we can never know their motivation, but don´t presume they are rejecting you or being unsupportive, they maybe trying to protect you in the best way they know how.

 

[Indigo77]

^^wss

 

[tigerlilly]

thanx everyone