Fertility specialist work advice

[jodie4805]

Hi all

I have my 1st fertility specialist appointment in a couple of weeks, which I guess will be the 1st of many. I really don't want anyone at work to know that I am TTC. Do I have to tell my boss? Have you all told your boss/work colleges or have you just made excuses/booked time off?

 

[DragonMummy]

I told mine but we get on really well, however no, legally you are not obliged to tell them what your appointments are for and they have to give you time off for medical appts. x

 

[ReikiBaby]

I told my boss, he was great about it. Made things alot easier since I need to be out of the office so often. When anyone else asked what I was doing, I made things up!!!

 

[jodie4805]

thank you. I think I'll go with not telling him for now then.

 

[fifi-folle]

You could just say it's a hospital appointment and say you would rather not discuss it. Only a couple of weeks to go now for you! Are you excited?

 

[peartree]

I haven't told work. For my scans and appointments, I took annual leave if they were in the middle of the day, or went in a bit later (my company has flexitime) if they were early in the morning. For my egg collection, I told them I was having minor surgery, and took some days off on annual leave.

 

[Aphrodite]

Ive also told my 'work' that i am having some 'treatment' and need to have an operation EC week. My manager knows but no one else.

 

[jodie4805]

You could just say it's a hospital appointment and say you would rather not discuss it. Only a couple of weeks to go now for you! Are you excited?

I haven't really had time to think about it yet. I'm a bit stressed as OH's sperm analysis is turning out to be more complicated than I thought which we are trying to get done before our appointment. He had an appointment with his GP, then he had to have an appointment with the nurse at the GP surgery. The nurse didn't seem to know much about it & wasn't sure if she had given him the correct pot to use. Then he had to phone the hospital to book an appointment & couldn't get through, so I booked it for him & now he's having problems getting the time off work. He's booked in for this Friday, so hopefully I can stop stressing by the end of Friday.

 

[fifi-folle]

Why is it so difficult to get SA done? Our hospital only receives the samples three days a week and only between 9am and 10am, my DH is at work at 7am, I did say I could collect the pot from him but he doesn't fancy filling it in the loos at work!!!! Should be getting the second one handed in next week, hopefully in time for our appt. You have my sympathies!!!!

 

[jodie4805]

It is bad. OH is going to have to leave work half way through his shift, then go back to work after & then make the time up.

I hope everything goes okay at your appointment. I don't really know what to expect.

 

[fifi-folle]

Is there anything they think is causing the problems or will you be going through all the tests from the beginning? The first thing the consultant suggested with me is the HSG to check my tubes, although think that one will not be necessary. I'm lucky in a way to have the diagnosis of endo as that's a clear cause of infertility. Personally I'm hoping to be told to take aspirin or something!!!
I would suggest you take your BBT charts, take some notes of any gynae type things and what you are doing to try and get pregnant (supplements etc), I found my consultant took me way more seriously when I went in with three pages of typed notes as I have had gynae probs for years (this was for the first gynae cons appt, but we're now seeing her in fertility clinic!)

 

[jodie4805]

I don't know of any problems, but I'm thinking I may have endo due to long, heavy & painful periods. How did you get diagnosed with it/what were your symptoms?(if you don't mind me asking)
It's good that you already know your consultant.

 

[fifi-folle]

In addition to long, heavy, clotty periods I also had post coital bleeding (esp before AF), abdominal pain at ovulation continuing through to AF and beyond. I also suffer from really painful ovarian cysts at least a couple of times a year (for the past 10 years), the regular pain has worsened over the years, AF pain has increased stupidly and due to scar tissue I have pain all month long. My endo is rather bad though, mainly because it wasn't diagnosed when I first had symptoms (average length of time for diagnosis in UK is 8 years). Also pain on BDing, need to wee more often than normal and UTI symptoms without infection (due to endo on bladder), back pain, pain down legs, referred pain in shoulder, shooting pains up bum, bowel stuff, I am sure there were more symptoms but I've forgotten them.
My path to diagnosis was a long one, years of hospitalisations due to cysts, GP visits re bladder and bowel stuff, finally put my foot down and refused to leave hospital until I was taken seriously. Ended up going private as waiting list was too long (and DH moved jobs to one where I was covered by healthcare) and had first laparoscopy which showed extensive endo. Tried Zoladex (like down regging) but it didn't work, second lap showed endo had grown whilst on Zoladex (shouldn't happen) told to get pregnant as soon as possible while we still can (endo can be a progressive condition and definitely is with me). Phew that was a long one, sorry.
Had my first appt with consultant in December as not convinced the guy I was seeing knew what he was talking about, I knew more than he did, so back on NHS and seeing endo specialist. The appt I had with her didn't quite go to plan as scan showed I was preg, but she said if we lost it she would then see us in her fertility clinic.
If you are concerned you have endo you need to tell the consultant as a lot of them don't think of it unless you spell it out. Far too many gynaes don't understand it and think you only get it in your 30s/40s and after you have had kids.
Sorry for the essay, don't be shy if you have any questions!

 

[jodie4805]

Thanks for that. I'm not 100% certain I have it, but I do have some of the symptoms. Will definitely bring it up as an option. My periods have always been bad since they started many, many years ago.

It sounds like you've had a rough time with it.

In a strange way I hope that I have got it, so that I can understand why I suffer every month, when I know people who have never had a period pain in their lives. Also, if I have got it, then I can be treated for it instead of continually suffering every month.

Are your symptoms reduced since diagnosis/treatment?

 

[fifi-folle]

Totally understand what you mean, at least I have an explanation of my pain. The treatments/surgeries haven't really done much unfortunately, I think the worst of the pain is from scar tissue and where bits are stuck together, new gynae isn't keen to do another op as it can just make it worse with more scarring. BUT there are lots of women who respond well to treatment and the surgery can be very effective for some, I've just been unlucky. Still hopefully we'll be able to get preg and keep it to term eventually! The times I have been pregnant the pain has reduced quite a bit, so fingers crossed!
And I'll keep my fingers crossed for you!

 

[jodie4805]

well OH had SA today & results will take 2 weeks, so won't be ready for FS appointment.

 

[fifi-folle]

Hopefully the hospital can get them quicker than that! I know there are usually millions but surely they don't count every single sperm!?!?!

 

[jodie4805]

I'm not sure how it takes that long. Does seem very strange.